After the North American Beer Festival, all the brewery
Presidents decided to go out for a beer. The guy from
Corona sits down and says, "Hey Senor, I would like the
world's best beer, a Corona." The bartender dusts off a
Bottle from the shelf and gives it to him.
The guy from Budweiser says, "I'd like the best beer in the
world, give me 'The King Of Beers', a Budweiser." The
Bartender gives him one..
The guy from Coors says, "I'd like the only beer made with
Rocky Mountain spring water, give me a Coors." He gets it.
The guy from Molson sits down and says, "Give me a Coke."
The bartender is a little taken aback, but gives him what
He ordered. The other brewery presidents look over at him
And ask, "Why aren't you drinking a Molson's?"
The Molson president replies, "Well, I figured if you guys
aren't drinking beer, neither would I."
CANADIAN JOKE #2
Did you hear about the war between Newfoundland and Nova Scotia?
The Newfies were lobbing hand grenades; the Nova Scotians
Were pulling the pins and throwing them back.
CANADIAN JOKE #3
In Canada, we have two seasons... six months of winter and
Six months of poor snowmobiling.
CANADIAN JOKE #4
One day an Englishman, an American, and a Canadian walked
Into a pub together. They proceeded to each buy a pint of
Labatt Blue. Just as they were about to enjoy their
Beverages, three flies landed in each of their pints.
The Englishman pushed his beer away from him in disgust.
The American fished the offending fly out of his beer and
Continued drinking it as if nothing happened. The Canadian
Picked the fly out of his drink and started shaking it over
The pint, yelling, "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT YOU
BASTARD!!!"
CANADIAN JOKE #5
A Quebecer, staying in a hotel in Edmonton phoned room
Service for some pepper.
"Black pepper, or white pepper?" Asked the concierge.
"Toilette pepper!" Yelled the Quebecer.
CANADIAN JOKE #6
An American, a Scot and a Canadian were in a terrible car
Accident. They were all brought to the same emergency room,
But all three of them died before they arrived. Just as
They were about to put the toe tag on the American, he
Stirred and opened his eyes. Astonished, the doctors and
Nurses present asked him what happened.
"Well," said the American, "I remember the crash, and then
there was a beautiful light, and then the Canadian and the
Scot and I were standing at the gates of heaven. St.Peter
approached us and said that we were all too young to die,
and said that for a donation of $50, we could return to
earth. So of course I pulled out my wallet and gave him the
$50, and the next thing I knew I was back here."
"That's amazing!" Said one of the doctors, "But what
happened to the other two?"
"Last I saw them," replied the American, "the Scot was
haggling over the price and the Canadian was waiting for
the government to pay his."
