My xboyfriend is full of problems. Everything bothers him I tried so hard to help him, but all he does is find things to get upset about. I miss him so much because we did have long conversations and fun together at times . He is part of my soul and with him gone by my choice I feel like part of me is missing.I just can't seem to make him happy as much as I would like him to be happy no matter what I do. I don't even know why he wants me around if he is not going to be happy with me. His problems are mostly created in his head and it would not be hard for him to straighten them out. I feel a deep connection with him and miss him so much. Maybe I should try one more time but of course I have been trying for a year now and he still is unhappy. At first I took his unhappiness personal. I thought if he's not happy than that means that he does not love me because if he loved me he would be happy with me regardless of things going on in his life. I tried to guide him in ways to fix his issues in his life but he just don't seem to want to do it. He would rather take the negative consequences. The negative consequences make him angry at the world including me. All I want to do is see him and I happy together. Should I stick by his side and ride this emotional rollercoaster with him because I love him with all my heart or should I dip out and hopefully I will get over him soon? One more thing I have a 12 year old daughter that hates him because she thinks that he doesn't try in life.

I would certainly re-evaluate this relationship as it sound one sided, and doomed to fail anyway. You can give and hope all you want, but its like running into a brick wall, and will not get better until he takes an active role in working on his own issues. Till that happens your band aid attempts to cover his inadaquacies will drain you, and its not fair all the work you put into this for nothing. Take time to consider the long term affects of his failure to improve himself and you getting the blame.

A man like that will drain you and suck the life out of you. Believe me I am speaking from experience. I am a optimist and my ex was a pessimist and had no ambition to do anything in life (except try to make fast money through poker). He always had these stupid views about the world and how people are horrible and would make himself miserable. Now that I look back, he didn't have much of a personality. He had very few social skills (usually stupid scarcastic jokes were his fortae), he only had made about 4 friends his whole life (he was proud of that because he hated people). He was a loser and dragged me down into his depressive state and misery. I suggested counseling but he didn't want to go because he never thought anything was wrong with him. Suggest counseling to your boyfriend and see if he will go. If your child can pick up on his lack of modivation than there is definantly something wrong. I will tell you one thing, when you meet other guys that are completely opposite to him, is such a breath of fresh air!! :)

I do agree. I already want to let him go and know that things will not change until he wants them to. I know for sure now that I will not jump into a relationship so quick again and give my heart away because this is not fun. I want him out of my head

I don't know your boyfriend, but it seems that he's hurting you with this. If he's really aggressive person I strongly advise against what I'm about to suggest. **U should try to make him choose between giving an effort and fixing his problems.. and.. u. If he doesen't improoves then your relationship is doomed to faliour anyway, not to mention that your daughter doesen't like him.**

Another fix for his problem might be a psychologist. Try to encurage him to go and get help. As a student of psychology I know very well that these types of problems can be solved only with the help of a specialist. All U can do is stand by his side, he needs to WANT to fix his life.

You are right Sam. He is not aggressive. He has said that he wants counceling before. I have offered to take him but he just hasn't got around to it just like everything else.

You said that he feels like he is a part of your soul. I felt like that with my ex, but now I realize the reason why I felt like that is because I was always taking care of him emotionally. As women we have that part of us (I think it's the maternal part) and maybe that's why you felt like he was in your soul. But he was not in your soul for a good reason if you know what I mean.

Be rational! He is lack of ambition a man that lacks of ambition and full of problems are not worth of it. Be rational about it! He needs to learn from life and improve himself. If you are willing to help him that's good but he needs a lot of work done!!

Thanks guys for all your input. I appreciate it. I can't stick by his side. I just called his house for one last try. His sister said that he got picked up by someone last night and has not been home since. SO I guess he's looking for someone new to take over my work that I could not help him with. Maybe he just wanted to use me as an emotional crutch, but I know now that I can not help. Unless he is in the hospital but I doubt it . I will miss him very much,but know that I need to look at myself and see why I alloud my heart to get broken so bad before I date again. Thanks all of you for your help today. You have helped me more than you know.

Good that he's looking for someone else because he's not your problem anymore. That's exactly what he is, a BIG PROBLEM. Its going to be hard, you will have your good and bad days but continue to keep your head up. Your absolutely right, he needed an emotional crutch. But when selfish guys do this, they need to realize that they are involving someone else into their worldwind of mess. Don't let him make you an emotional mess because he wants to act like a leach and throw his emotional problems on to you. You are not his counselor or psychiatrist, and you are definantly not his mother. Guys like him never grow up and continue to drag others down around them. Feel free and realize you are blessed to have him out of your life. Good Luck