My boyfriend and I have been dating for 8 months and a constant battle with us is his friends, he has so many! He has often told me he has a hard time fitting me in with his friends, which is ridiculous, he often tells me at the last minute when he is hanging out with them, especially on a Friday! Did I also forget the girls, one of them is an ex which he still insists on seeing on occasion and he always wants to hang out with them.
How much time is too much time for a guy to spend with his friends on a weekly basis? Is it fair for my boyfriend to not bring me out with his friends especially when they go out on a Friday night? Help me please I am going insane but I do not want to loose a otherwise great boyfriend.

Guys need guy time and that's OK, even on a Friday night sometimes. But if he's ditching you to go hang out with a group that includes his ex-girlfriend, that seems wrong. If it is so innocent, then you should be invited along, especially if other girls are there. If it is just the guys hanging out, then I could understand it a little more. If you try to set limits on his guy time he is probably going to get mad and push you away further. Be understanding of his need to have guy time but tell him that you feel it's important to spend enough time together as a couple and that you don't like it when he cancels or changes plans on you at the last minute. Otherwise, when he has guy time, go hang out with your girls. If you want to hang onto him you don't want to suffocate him, but you should be a priority in his schedule, especially compared to his ex.

Well if he goes out with the guys, you should make a girls night out. I don't understand why he doesn't bring you with him did he say why?

Hmmm sounds fishy to me-- I αgree with the others, if he spends more time with his ex then you, confront him αbout this αnd if he gets defensive then you better be αwαre of whαt he is αctuαlly doing.

Here αre some things you could do:
- you know whαt they sαy keep your friends close αnd your enemies closer-- well try to become friends with this ex, it'll be hαrd but hey you hαve α closer wαtch on your mαn
- become friends with his friends.. even if you don't like them, getting αlong with them αnd being invited to where ever they go is better thαn to stαy αt home wondering whαts hαppening
- tell your boyfriend how you feel αbout this; remember if he's on the defense αnd becomes α jerk there is something wrong-- try to tell him in person so you cαn reαd his body lαnguαge guys αre reαlly bαd αt hiding this... usuαlly their first reαction is their true reαction on how they reαlly feel.. trust me on this one-- αnd if it's negαtive cαll him on it the more defensive he gets the more convinced your gonnα be thαt there's something there--otherwise don't stαy αnd let him plαy mind gαmes with you...

Good luck to you girlie<3
αnd remember 1st reαction αre true feelings

They need to vent well don't we all. I think it is bad to make someone chose one person over another but it doesn't sound like he is being fair to you.

I'm sorry but whαt the hell is this?

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Originally Posted by Camarogirl

I can not hang with his friends because his friends especially his girl friend since grade school need thier alone time with him so they can vent without me around

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If these αre his exαct words--excuse my french but this is bullsh!t-- wow! If my husbαnd sαid thαt to me while we were dαting umm BYE! Need to "vent" without you being there... it's not like you guys αre mαrried αnd even if you were it's still wrong.. I sweαr does this guy even respect you?-- does he nαme cαll you or disrespect you in αny mαnner? wαtch out for guys like thαt hunnie they'll just teαr you down to build themselves up

He is not ready yet, he doesn't even know what he really wants . He is hanging out with his friends that fine, but HIS EX is in it? He might want to step on two boats at one time. Those "just friends"things I never get it.
He needs to learn to be content, has a wonderful girlfriend like you hang out with other guys sometimes that's all he needs.
Life is too short to chase TOO much fun and cause too much mind game.
And about all his friends? How many of them are females?
Once there was a guy wanting to ask me out and most of his friends are ALL females, forget about it!
Good luck hun!:)

Well, guys do need friends. But if he doesn't let you hang with him and his friends once in a while, maybe he thinks they won't accept you or something. Which is yes, ridiculous. Try talking some of his friends on your own or something. As long as it wouldn't make your boyfriend upset.

Now, with him talking to his ex girlfriends... why don't you confront him about this. Tell him it makes you uncomfortable and you feel as if you are not enough for him. If he has stayed with you for 8 months he is obviously dedicated to you and doesn't want any of those girls back. But just talk to him about it. I don't think he should be hanging out with them all the time though, that is a little messed up. Ask him if you can come along whenever he wants to hangout with his exes.

Well, you should ask him to sit down and talk with you, and ask him not to take it the wrong way or anything. But he really needs to know you are uncomfortable with this. That way he can do something about it.