Ok ladies,

We all know you've been the breaker once or twice....
And we know NC is powerful.

Still, What brought you back to a current or past boyfriend?
- some magic words
- actions
- situation
- the way he handled the break
- your friends said you were crazy

I mean all these guys are wondering when/if their lover ever comes back what prompted it. Most of the time it's the realization that you're going to lose something valuable to you - if he allows that feeling to happen.. but sometimes there might be a little tilt that did it for you...

For me its never happened. I try to work problems out in a relationship to death so by the time I break up I'm done.

However my friend dumped her boyfriend and they got back together. He gave her space and started calling after 2 months and every time he called he apologized for the right things. He would apologize for specific things he did that hurt her. They are now getting married. But that my only girlfriend who ever went back to an ex.

Good anecdote!

There is hope sports fans...

Well, at least one :-)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Ash123

Ok ladies,

We all know you've been the breaker once or twice....
And we know NC is powerful.

Still, What brought you back to a current or past boyfriend?
- some magic words
- actions
- situation
- the way he handled the break
- your friends said you were crazy

I mean all these guys are wondering when/if their lover ever comes back what prompted it. Most of the time it's the realization that you're going to lose something valuable to you - if he allows that feeling to happen..but sometimes there might be a little tilt that did it for you...

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in my situation, he kind of is the one that usually does no effort and I complain, which leads to ending.YET, he is the one who always comes back saying all the right things, and seems so true, only to fail us again(6 weeks ago)lol... so in my case if I love the person and we can communicate, I'm there to work it out.

but I will say in general I have seen people want what they can't have, for some reason it makes the person think. Kind of like absence makes the heart grow fonder= no contact. (but in my ex's case I think he was just boared and I was a comfort till something else came along and he knew if he said the right things I was there... sad but true

Honest revelation. Good clarity now...

Two relatives of mine got back together. One with their 'childhood sweetheart' and the other a late teen relationship which grew apart. They got back together in that case three years with NC.

The first my grandad wouldn't let my auntie see the bloke, they lived in the same village though. Anyway she got married fairly young to someone else. He died I think. Then she got married with the 'childhood sweetheart' not sure long after but they both have grown kids in their 30's and late 30's from their previous marriges. They are both in their 60's now.

It hasn't happened for me yet but I'm still hoping for the magic of N/C to work to bring my boyfriend home... As of now he's messing a girl who's the total opposite of me. Good thing for me her differences are all the things he hates... I think in know time he'll remember why he loves me and she just might help show him

Ash only one thing will bring them back and that's if they are missingyou...

You ask women what made them go back I'm sorry to say mate they don't even know half the time why they left or why they go back that's why they are always confused...

That's why if they wanta break show them thelife withoutyou!! SIMPLE

Yes, in many cases - the magic words are no words...

Although a sincere apology can help a lot if it is a single incident and she wants to put you in the dog house - with an unspoken date of release.

My ex broke up with me 5-6 times. I do agree with mckenzie she came always came back because she was missing me. She knew every she broke up with me I would take her back, but when she did come back all she would do is look into my eyes and we fell in love all over again. But after that she would say this is how / what I want out of the relationship and if that's not what I wanted leave her alone. So now the ball is in your court.

I look back now and see she was very controlling.

I'm bumping this back into existence. What if, humor me ladies and gents, the woman contacts you wanting to know how you've been after 5 months of a break. How does the man act henceforth?

Tell her "great thanks"... and see what she has to say next.

Observe the rules of Breakup/Survival (in my signature/link) and see what stage you are at.
Everyone, if they keep silent get a moment to communicate on their terms.
This may be yours.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Ash123

tell her "great thanks"....and see what she has to say next.

observe the rules of Breakup/Survival (in my signature/link) and see what stage you are at.
everyone, if they keep silent get a moment to communicate on their terms.
this may be yours.

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Please read my question here;

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...ed-140030.html

It seems you are very wise.

Ash, can you make the same question, yet asking guys what brought them back to the girl they left?

I think it's in my Break-up guide... It's words said up frront and hold ground.

Next, men won't marry for guilt. SO, no words of guilt. Just words of strength: Support, unconditional etc... I think since a lot of time passed for you all - the only thing to do is to state the truth - that you were in a different place then, and you regret the space you needed, but you wanted to make it clear that you still care - even if he does not want to pursue a romantic relationship - and if he ever wants to talk - you're there... his pride and time may make it hard to see clearly at this point... but it's up to you if you wish to take a risk to get CLOSURE.