Why am I so un-motivated?
Why am I afraid to go to my friend's house?
I can't do anything right.
I'm a disappointment. I'm ugly, shy, I have extremely low self esteem.
I hate myself.
I hate most guy's personalities.
I'm surprised I even have any friends that care about me.
There is nothing good about me.
I can't feel enough confidence in me to even go see my friends.
I feel as though everyone stares at me all the time.
I spend almost my whole life on MSN.
I'm too afraid to go out because I think people will stare at me and call me names.
I'm such a loser.
And I hate going to school because of the people there.
I can hardly have any fun in my life.
I am no where near as good as any other people around me.
I'm pathetic, worthless and a waste of time.
I have been heartbroken and I've thought about committing suicide.
I have cried for hours over something small.
I used to be depressed, I have never cut myself though.
I'm not THAT depressed anymore but I still hate myself.
Why am I like this?
How do I gain self esteem?
How can I have fun with my friends?
Why am I nothing like anybody else?

I am not shallow or anything like that. I have friends but I'm definitely not popular in school. People say I'm nice and everything, but I still hate myself. I'm always nervous around even my best friend, I hate it.

Please help me :(

HEY! PLEASE STOP BEATING YOURSELF UP! THAT IS THE FIRST THING THAT YOU CAN DO! STOP IT! You are making a choice here. It is your choice as to how you view yourself and what you can do. Please concentrate on the good things about you. Turn the "scars into stars" if there are things in your life that have helped to shape the way that you feel about yourself.

Again, it is a choice that you make. It is your choice to think positively or negatively. I would suggest choosing to go "ever onward, ever upward!"

Why are you choosing to think of yourself the way that you do?

Please don't give up! You are worth much more than you think!

Hopefully, others will come along to share their opinions and advice.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by yoitzlisa

Why am I so un-motivated?
why am I afraid to go to my friend's house?
I can't do anything right.
I'm a disappointment. I'm ugly, shy, I have extremely low self esteem.
I hate myself.
I hate most guy's personalities.
I'm surprised I even have any friends that care about me.
there is nothing good about me.
I can't feel enough confidence in me to even go see my friends.
I feel as though everyone stares at me all the time.
I spend almost my whole life on MSN.
I'm too afraid to go out because I think people will stare at me and call me names.
I'm such a loser.
and I hate going to school because of the people there.
I can hardly have any fun in my life.
I am no where near as good as any other people around me.
I'm pathetic, worthless and a waste of time.
I have been heartbroken and I've thought about committing suicide.
I have cried for hours over something small.
I used to be depressed, I have never cut myself though.
I'm not THAT depressed anymore but I still hate myself.
why am i like this?
how do i gain self esteem?
how can i have fun with my friends?
why am I nothing like anybody else?

I am not shallow or anything like that. I have friends but I'm definately not popular in school. People say I'm nice and everything, but I still hate myself. I'm always nervous around even my best friend, I hate it.

please help me :(

---

Lison how do you expect to have a hight self esteem if your beating yourself up like that?? its not about being popular all the time you have to undersand that your beautiful in side and out and of course there going to be some problems hear and there and nobodys perfect some people think there popular just because there hair is in place and there clothes are the best and everyone adores them but that's not everything... don't hate yourself you are here to be you and only you!! don't harm yourself I want to know how to gain selfesteem well you need to love yourself it doesn't matter if your not the best of the best be you have fun... &&there has to be a reson your nervous what's on your mind? is anything bothering you that bad?? please talk to me I want to help!! my names andrea please write back.

I have the same problem as you. And I know that the first two answers to your problem don't help. If the "you're beautiful inside" thing applies to everyone, then it's really the "you're completely average inside" thing isn't it. I don't have an answer for your problem, I justed wanted to point out the crucial flaw in their solutions.

Sounds to me like it's possibly either a hormonal imbalance or a chemical imbalance. Get a checkup just to make sure there is no underlying medical problem that may be the cause of this.

I feel the same way as you yoitzlisa on just about everything you said, I'm depressed a lot and have been for the past 2-3 years. I feel like my life is a waste. My only motivation to get good grades in school is so my mom will stop talking to me about how education is so important.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by SpawnOfAzazel

Sounds to me like it's possibly either a hormonal imbalance or a chemical imbalance. Get a checkup just to make sure there is no underlying medical problem that may be the cause of this.

---

I agree with this post. Sometimes the meds are bad, though. Try them, I did. I'm not sure if they helped me or not because I was so infrequent with them. After I completely stopped taking them, I felt really horrible for a few days. Further proof that the chemicals in your brain really affect your mood - and in turn affect your thoughts.

