Ask Me Help Desk

Ask Me Help Desk (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forum.php)
-   Jokes (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=385)
-   -   Canadian Jokes (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=112591)

  • Jul 23, 2007, 06:53 AM
    J_9
    Canadian Jokes
    After the North American Beer Festival, all the brewery
    Presidents decided to go out for a beer. The guy from
    Corona sits down and says, "Hey Senor, I would like the
    world's best beer, a Corona." The bartender dusts off a
    Bottle from the shelf and gives it to him.

    The guy from Budweiser says, "I'd like the best beer in the
    world, give me 'The King Of Beers', a Budweiser." The
    Bartender gives him one..

    The guy from Coors says, "I'd like the only beer made with
    Rocky Mountain spring water, give me a Coors." He gets it.

    The guy from Molson sits down and says, "Give me a Coke."
    The bartender is a little taken aback, but gives him what
    He ordered. The other brewery presidents look over at him
    And ask, "Why aren't you drinking a Molson's?"

    The Molson president replies, "Well, I figured if you guys
    aren't drinking beer, neither would I."

    CANADIAN JOKE #2

    Did you hear about the war between Newfoundland and Nova Scotia?
    The Newfies were lobbing hand grenades; the Nova Scotians
    Were pulling the pins and throwing them back.

    CANADIAN JOKE #3

    In Canada, we have two seasons... six months of winter and
    Six months of poor snowmobiling.

    CANADIAN JOKE #4

    One day an Englishman, an American, and a Canadian walked
    Into a pub together. They proceeded to each buy a pint of
    Labatt Blue. Just as they were about to enjoy their
    Beverages, three flies landed in each of their pints.

    The Englishman pushed his beer away from him in disgust.
    The American fished the offending fly out of his beer and
    Continued drinking it as if nothing happened. The Canadian
    Picked the fly out of his drink and started shaking it over
    The pint, yelling, "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT YOU
    BASTARD!!!"

    CANADIAN JOKE #5

    A Quebecer, staying in a hotel in Edmonton phoned room
    Service for some pepper.

    "Black pepper, or white pepper?" Asked the concierge.

    "Toilette pepper!" Yelled the Quebecer.

    CANADIAN JOKE #6

    An American, a Scot and a Canadian were in a terrible car
    Accident. They were all brought to the same emergency room,
    But all three of them died before they arrived. Just as
    They were about to put the toe tag on the American, he
    Stirred and opened his eyes. Astonished, the doctors and
    Nurses present asked him what happened.

    "Well," said the American, "I remember the crash, and then
    there was a beautiful light, and then the Canadian and the
    Scot and I were standing at the gates of heaven. St.Peter
    approached us and said that we were all too young to die,
    and said that for a donation of $50, we could return to
    earth. So of course I pulled out my wallet and gave him the
    $50, and the next thing I knew I was back here."

    "That's amazing!" Said one of the doctors, "But what
    happened to the other two?"

    "Last I saw them," replied the American, "the Scot was
    haggling over the price and the Canadian was waiting for
    the government to pay his."
  • Jul 23, 2007, 06:58 AM
    talaniman
    Made my day, Thanks
  • Jul 25, 2007, 08:08 PM
    mikezapwnzor
    The first and the last one's where hilarious... thanks
  • Jul 25, 2007, 08:33 PM
    rankrank55
    These are great... I love the first one; my husband thinks when he pops open his Budweiser he's doing such a manly thing, wait till he hears this joke!
  • Jul 25, 2007, 08:40 PM
    saraispiel19
    Hey now...
    Celα n'est pαs drôle:p
  • Jul 26, 2007, 01:39 AM
    benn11
    Ohh, That is cold :D

  • All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:50 AM.