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-   -   What should I do (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=112481)

  • Jul 22, 2007, 08:06 PM
    heartbreaker07
    What should I do
    I just started this wonderful guy that has a 3 year old doughter that lives with him.She is nice and loves me, but for some reasons she is like a little brat. My boyfriend and her fights all the time.I feel bad because he tells her to do something and she don't listen and starts crying for no reason.Her mother left when she was one and she don't know who she is. I really want them to get along and he tries to talk to her sweet she just don't understand.. I need help, I feel bad when he yells at her or brings her to her room.
  • Jul 22, 2007, 08:17 PM
    tawnynkids
    You should do nothing. Honestly you are the girlfriend and he is her father. Short of him abusing her it is not your place to get involved, unless he is asking for your help.
  • Jul 22, 2007, 08:31 PM
    sanleg
    3 is a tough age, especially if you don't have a mother in the picture, and by nature, they are usually strong-willed and their behavior is bratty. At 2 and 3 it's there job to push the limits so that they know where they are - as long as he is being consistent, she will get it. But tawnynkids has a good point - Is he asking for your help? If so, then you could help him to look into possibly taking a parenting class in your area - not to be offensive but to give him more tricks in his bag (so to speak). Also, if you are going to be in the picture for a while then it wouldn't hurt for the 2 of you to learn some different parenting skills together. The other thing is that you may be able to learn some of the reasoning behind the behavior - like if she only acts a certain way when you are around - then it might be that she is jealous or afraid of losing the one person that has been stable. Anyway, more skills never hurt any parent - and it might settle down the household a little.
  • Jul 25, 2007, 07:35 PM
    heartbreaker07
    Thank you for taking the time , but no she loves me and when her dad yells at her she comes running to me, and she is fine until she sees him and she she acts like a brat.He is lost too.He goes like she hates me, and he is scared when she grows up she going to leave him and go to her mother that she never had
  • Jul 25, 2007, 07:50 PM
    J_9
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by heartbreaker07
    I just started this wonderful guy

    You mean you just started dating him?

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by heartbreaker07
    for some reasons she is like a lil brat.

    She is 3 for crying out loud. Give her a break!! You think it is easy to have your mother disappear and have another woman come into your life? No, not for a 3 year old.

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by heartbreaker07
    he tells her to do something and she dont listen and starts crying for no reason.

    She is 3, I mean she is THREE!! She is acting like a 3 year old. Three year olds DON'T listen and they DO cry.

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by heartbreaker07
    I really want them to get along

    Not your job.

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by heartbreaker07
    he tries to talk to her sweet she just dont understand..

    Nope, cause she is 3.

    You see, you are the newby in the relationship. It is not your place to fix this problem. May sound harsh, but it is true. He is the parent, not you, there is nothing you can, or should, do about this. Let him handle it.
  • Jul 25, 2007, 09:55 PM
    tawnynkids
    Darn! Have to spread the love J :( Exactly!! You got it, you got it, you got it!

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