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-   -   I messed up big time.Pushed too hard. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=114436)

  • Jul 28, 2007, 08:02 PM
    magicraft5
    I messed up big time.Pushed too hard.
    My GF and I have been together for about 6 months, throughout its been good and hard (she had some baggage from past relationships, which we talked about it and worked through). For a while, we had lots of sex ( I still say made love, 'cause we did , feelings and intimacy was all there) Then about a month ago, she just stopped wanting to kiss, cuddle, and of course sex. It was really bothering me, and didn't let her know and just thought it was just a period in time for her. Well, we had sex a few times over the past few weeks, but every once in a while dumbass me would make a few jokes about sex, not knowing that it was really getting on her nerves and pissing her off. Tonight we were talking and just chilling, she cracked a little joke about me "stuffing" her. So, we joked and talked a little longer, and then we were talking about going out and getting food and cooking, and then I said, "And then afterwards I'll show you how to "stuff", just straight up as a joke. She then gets madder than hell, because thats really been pissing her off, etc. I tried to explain that I really didn't know it was making her mad, but she wouldn't have it. I asked her if she just wanted me to leave her alone for a bit, then she said, "Just Go." I was like fine, and then told her to call me later on, sometime. Of course she said no, and told me just to leave, so I did. Now, I'm really pissed at myself and sad, because I done this and pushed her away. We've had a couple of rough spells over the past few months, but we do both love each other and enjoy each other immensely. So, what do I do to fix it... I know I was wrong, and messed up, and I know that we don't need sex to be happy... So can someone help me, with a little ensight on how to fix this..? Thanks...
  • Jul 28, 2007, 09:03 PM
    Ash123
    Just let her cool down.

    In a while if you contact her (she contacting you first is preferable) apologize and then move on to a topic
    That is NOT about sex.

    She is a handful it sounds like... which is exciting for a while and then perhaps a bit tiring.
    (Time will tell if it works for you/her.)
  • Jul 28, 2007, 09:23 PM
    Mathandler1
    Hey magicraft5,

    Just like Ash123 mentions, just give her some time to cool down than flowers and a card and a BIG apology would help. And don't say "Sorry" (over used word). If she does not open the door for you than take a picture of yourself with the flowers and slide it under the door. If there is a next time, try to keep sex out of the conversation... things may come around.. in time. Best of Luck!
  • Jul 29, 2007, 10:27 AM
    talaniman
    Please let her cool off and realise these arguments are not all your fault as she seems temperamental, and has a lot of moods swings that are sudden and unpredictable. You never know what, or when she will go off. You will always be walking on eggshells around her. Sorry some things cannot be fixed, but can only be dealt with. Your choice, so is she worth it? Something to think about.
  • Jul 29, 2007, 01:40 PM
    s_cianci
    I think you ned to take a little time off from this one. Actually you should have started when she first lost interest in the intimacy that you had been previously sharing. Make yourself scarce for a while. She may eventually miss you and come back around. Or she may forget about you and move on, in which case you do the same. Either alternative is better than keeping yourself stuck in the middle of in-between, which is where you are right now.
  • Mar 16, 2008, 03:07 PM
    Grand Chilokar
    If giving her time just doesn't help, be sure to make sure the problem is really the problem your talking about. Have you considered it MIGHT be something else?

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