I already know the answer to this question, its yes obviously things can't stay this terrible for long.
My best and closest friend is going away to college. We hung out one on one for the last time.
I live like I have all the time in the world, so when time runs out like it finally did I don't know what to do with myself. Before I would just keep busy until I forgot about what was making me so sad, but now I don't know what to do. I don't want to do the things I love to do anymore, I don't know why but I can't seem to find an interest in anything and trying to force myself to keep busy is making me angry and miserable. But doing nothing is worse, when I just try to lay down or sit I get a rush of memories off all the things we did together.
We've been best and dear dear friends for a year, he's taught me EVERYTHING from calculus to trumpet to cards to bowling. Everything I know I learned from him. We've done everything together and we've been everywhere together. I talk the same as him and I think the same as him. I can't escape him. The silly thing is, I don't want to forget him ever! He's the most important thing to me by a landslide and I never never want to forget his face or his voice or anything.
Im stuck. I love him very much and though we were never together as a couple I know that I love him more then anything I've ever seen or anything I ever will see. He is my first love.
I guess what I'm asking is will I ever get over this feeling of emptiness, sadness, loneliness, dead feeling that he left me when he went away?
-Becca
(Thank you for reading all of that and listening)
