hi everyone, back again venting!

long story short... to sum up all my other post on here, after trying again with my ex and failing 6 weeks ago because of him always pursuing me only to end up treating me like a door mat, like never including me in his life with family and friends, never sleeping over, telling me the less we see each other the better... (u get the pic) or u can read my posts... ( :

well, its been a 12 yr relationship and we are both 38... when I told him he was not living up to what he said he wanted from us, he said want to take a break?? I said are u crazy, that's the last thing we need is a break. Then he said OK, see u around!!

today it came to my attention that he has been dating someone for a month, started talking to her the last 2 weeks while with me... they are together everyday!! he sleeps over, go to the gym together, all the things I told him we were missing with each other.

I can't believe he moved on so quik with someone, and doing all he is with her... I guess what I'm trying to vent is it made me feel worse, as I was doing fine, but this has set me back a little... to hear this hurts because I really know he never could have loved me and it was all lies when he came around. I feel so foolish... can't believe he is with someone so quik... thanx for listening...

Of course it's going to hurt, who in the right mind wouldn't be?
Time to pick up the pieces and move on, there is no time to feel sorry for yourself. He isn't worth it. Find someone who will love you the way you deserve to be, and you'll be thankful you lost this jerk.

Ugh! Well think αbout it this wαy he's hαppy right now αnd your αt home upset-- course it hurts but you don't see him crying [of course not guys α jerks-- I'm α bit of α mαnhαter todαy]

It'll tαke time for you to get over him-- αnd your doing α greαt job: venting is αn excellent thing to do.. αlso going out with friends, excercising, meeting new people.. hαve fun becαuse αfter αll mr.insensitive is-- why cαn't you?

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Originally Posted by SpawnOfAzazel

Of course it's going to hurt, who in the right mind wouldn't be?
Time to pick up the pieces and move on, there is no time to feel sorry for yourself. He isn't worth it. Find someone who will love you the way you deserve to be, and you'll be thankful you lost this jerk.

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He isn't worth it, thanks for responding..

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Originally Posted by saraispiel19

ugh! well think αbout it this wαy he's hαppy right now αnd your αt home upset-- course it hurts but you don't see him crying [of course not guys α jerks-- i'm α bit of α mαnhαter todαy]

it'll tαke time for you to get over him-- αnd your doing α greαt job: venting is αn excellent thing to do.. αlso going out with friends, excercising, meeting new people.. hαve fun becαuse αfter αll mr.insensitive is-- why cαn't you?

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Thanks was suppose to go out tonight but canceled... just wish he was honest, or at least dumped me first...

Then go out by your lonesome!! It's FRIDAY NIGHT! Go to the beαch --wαlk, reαd α book.. go to the mαll try on cute clothes, go to the bαr dress super sexy becαuse you αre! Get free cocktαils! Girl you need to hαve some fun you just got out of α 12 yeαr sentence :P

Go, go, go! If I were your friend you'd be out αnd dressed by now αnd we'd hαve some fun!

Good luck to yα girlie<3

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Originally Posted by saraispiel19

then go out by your lonesome!!!!!!!!!!! it's FRIDAY NIGHT!! go to the beαch --wαlk, reαd α book.. go to the mαll try on cute clothes, go to the bαr dress super sexy becαuse you αre!! get free cocktαils! girl you need to hαve some fun you just got out of α 12 yeαr sentence :P

go, go, go!! if i were your friend you'd be out αnd dressed by now αnd we'd hαve some fun!!

good luck to yα girlie<3

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Thanks a lot, u made me laugh...

