Hi,

Well I tend to fall in love really easy... I'm gay and I'm 17... and I don't know if it's really love and sometimes I really think I should go to see a psychiatrist...

Like 2 days ago I met a new guy online and he was nice etc... and guess what... I loved him... I love so many guys right now I can't count them... and I do think it's real love :(...
Anyway, yesterday one of the guys and me had some troubles and we were talking and then he was like "let's just be friend ok?", id like to mention that he was drunk the day before and told me a lot of things I didn't want to hear... it was hurting... ok... when he said the friends thing, I was mad... because the day before when he was drunk, I already cried for like 1 hour when he went to bed. I even loved his brother but now I feel nothing anymore for any of them... I'm just so confused what I should do... my heart hurts so much and it's depressing, I don't want to destroy myself with all this. I could give a lot of examples like this but it would make me cry...

-Elk

I think you just need to figure out that there is a difference between being in love with someone and being infatuated with them. They are two very different things. There is nothing wrong with getting excited about a new prospect you just have to tell yourself "this is not love". All of those excited feelings you have are infatuation or more commonly referred to as a crush. You just have to try to keep your wits about you when it comes to new boy on the scene. Which I know is very hard to do! If necessary write a note on your mirror that says "Its a crush not love" and repeat it 5 times every time you look in the mirror.

To add to what Glinda says, love takes time to achieve. It is not something you feel overnight. It takes months, years.

You are infatuated, in lust maybe, but not love.

But it feels like love and they even tell me that they love me too... maybe its because I don't really get much love in real life... I don't go out and I don't want to... I seek for love and I seek for a hug of a boy, I'm the only gay guy in my village and not even fully outed because I KNOW how they will react because they are really old fashioned etc... I don't feel lust M_M I don't want them in bed... I want to cuddle with them etc and do stuff ;_;

You are just feeling the vibes of someone caring for you and for kindness. Please do not mistake it for love. All you are going to do is break your own heart and that's not fair to you, is it? Don't get caught up in how someone else feels.

They tell you they love you, but they don't KNOW you. This is the internet, people can, and do, say whatever they want.

Do you know for a fact that you are not talking to a 500 pound cross dresser from Ethiopia? No you don't. You can't take their word for it. You don't know who is on the other end of the monitor.

Love comes in time, a long time. You have to know someone face-to-face for months and years to develop actual LOVE. Not lust or infatuation, but LOVE.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by J_9

They tell you they love you, but they don't KNOW you. This is the internet, people can, and do, say whatever they want.

Do you know for a fact that you are not talking to a 500 pound cross dresser from Ethiopia? No you don't. You can't take their word for it. You don't know who is on the other end of the monitor.

Love comes in time, a long time. You have to know someone face-to-face for months and years to develop actual LOVE. Not lust or infatuation, but LOVE.

---

There's something like webcam, you know ;/?
I'm pretty got at analyzing personalities of people who are online... ;(
When I was 12 I even had a boyfriend who was 25, online of course...
Guess how long it took to fall in love... yea... 1 day

I know there are webcams, I'm not that stupid. I also don't fall in love in 1 day, lust maybe, not love.

When you were 12 and had a BF who was 25, that was illegal. He was a pedophile and should be in prison for that.

Maybe time to step back from the computer and really think of just WHO and WHAT you are?

However, I am pretty good at analyzing people. I can tell right now that no matter what we say, or however we try to help, you are not going to listen. You are going to go with what you think and what you think is okay with you.

>>However, I am pretty good at analyzing people. I can tell right now that no matter what we say, or however we try to help, you are not going to listen. You are going to go with what you think and what you think is okay with you.

Yea you're right, that's common at teenager... :/
But I'm computer addicted and can't just leave...

Understand that there will be many "loves" in your life, and love knowing that it may not last.

Do you ever fear of being hurt again with the newest "love"? That would be enough for Me to reconsider what love is the next time it comes around.

Somehow it feels good when someone breaks my heart... after I get over it I feel so much more powerful >.<!

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Elk Darkshire

Yea you're right, thats common at teenager... :/
But I'm computer addicted and can't just leave...

---

What is it that you do on the computer? Computer games? Myspace? Or just browsing?

I've been addicted to computer games for the past 4 years, and I'm just starting to get off them. Being on the computer all the time really drains you of a social life and a possibly great relationship with friends.