I am so in love with my boyfriend knowing that he has depression and on medications. I didn't know the real meaning of depression and how to handle a relationship with a depressed person not till I started browsing the web about this topic.

We have a big argument one day and he can't handle the thoughts of break-up pains, he panicked and he was like a wild animal running away for his safety. He left me but, I am still wanting to work things out for both of us. He is very pessimistic and told me that I broke his trust, reconciliation is not an option for him thinking that we might have fights that will end in breakup if we get back together again.Regardless of what he thinks,I still want him to feel that I still love and care about him...

This actually is his 2nd serious relationship, the first one failed and made him so depressed. Since then he never been into committed relationship not till he found me ( I am divorced and 6 years older than him by the way). We started building dreams, talking about marriage, and being together for a long long time and he even told me he is ready for comittment. But things are now different as it was the first time, I missed him, I missed us.

He is in a new place now and I told him that we can still keep the relationship but on a different pattern. He doesn't seem to be convinced telling me that it is not workable. He honestly told me that he want his old lifestyle back (being in an unnattached affair with different women),no commitment involved. He said, he can't be with me anymore, because he wants his own space. It is hurtful hearing this but, this is the way he can be out of guilt of cheating on me, I guess. But it also confuses me when he said that he wouldn't want me completely out of his life, because I am the biggest part of it.

I comfortedly told him that he have to make sure to be safety (healthwise) if he had choose this as final decision. I even told him that if that is where his comfort zone is, then so be it. But if he finds that there is no better comfort zone than being with me, I would let him find his way back to me. I have not closed the door of my heart for him yet, but I am not anticipating he may come back anytime soon. I also have to open my heart for any other opportunity that would knock on the door, as there might be someone who could fill the hole in my heart, I might then shut the door completely on my (depressed)boyfriend and move on.

But I am not sure as of this point in time if I could do the latter... PLEASE ADVISE!!

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Originally Posted by Lonely Ophelia

I am so inlove with my boyfriend knowing that he has depression and on medications. I didn't know the real meaning of depression and how to handle a relationship with a depressed person not till I started browsing the web about this topic.

We have a big argument one day and he can't handle the thoughts of break-up pains, he panicked and he was like a wild animal running away for his safety. He left me but, I am still wanting to work things out for both of us. He is very pessimistic and told me that I broke his trust, reconciliation is not an option for him thinking that we might have fights that will end in breakup if we get back together again.Regardless of what he thinks,I still want him to feel that I still love and care about him...

This actually is his 2nd serious relationship, the first one failed and made him so depressed. Since then he never been into committed relationship not till he found me ( I am divorced and 6 years older than him by the way). We started building dreams, talking about marriage, and being together for a long long time and he even told me he is ready for comittment. But things are now different as it was the first time, I missed him, I missed us.

He is in a new place now and I told him that we can still keep the relationship but on a different pattern. He doesn't seem to be convinced telling me that it is not workable. He honestly told me that he want his old lifestyle back (being in an unnattached affair with different women),no commitment involved. He said, he can't be with me anymore, because he wants his own space. It is hurtful hearing this but, this is the way he can be out of guilt of cheating on me, I guess. But it also confuses me when he said that he wouldn't want me completely out of his life, because I am the biggest part of it.

I comfortedly told him that he have to make sure to be safety (healthwise) if he had choose this as final decision. I even told him that if that is where his comfort zone is, then so be it. But if he finds that there is no better comfort zone than being with me, I would let him find his way back to me. I have not closed the door of my heart for him yet, but I am not anticipating he may come back anytime soon. I also have to open my heart for any other opportunity that would knock on the door, as there might be someone who could fill the hole in my heart, I might then shut the door completely on my (depressed)boyfriend and move on.

But I am not sure as of this point in time if I could do the latter..... PLEASE ADVISE!!!

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Only hearing this sound very depressing for me. I would advice you to go on with your life, seeing that he is a depressed person and he left you only on your first fight, well, then he will most probably do it again. If you go back to him and you have another fight, he could leave you or he will take more drastically measures like trying to hurt himself or even you. This is just advice I am giving you as I had been through the same experience! Hope all works out for you!