Ask Me Help Desk

Ask Me Help Desk (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forum.php)
-   Relationships (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=277)
-   -   Am I pushing too hard? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=116849)

  • Aug 5, 2007, 06:38 PM
    storm71k
    Am I pushing too hard?
    Hi thank you so much for the ideas and I agree. It might be too late since he already broke up with me two weeks ago. My bad I sent him a dozen of mail last week explaining, how sorry I am for my shortcomings (I know I have had lot of shortcomings to our relationship to keep it alive, I'm just good in telling and maybe just being clingy and needy and that what I was so good at), tried to convince him that I've already realized my mistakes and want to straighten it up, and giving him some clues that I still want him back and just earlier he was texting me that it wasn't all about the thing that had done or said lately but its all about a lot of thinking and all included and he decided to go his own way. It was the first time he responded to me after a while. But then I replied that I want him back and I know I was making a mistake but I can't help it but say it. It takes a while when he responded that he was sorry that he can't both the one to break up and the one to comfort. I don't know what I feel its kind of mixed feelings but I was glad at least he replied. I am not planning to reply but just today I am thinking sending him text about sending me my document from his computer and letting him know that I started already getting something he's not expecting me I will do (nice thing). Also to divert my mind and my attention. To be honest I really want him back. I am planning to wait until a month and then I will call him and suggest something out of relationship just to keep in contact with him. My problem he is a miles away and it might be impossible for us to cross our ways again. So I am confused how to make thing happen if I started working out on getting him back. There's a lot of risk I know and the possibility of losing him for good but I am determined to do it.. just don't know the exact timing and how it will going to happen since he lives in different country. Do you have any suggestions when is the right timing to contact him after a while of being silent, what's the best move and the right word to say, and how it is going to happen if he lives a miles a way? Is there any possibility?
  • Aug 5, 2007, 07:38 PM
    Ash123
    I'd suggest this (but you may not like it): https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...sh-114179.html

    Hang in there!
  • Aug 5, 2007, 07:46 PM
    shygrneyzs
    There is no possibility at this time. Honestly. Don't go after him, it is beginning to sound like stalking. Your behavior is clingy and dependent. No one wants that in a partner.

    You need to take this distance and time to gather yourself together and concentrate on life after "him." Place your focus on your own emotional well being - without "him." Find all the good in yourself and pay attention to that. Get involved in other things such as volunteering, a hobby, getting out in the public, going to events, making other friends. Things that are positive for yourself and will help you place your life in perspective. If need be, go and talk to a therapist about this relationship and what all happened - so you do not repeat behavior. There usually are warning signs but people often do not see them.

    Don't call this guy in a month, or two months, or even six months. Just do not call him, email him, text him, snail mail or any contact of any kind. You are not going to get over him if you do not try. He has placed distance between you and him and now you need to accept that and move on.

    The very best of luck to you.

  • All times are GMT -7. The time now is 02:10 AM.