Ask Me Help Desk

Ask Me Help Desk (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forum.php)
-   Etiquette (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=115)
-   -   Wedding Invitations (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=118259)

  • Aug 10, 2007, 04:16 AM
    bee138deb
    Wedding Invitations
    Should the grooms parents be included on the wedding invitation
  • Aug 10, 2007, 04:17 AM
    bee138deb
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by bee138deb
    Should the grooms parents be included on the wedding invitation

    Should the grooms parents be included on the wedding invitation
  • Aug 10, 2007, 07:43 AM
    LearningAsIGo
    Yes. If the brides parents are listed, the grooms should be as well.
    Its also acceptable to not list any parents by name.

    Since we hosted [re: paid] for our own wedding, we worded it this way:

    Jane June Doe
    &
    John Jared Doe
    Along with their parents
    Invite you to the celebration of their vows
    ... etc
  • Aug 12, 2007, 07:21 AM
    bee138deb
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by bee138deb
    should the grooms parents be included on the wedding invitation

    We are paying for the chair covers, the beer, champagne and the alcohol...
    And reharsal dinner
  • Aug 12, 2007, 08:31 AM
    jillianleab
    If I remember correctly, the groom's parents are included if they are paying for a portion of the wedding; the rehearsal dinner doesn't count because that is traditionally their expense anyway. So, if you are paying for chair covers, beer, champagne and alcohol, yes, you should be included. You are contributing to the cost of the wedding, which means you are a host - you should be listed. If the bride's parents pay for EVERYTHING you are (traditionally) not a host, and therefore get left off. However, in my book, both parents should be included because a wedding is celebrating two families coming together. I worded my invitations like this:

    Bride (first and middle)
    And
    Groom (first and middle)
    Together with their parents
    Bride's parents (Mr. and Mrs. James Smith)
    And
    Groom's parents (Mr. and Mrs. John White)
    Blah blah blah blah blah

    My parents and my fiance's parents both contributed to the cost of the weding, so they were both on the invitation. If you go to a stationary store where invitations are ordered the books will have sample wording for you. Almost any wedding planner (book or person) will have it as well.
  • Aug 13, 2007, 05:39 AM
    LearningAsIGo
    It shouldn't really be about how much money was contributed. If one set of parents are on the invite, both should be. If the grooms parents pay less (or are less involved) list their names second under the brides parents. Vice Versa could apply.
    Basically, it should be all or none with parents names. You can't exclude only one set of parents.

    Example:

    Jane Doe
    &
    John Smith
    Along with their parents
    Mary and Todd Doe
    And
    Eliza Jones and Joe Smith
    Invite you to...
  • Aug 13, 2007, 08:54 AM
    jillianleab
    Learning, I agree, but I seem to recall from when I worked at a stationary store the "traditional" way was to list the bride's parents only if they are the only one's paying. It seems to me most people do not follow this "tradition", however, as it is a bit, she we say, stuffy!
  • Aug 13, 2007, 10:14 AM
    LearningAsIGo
    Jillian,
    I'm sure you're right, I just can't imagine only listing one set of parents! Some can't afford to help... my mom couldn't do anything at all... but imagine the hurt feelings if she wasn't mentioned! I can see why "tradition" is breaking the mold. ;) We made it even by saying "parents" since DH and I paid 95%... and the invites didn't have enough room. LOL
  • Aug 13, 2007, 10:53 AM
    jillianleab
    I agree, it's rude to leave one parent off because of lack of financial contribution! To me, THAT is the bad etiquette!

  • All times are GMT -7. The time now is 08:40 AM.