I just have one question you all see my pic on the side there. Does anyone think that I am ugly? Because there must be something wrong with me. Im 23 years old with my 7 year old son. I mean I don't know what I do wrong. But I was just wondering

I'm a gal; you are not ugly! You seem quite attractive. Just remember, people will perceive you the way you perceive yourself.

To answer your question about the pic. No, you look like you have a great smile. Absolutely not ugly. Opposite of.

But you need to explain more. This isn't about the pic, its about the problems. What losers? What's going on?

Hun, it's not what's on the outside, but what's on the inside. You can be drop dead gorgeous, but if you have a potty mouth, or an ugly attitude for example, you won't attract anything BUT losers.

Jen you are not ugly. It's that you have low self esteem and allow people to treat you badly. You attract what you put out. If you think that you do not deserve someone decent then you will get no one decent. You need to change how you see you. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks of you other then you.

Well the pic is like an inch big so its hard to really see you, but I wouldn't say you are ugly.

And to be honest if I was 23ish, I wouldn't want to hangout with a girl who has a 7 year old child. Im not 23 so my mind may change by then, but I don't think I would be ready to help take care of a child.

And another reason you may be getting the losers is because maybe you go bars or something when you have time off from your child. (Just a thought) I think the best place to meet a nice guy would be at a store. (Maybe you don't go to bars and you have met guys from stores, well then just keep waiting for the perfect guy. Your only 23, my mom didn't meet my dad until she was 32ish or something.

Oh and this is just a personal thought: If you ever feel like, "Why did i have this kid so young?" Just think how cool it is that you will be alive to his grandchildren and maybe their children. I wish my parents had me at a younger age because then I could have done more with them, my dad has a hard time playing sports and such, and I wish he was younger so we could play together or something.

Beat me to it, Hardcore got it bang on. The second I read you had a child I knew that was the issue, never mind the looks. Relationships are hard, finding girls you really like is hard, finding girls that like you are hard, making sure their parents like you and vice versa, a child makes those very hard things A lot harder. Dating someone who is 23 and has a child is very menacing to a guy, especially if they think long term, what about money, are you free all the time, will the child watch movies with you?

All these are factors, unfortunate that it prevents people from really getting to know you, but that is reality, sorry:(

Let me just add this...

I'm married to a great woman who had a child when she was 20. Single mom for some years. That doesn't mean she didn't date and have some relationships.

I completely agree that it makes things harder, or at least more complicated. Some younger guys are probably not going to know how to handle that, since they can barely handle themselves.

But I don't want you to feel like your child is a "problem". You are a parent, you know how hard it is and how rewarding it is. So you are looking for someone that can fit into your life, and that includes your sons life. Maybe that thins the field, at least for a time or for some younger guys, but that doesnt mean it's the reason you've had problems.

As I said, my wife dated for several years, guys I wouldn't say were losers, who maybe didn't match up perfectly... but that's just normal much of the time... with child or not. I was a single guy who didn't find the right person until I was late 20's. No child "kept me" from getting it right... it was just the way things went for me. Sometimes you find the person you're going to be with early, sometimes later, regardless of whether a child is present.

But I think its premature for anyone to say your child is the reason you attract, by your own words, losers. You still need to explain what the deal is. What problems have you had? Short term relationships? Problems keeping them? Problems with how they treat you? Problems getting emotionally attached? There's just too much we don't know.

And I'm not bashing the previous posters. Their opinions are valid... I just have a different angle and personal experience, having dated two young women with kids and having two friends who were also single mothers.

I agree with KP, no worries there, its just a general comment on a girl with a child in her younger 20's. I PRAY that nobody thinks I am suggesting that the child will only hold you back or destroy relationships, far from it. I only give advice as to what I would perceive if in the situation. I am young(28, yeah that's still young.. I... hope) and in the "dating world" these things exist. The general idea is that a girl with a child is considered "carrying baggage" but only in relation to the MATURITY of the guy in question. Some will have no problem dating in these circumstances, very responsible, mature twenty something's, others however, will not, again very unfortunate. WE all know guys are less mature than girls and the majority of twenty something's are less mature than more, I mean if someone farts I still laugh:)

What counts is the inside, if someone is after your appearance, then he is problly not the one you want.

PS-It's another thing if you are picky.:D

Well I'm 29 I would Date you I got 2 neices 5 and 9 u darlin aren't ugly at all :}

Thank you very much

You are Definitely not ugly , in fact quite Foxy :-)

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Originally Posted by Foxy459459

Thank you very much

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Your Welcome its all Good the thing I find about a lot of Girls With children is Most guys don't understand it's a package deal if you get the mom you got the child also if they can't except that then they isn't good enough for you and your son :)