Ask Me Help Desk - In love but in pain.

In love but in pain.

PLEASE READ THIS PLEASE!!

Im 15 (16 Sept. 3rd) and I have this {wonderfull} boyfriend... I do love him and he says he loves me and he sounds sooo true... did I mention he just ternt 18? Well yha... OK with out real names John and I have been together for about a month now we've dated for almost a year and known each other for 5 years sense he moved here from a place.. But I kind of fell in love w.him (I know Im young) But I do honest and truly... Sounds perfect? Well here's where the pain comes in.. Hes always worried about me cheating on him because his ex was a and she always did.. but he's telling my 12 y.o friend how hot she is and how he likes her more than a friend and he cheated on me w.his exgirlfreind in the beginning of our relationship... Im a very forgiving person... (so you've probably noticed) But He said that he didn't mean it and he loves ME and he won't ever do it again (the friends situation.. ) and he had sex with his ex for a one last time deal because he split up with her for me... When Im with him Im so happy! I don't think about the things he's done... here comes the confusing part... his best friend and I kind of like each other which I mean yha I do but I don't want to date him he's nice and would make a nice b-f and all but I want to be with john even though he did them things... He doesn't want me to tlk to his friends because he knows he likes me... but I do and I know it bothers him but I told him I wasn't giving up a friend and bob (his friend) knows that he is just a friend to. But I don't know what to do about him always saying stuff like that to other girls.. Should I like breakup w.him though I love him? Or should I do the same to him or what because I do beleve he does love me kind of but he is also a guy... I Don't KNOW but it hurts me A lot everythim he does that stuff I mean she's 12!! 6 years diffrence!! 12... 18... 12... 18 and she's not even interested she has a boyfriend!! (yha I know to young blahblahblah) HELP guys and girls!!

First things first - he's trying to hook up with a 12 year old and he's 18? You realize that is not only wrong but that is illegal. This guy sounds like a pedophile. I would cut your losses, walk away and find a boy who is 16 and leave those 18 year old boys alone.

You deserve to have someone be faithful to you and not cheat on you. By cheating on you he is saying you do not matter to me, I'm the only one who matters to me. You deserve to be treated well - you are worth good treatment. You are a special, wonderful girl who deserves someone to treat you as such. Being in a relationship should not make you so sad and stressed out dolly - it should make you feel happy all the time. Please leave this man alone and find a nice boy.

I agree... an 18 year old going for a 12 year old? Stay away from this guy! Far, far far FAR FARRRR away.

Even if she doesn't look or act 12 she could easaly pass as 15 16 probably even 17!! Its crazey! But I really like him even though he can be a ske.eze

Its okay if you like him, you will just have to stay away from him.

And it doesn't matter if a 12 year old girl looks 35 she is still under the age of consent (as are YOU by the way) therefore making ANY sexual contact illegal.

He is a bad, bad guy. Stay far, far away. I'm sure there are plenty of boy your age who are nice and fun.

I want you to understand something really important - this guy is not a "skeeze" he is a PEDOPHILE. Do you know what that is? That is an adult who is attracted to children (which you and this 12 year old are in the eyes of the law) and who engages in sexual acts with kids. This is against the law no matter what you or anyone else looks like. This guy should be in jail not on your list of people to date.

Quote:

Originally Posted by GlindaofOz

Its okay if you like him, you will just have to stay away from him.

And it doesn't matter if a 12 year old girl looks 35 she is still under the age of consent (as are YOU by the way) therefore making ANY sexual contact illegal.

He is a bad, bad guy. Stay far, far away. I'm sure there are plenty of boy your age who are nice and fun.

I want you to understand something really important - this guy is not a "skeeze" he is a PEDOPHILE. Do you know what that is? That is an adult who is attracted to children (which you and this 12 year old are in the eyes of the law) and who engages in sexual acts with kids. This is against the law no matter what you or anyone else looks like. This guy should be in jail not on your list of people to date.

Thank you very much... and yes I know what a pedi is...

Youth should be light hearted about love. You have a long long path in front of you, which leads to a bright future if keep going forward. Don't even think about "love", forget about him... it's a learning experience, any step you take at this moment will be a lesson, my advice is moving on, forget about him, focus on school.hun. At the mean time, make friends and better yourself, respect your parents. Talk to them as well, see what they say about it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by nicespringgirl

Youth should be light hearted about love. U have a long long path in front of you, which leads to a bright future if keep going forward. Don't even think about "love", forget about him...it's a learning exprience, any step you take at this moment will be a lesson, my advice is moving on, forget about him, focus on school.hun. at the mean time, make friends and better yourself, respect ur parents. Talk to them as well, see what they say about it.

My father hates any guy I even think about he's wicked over protective! But my mom said I should dump him but I do like him A lot! Ahhh its so confusing

If you don't mind a side question, Silver, I am from Maine as well. I grew up near Sebago Lake and Portland. Are you anywhere in that area?

LOL, dude, what if you guys happen to live in the same place or close? It'd be interesting to see.:D

Quote:

Originally Posted by nicespringgirl

LOL, dude, what if you guys happen to live in the same place or close? It'd be interesting to see.:D

Well, I live in Chicago now, but it would be interesting if she went to the same schools I went to growing up ;)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Haplo

Well, I live in Chicago now, but it would be interesting if she went to the same schools I went to growing up ;)

Oh yea? What you doing there? Go school?:rolleyes:

Quote:

Originally Posted by nicespringgirl

Oh yea? what you doing there? go school?:rolleyes:

Working, just living life in general. Nothing special :p It's okay here, too much city for me, though. I miss Maine very much :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by nicespringgirl

LOL, dude, what if you guys happen to live in the same place or close? It'd be interesting to see.:D

Oh beleve me it is lol he goes crazey!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Haplo

If you don't mind a side question, Silver, I am from Maine as well. I grew up near Sebago Lake and Portland. Are you anywhere in that area?

Im by Bath (mom) Carabassit vally (dads)

I like Maine ppl's accent, one of my friend was from there:)
Anyway... Silver, how your boyfriend contacts you lately?

Quote:

Originally Posted by SilverRainMixedwTears

Im by Bath (mom) Carabassit vally (dads)

Nice, Bath. Not too far at all :)

[QUOTE=Haplo]Nice, Bath. Not too far at all :)[/

YepYep! Close!

[QUOTE=nicespringgirl]I like Maine ppl's accent, one of my friend was from there:)
Anyway... Silver, how your boyfriend contacts you lately?[/QU

How he contacts me? We see each other he comes to places Im supposed to be annd I leave with him such as I go to the store and he meets me there and we hang out

Quote:

Originally Posted by SilverRainMixedwTears

My father hates any guy i even think about hes wicked over protective!! but my mom said I should dump him but I do like him ALOT!! ahhh its soo confusing

This situation is very unhealthy for you on so many levels, as since your parents are against it, your b/f can end up in jail, yes JAIL. For messing with under aged females. Especially since your sneaking around to be together, not good as this puts him in an even worse situation, contributing to the delinquency of a minor so, at this rate you will be out of high school, before he gets out of jail. Think about it. If you really loved each other so much, you would wait until this was legal, and healthy for you both.:eek: