Let me start by giving a little background. I'm in this great relationship with the man of my dreams! We have OMG great sex. You name it we do it. But from time to time I have the want to be with a woman (I've done it before, but it was when I was a teen).
So I have brought up the idea to my man about having a 3 some, and well he's for it. BUT the problem that I'm having here is, how does one find a person for this. When I was younger it was just easier. I just don't know how to go about finding a 3rd for us.

Any ideas??

I guess what floats your boat, normally a 3 way sexual thing never works out well, and the couple normally break up. Assuming they are a real couple, not just sex partners. So if he is a man of your dreams, this is not a way to keep him.

But there are everything from web sites to asking friends.

I agree Fr_Chuck! It may sound enticing at the moment but since you cannot predict the future you just don't know how all of this will make you and you hubby feel after the deed is done. I wouldn't recommend it! Fine and dandy if your single and you get a 3some group going on but being married... not good. If you are still bound and determined to do this it would probably be best to search the net for someone, I guess. All of you should be tested before hand as well.

Although I've never done this, friends who have have said to make sure it's not someone your close to, an acquaintance is fine but not a close friend. As said above it could be weird between all 3 parties afterwards.

Hello.

A fantasy life is fantastic, it can spice up a relationship BUT when you move from fantasy to reality your taking the chance of losing it all. Some couples can handel it but most can't. Adding partners opens up many doors that should be kept closed. Think about it.. Maybe she has a bigger chest then you or can do things sexually better then you. Maybe you or your Man will want to do this more and more, where does it stop. One person says its time to stop and the other says no way I need more.

To be safe keep it a fantasy. Get a wig and do all the nasty things you can think of but don't bring another person into your bedroom.

Dennis777

This former neighbor of mine, her husband wanted her to be with other men so he could watch, she did not want to at first, (or so she said) and gave in and did it (alot). Now she is with another man. I wonder how her ex feels now. I worked with a lady and she would always come in upset that her hubby wanted her to swing, she did and eventually he left her, he told her he had no respect for her. My boss and her hubby swings they are in their 60's and still together. I guess 1 out of 3 is not to bad. Do you want to take that chance to full fill a fantasy?

If you're hot (like my ex) it's not hard to find one.
A little light banter and some white wine and it's showtime!

BUT WARNING:
twosomes that want to become threesomes are destined to become onesomes.

Sad, because it's sooo hot... re: my EX who wanted them - I took a pass... (bad choice?)

It's just that respect is mandatory in a longterm relationship... I just knew I couldn't keep it after that.

Frankly, aftera few experiments past like 21 yrs. Old, it's usually a sign of some unfulfilled need elsewhere (childhood, marriage, sexuall persuasion) that leads to more problems than solutions... but that's just my take.

Threesomes work FINE if you set rules, stick to the rules, and make sure that all parties involved are there when the rules are made.

The people that get all whacked about having respect afterwards aren't looking for a threesome--they're testing their partner, only they don't tell them that it's a test, and they don't give any indication as to which way is the right answer until the wrong answer is chosen.

I have been the 3rd in a threesome with a couple that's been married going on 15 years now. I've also HAD a threesome where I was part of the couple, and we're not having any problems with "respect" or "love" or "jealousy" or any of that stupid crap that everyone tells you is ALWAYS going to happen with a threesome.

The issue is not that threesomes are bad. The issue is that people are stupid about their reasons for having one in the first place, and stupid for not setting and maintaining rules.

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Originally Posted by Synnen

Threesomes work FINE if you set rules, stick to the rules, and make sure that all parties involved are there when the rules are made.

The people that get all whacked about having respect afterwards aren't looking for a threesome--they're testing their partner, only they don't tell them that it's a test, and they don't give any indication as to which way is the right answer until the wrong answer is chosen.

I have been the 3rd in a threesome with a couple that's been married going on 15 years now. I've also HAD a threesome where I was part of the couple, and we're not having any problems with "respect" or "love" or "jealousy" or any of that stupid crap that everyone tells you is ALWAYS going to happen with a threesome.

The issue is not that threesomes are bad. The issue is that people are stupid about their reasons for having one in the first place, and stupid for not setting and maintaining rules.

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We have already talked about ALL rules and we're not having any problems.
It all comes down to, it's something I've done in my past and I would love to do it again. He's for it and so am I. We trust each other and we love each other very much. And also, we're looking for just "fun" nothing more!

Now its true. You can't predict the future. But most of the time (out of couples I've seen) threesomes never ruined their relationship. Have you ever read the "Joy of sex" books? There's some stuff about threesomes in there that is good advice and information. And yes to all you who are reading my post and shaking their heads. It also covers insecurity and other aspects which can cause someone to try a threesome to keep a relationship together. But when it comes to three consenting adults there is nothing wrong with it. My boyfriend and I over these last 6 years have had quite a few threesomes. Not once did they ruin our relationship. No one should be forced into a situation like that but if everyone wants to give it a shot. Let them fill their boots. And having a threesome with a close friend isn't always as bad as people say it can or will be. My first and definitely not last experience was with my best friend from high school. Its been a few years since then but we still keep in contact and we still spend time together. She as a boyfriend now, he knows what she used to be like with us and he doesn't even mind when she comes to just hang out. Just remember. If the other person is in a relationship... RESPECT that relationship and don't push them to join in with you. I've found you can meet a wonderful girl just about anywheres. I've met a few at pool halls, bars, parties and a few other places. I've even met a few women online. Which if your careful isn't such a bad thing at all. I found if you want to try and find someone through the web there's a few places you can go about doing it. Such as AdultFriendFinder... good luck and just remember. Have fun and if its meant to happen it will. Just be outgoing and friendly

Your very welcome hun

Hmmmm, maybe can work. But the time and effort required to ensure its pain free is only worth it for a few.. I've seen 2 couples go down after them.

Everyone is different though.. just remember stop means stop

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Originally Posted by binx44

everyone is different though.. just remember stop means stop

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Yes we know that, that word means that... no matter what your doing in life! :)

*smiles* yea I know I just felt like it should be there at least once :D

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Originally Posted by binx44

*smiles* yea i know i just felt like it should be there atleast once :D

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:D :) :D :) yes