I know how you feel dear my ex has startes seeing someone else and despite his protests it is nothing serious they are together all that time he says he only sees her now and again but they stay over at eahch other execpt foir 2 nights a wek hrdly non serious to me but hay what gives. I think he trying to spare my feeling but he with her and that's that so sparing my feelings by lying not a help.Yes it does hurt that he doing thiongs with her he wouldn't with you you wonder what was so wrong woth with you he didn't want do these things with you. I can not say how long it will take you to get over it it been 17 weeks for me no where near over him yet.I know I need tomovemy sorry on and all I can say is try not to dwell on it very hard and seeing them about is a killer for sure hopefully you willmeet someone else who deserves you I am not rushing into anything as I feel it would be unfair in involve anyone else in my emotional mess at the momnent I suggest you do the same take care hope it goes well for u

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Originally Posted by hettie

I know how u feel dear my ex has startes seeing someone else and despite his protests it is nothin serious they are together all that time he says he only sees her now and again but they stay over at eahch other execpt foir 2 nights a wek hrdly non serious to me but hay what gives. I think he trying to spare my feeling but he with her n thats that so sparing my feelings by lying not a help.Yes it does hurt that he doing thiongs with her he wouldnt with you you wonder what was so wrong woth with u he didnt want do these things with you. I can not say how long it will take you to get over it it been 17 weeks for me no where near over him yet.I know I need tomovemy sorry on and all i can say is try not to dwell on it very hard and seeing them about is a killer for sure hopefully u willmeet someone else who deserves you I am not rushing into anything as i feel it would be unfair in involve anyone else in my emotional mess at the momnent i suggest u do the same take care hope it goes well for u

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Hi thanks for th response, sorry to hear yr sad too! Yes I know it takes time, my problem is or was I always believed him when he said I was his soul mate, then he does this... I guess actions speak louder than words??

I'm to blame too for always beliving him and letting him back, I need to realize he is a liar.
Do you still see or talk to your ex?

I know you know what to do, so go about getting back to healthy, and move on, and be happy with yourself. A set back doesn't mean, stay back.

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Originally Posted by talaniman

I know you know what to do, so go about getting back to healthy, and move on, and be happy with yourself. A set back doesn't mean, stay back.

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Thanks tal, so embarresed that I trusted him again, he comes back and it always ends with me leaving 20 voicemails to get things of my chest, which now that the dust has settled I wish I didn't, now I look like the nut... I was scared to read yr answer to me lol, thought you would be like how can she still be in this situation?? Lol thanks again for responding ( :

Hi hair yes I do still talk text see ex he stay round corner so he unavoidable I shouldn't phone/ text himthis I know but again he never ignores me either so who knows I live in the hope he will see what he is missing inme by being with someone else but in reality I am only hurting myself as he has moved on and so must I u know where I am if you need my send a private message if uwant we will get through this OK I would really recommend no contact as hard as it is and the saying pot kettle black spriings to mind because I call my ex but it does delay the healing process urghhhhhhhhhhhhh ehy do we do it to ourselves eh?

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Originally Posted by hettie

hi hair yes i do still talk text see ex he stay round corner so he unavoidable i shouldnt phone/ text himthis i know but again he never ignores me either so who knows i live in the hope he will see what he is missing inme by being with someone else but in reality i am only hurting myself as he has moved on and so must i u know where i am if u need my send a private message if uwant we will get thru this ok i would really recommend no contact as hard as it is and the saying pot kettle black spriings to mind cos i call my ex but it does delay the healing process urghhhhhhhhhhhhh ehy do we do it to ourselves eh?

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Hi hettie, my ex lives 10 houses away from my wrk, and in the same city... every time we have broken up, I have the utmost respect for him, meaning I never bother him, whether he is with someone or not, if I'm lonely or not etc... HE always initiates the contact, with his crying, soulmate crap, ( u can read my posts ) and it always made me think " he must mean somthing " if he puts this much effort into it... low and behold, no sooner he's with me, I'm on the back burner again... then I tell him its not the way it should be, and he gives me the I don't want to be smothered crap, I've come to realize its just with me he feels this with, and I'm only important when he has no one else. He wouldt be able to be with another if he really felt any thing he says to me when he is bored.

We can private each other, that would be great...

Men eh if only my ex could see the false hope he giving me saying his new relationship is nothing serious then again so does his daughter she does not see it lasting either in fact nobody does I wish him wellamnd hope he is hapy and if it works for him well like I say as long as he happy because even if it not work with her the ultimate thing is he not want me sadly

Men can't live with them not allowed to shoot them

This feeling that you're feeling... I know it... it almost makes you wonder if the heart-fluttering goodness of a new relationship is worth it - if it ends with such devastating feelings of loss.

