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My 16 yr old daughter just found out that is she pregnant to guy she only knew two months. He told her that they were not planning this and they are not ready for it. I don't believe that my daughter actually knows what it is going to be like. She thinks this is the greatest thing. I think my daughter needs someone to tell her or show what is like to have a baby.What is like to be a teen mother.
If you know anyone that has a baby, ask the parents if she can take care of that baby for a full day and night. She will realize how time consuming and tiring having a baby is. Realizing that she can't hang out with friends as much anymore, getting up in the middle of the night to feed the baby, etc.
It's a great reality check. :)
How can she POSSIBLY know before having that child?
Babysitting is all well and good, but it's NOT the same as your own child.
The best solution would have been to teach her NOT to get pregnant, but what's done is done.
Now the decision lies in her hands. I highly recommend speaking to your doctor to get some recommendations for counselors that specialize in teen pregnancy. Her choice is difficult, and she will need NON-PARTISAN guidance to help her choose.
OMG she has no idea what she is getting her self into. I was 15 when I had my son. He is 7 now. It was the hardest thing in the world to do. And the hardest thing being her mother is that you can't make her decision for her. Me and my sons father are not together anymore and haven't been since nicholas was about 6 weeks old. Being a single teenage mother is one of the hardest things in the world. You have to finish school or you go no where and what kind of example do you show your child if you're a drop out'? And you have to hold down a job because Kids they are expencive! And you have no childhood anymore. Its gone. You are completely grounded. If she thought about going away to collage or anything like that tell her to kiss that right out the window. Hunny I wish I could have 5 minutes with your little girl so I can tell her what its like because I went though it and I don't regret it because I love my son I just wish I waited because I missed out on A lot of things in live because I went from being a kid to being a 40 scoccer mom. I finished school, went to college and held down a full time job though all of that and took care of my son all by myself. I ended up having to drop out of college because it was too much and now I have to wait until he is older because I can't manage all of that again. If you want I would be more then willing to talk with her and let her know actually how hard this really is...Quote:
Originally Posted by Freakette814
Well, you could find some people who had kids when they were young and have them sit down with your daughter and explain everything: finances, responsibility, relationships, etc. Just show her how it's a reality. Give her more responsibilities around the house (cooking, washing dishes, doing laundry, etc.) and tell her that her life is going to be like that for the rest of her life... non-stop work. Good Luck:)
No matter how much people tell her how hard its going to be, she is never going to understand it until she has to live it herself. I am 20 and had my son when I was 19. Don't get me wrong, he is the best thing that has ever came into my life and he has changed my life so much.. but he is hard work, not to mention the father is not there so it just ME doing all the work. There are days I sit back and think... "I wonder what I would be doing right now if I never got pregnant." I am more than willing to answer any questions she or you might have about anything and more than willing to talk to her. You being a mom yourself I'm sure know most of what she needs to know, but sometimes they listen more when it doesn't come from their parents.:) (it wasn't long ago, I was at the point too)
Best of luck to you and her both!
I'm sorry to hear this, since obviously she has a hard road lying ahead of her (as do you).
Help her start "practicing" to become a parent. Set her alarm clock for every 45 minutes at night so she can practice getting up with the baby. If possible, find someone locally who has been in her situation. She could volunteer to babysit at a women's shelter while they go on job interviews, etc. Planned Parenthood could also provide you with some educational materials that she could read on being a young parent. Perhaps she can borrow one of those mechanical babies for a week. (One night isn't very effective).
Good Luck
I would not do this. You see, as young as she is she is prone to certain complications already and she NEEDS her sleep. So, how is that going to help? It could actually make the situation worse.Quote:
Originally Posted by LearningAsIGo
Parenting is a very tough job and there is no way on the face of the earth that any one of us will teach her that prior to the arrival of the baby. We can prepare all we want, but when this baby comes it will be a different story.
She may choose adoption. There is no way to prepare for the pain and heartache associated with giving up someone that has been so close to her for 9 months.
Look we can talk to this girl till we are blue in the face. But the reality is that she will not completely understand until she EXPERIENCES it. The mind of a 16 year old does not work that way.
Oh trust me, it can be. I was already tired of it after one night :)Quote:
(One night isn't very effective)
That is exactly what I was thinking... there is no way she will ever know or understand it fully until it actually happens to her... it can be the best experience for her, but it is not the right choice. I guess all we can do it try, doing something is better than doing nothing.Quote:
Originally Posted by J_9
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