I think that we feel such loss because we put so much trust and effort into a relationship, and truly believe that the person we are sharing with is worth our last breathe on earth... so when we have been so blind to not see their lies, we are devastated that we missed the signs...

BUT - we live and learn...

Spend some time finding yourself again - someone mentioned shopping at the mall or dressing up for cocktails - I would recommend it all... if you feel beautiful, then you are beautiful, and before you know it those heart-flutters will be back with the arrival of another heartless ba*stard! Hehehe... hey - the laws of probability would have it that at some stage, we have to find a winner!

Good luck =)

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Originally Posted by Pook_Myster

This feeling that you're feeling.....I know it......it almost makes you wonder if the heart-fluttering goodness of a new relationship is worth it - if it ends with such devastating feelings of loss.

I think that we feel such loss because we put so much trust and effort into a relationship, and truely believe that the person we are sharing with is worth our last breathe on earth.....so when we have been so blind to not see their lies, we are devasted that we missed the signs.....

BUT - we live and learn......

Spend some time finding yourself again - someone mentioned shopping at the mall or dressing up for cocktails - I would recommend it all......if you feel beautiful, then you are beautiful, and before you know it those heart-flutters will be back with the arrival of another heartless ba*stard! Hehehe......hey - the laws of probability would have it that at some stage, we have to find a winner!

Good luck =)

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Hi thanks... yes you are so right, we put so much trust in it, which I think 2 people should do for each other its just everyone else notices your being a fool except u! Because you don't want to believe someone can do this to u. and in my case for so long, and so many times, and then do date someone right away.

You made me laugh with the arrival of another. I meet guys, but my heart is just not in it yet, but I go out on dates, and friends a lot, its just I'm still a little down at times. And if I go shopping anymore I will be able to open my own store soon.. lol ( I have a shoe, and sun dress problem).. lol. Good luck to u 2, and thanks for responding it helps a lot ( ;

So how you doing todαy-- how wαs your weekend miss lαdy :):):)

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Originally Posted by saraispiel19

so how you doing todαy-- how wαs your weekend miss lαdy :):):)

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Hey how are you? Doing pretty good, went out for a few beverages yesterday... lol.. with a few friends, always laughing with them, thank you so much for asking, I really appreciate it hon... some days good some bad : ) it will suck tomorrow when I go to work because he lives right near there and if I c him it hurts and I want to whip something at him... lol.. u know what I mean I'm sure.

hαhα -- well flipping the bird would give you some sαtisfαction but to him it'll seem like your still mαd αt him αnd still in love with him --guys αre too crαzy I tell yα...

Why don't you give one of your co-workers α ride becαuse αfter work you'll be going to the mαll or grαb some cocktαils with them [right ;)].. αnd if he's outside picking his bum while getting the mαil αnd hαppens to see you he'll see you with α friend smiling αnd lαughing like nothing hαppened.. :):)

Or second option when driving by the house don't drive slowly or too quick keep it normαl like you've been driving α few miles bαck- don't look αlthough it'll be tempting but thαts whαt reαrview mirrors αre for.. plαy music so you cαn concentrαte on it-- pick α song like "wαsted: by cαrrie underwood" or "redneck womαn- by gretchen wilson"--- plαy α song thαt you like, but not α song thαt wαs "your song" with him or αnything like "endless love".. nothing romαntic fαncy dαncy.. αnd when your wαy to work plαy thαt song, by the time you know the lyrics you won't even know it when you pαss by his house :)

I did thαt worked for me... XXOO my song BTW wαs "i wαlk the line: by johnny cαsh"

Hi hair good to see your feeling a bit betteri lost thr ring my ex got me last crimbo totally gutted about it can't find it anywhere feels like ilost another part of him again it like another sign he never coming back grrrrrrrrr be strong when you pass him and as always take care