I had the same problem! But do NOT beat yourself up! I remember writing some sort of list like that in my own notebooks around 5 years ago. The year of 2007 has been the best in my life so far (it could be better). I'm now 18. My life is not perfect but I don't focus on that in any way whatsoever because I have goals and feel good about them. Sometimes I feel horrible, and I think it has to do with a hormonal problem because I feel fine most other times.

If you feel deep down that there are things you don't know, that you feel you should know... seek for the answers. I know you might question what your purpose here is. You can find that purpose, just follow your intuition on what to ask, and where to look. Seriously. The internet actually helped me in large amounts.

Can I recommend that you watch the movie/documentary called "The Secret"? Go watch it, it's the perfect motivational tool. Keep your mind open!

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by yoitzlisa

Why am I so un-motivated?
why am I afraid to go to my friend's house?
I can't do anything right.
I'm a disappointment. I'm ugly, shy, I have extremely low self esteem.
I hate myself.
I hate most guy's personalities.
I'm surprised I even have any friends that care about me.
there is nothing good about me.
I can't feel enough confidence in me to even go see my friends.
I feel as though everyone stares at me all the time.
I spend almost my whole life on MSN.
I'm too afraid to go out because I think people will stare at me and call me names.
I'm such a loser.
and I hate going to school because of the people there.
I can hardly have any fun in my life.
I am no where near as good as any other people around me.
I'm pathetic, worthless and a waste of time.
I have been heartbroken and I've thought about committing suicide.
I have cried for hours over something small.
I used to be depressed, I have never cut myself though.
I'm not THAT depressed anymore but I still hate myself.
why am i like this?
how do i gain self esteem?
how can i have fun with my friends?
why am I nothing like anybody else?

I am not shallow or anything like that. I have friends but I'm definately not popular in school. People say I'm nice and everything, but I still hate myself. I'm always nervous around even my best friend, I hate it.

please help me :(

---

Hi, I'm new to this post. I just wanted to let you know, I'm going through similar circumstances with my 18 year old daughter. I started her on Vitamin B complex and she seems to be getting better. I know that sounds lame or a promo for Vitamins, but I've taken her to therapy and they've even prescribed anti-depressants, which turn her into a Zombie state (depletes her spirit). I'm slowly seeing her big beautiful smile. That means the world to me.
I wanted to point out that you seem to be quite bright. You're writing is quite intelligent, clear and concise. You want to help yourself, it shows by your posting, and I believe that is the first step to getting better. Look at the wonderful advice you're getting from the people that have posted.

Write down twenty things that you like about yourself. I will help with the first ones (things I like about you, things you may not realize you project).

I am a good writer.
I express myself well.
I am a good speller.
I am very in touch with myself and my feelings.
I reach out to others for feedback.
I am insightful.
I am very analytical.
I am smart and can talk about many subjects.
I am empathetic.

Ok, now it's your turn.

Wow, reading this from a young person frightens me.

I am 56 years old and have gone through a lot in my life. I have also, for many times in my 20's, 30's up to now felt the very same way. Fortunately, I have grown to understand myself and realize that not all things will get better.

I can see from an older person's point of view that when he/she is no longer 'needed' by anyone that they will get very depressed about it.

When this started for me in my 20's it was very hard and I did think about suicide a lot. Thank goodness it did not go that far. During that time there were no antidepressants either.

My big step was seeking therapy (which at that time was not the in-thing to do either,) so I kind of had to sneak to the clinic for fear that someone would think I was 'crazy'

I noticed myself that nutrition and alcohol had a bit to do with my 'mood changes'. I still call them mood changes because they crop up on me now and then today.

So, the moral of this story is... hand in there, I did it and you can do it if you want to.

Find yourself among friends that give you confidence. Take compliments for what they are and don't be ashamed to appreciate those compliments. Stay away from the negative influence as much as possible. And it's OK to be upset and angry about life sometimes.

Get back with us and don't give up.

http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/15/15_9_16.gif

Please seek the help of a professional, you sound terribly depressed. You might have had a sad childhood, which led you to feel like you feel. You have gotten great advise by the others here. You might want to read self help books, like "You are what you think", or "Healing the shame that binds you". There are so many. When I was a teenager, I had thoughts like yours, but not as harsh. Since I was often called bad names and insulted by my parents, I thought I was ugly. It was not until I was on my late twenties that I realized why I had modeled and participated in beauty pageants. I could never win, because my confidence was flawed. When I was a teenager I use to pray so much and that helped. Try prayer, or talking to grandma, if you have one. Grandma's are always so helpful.

Well done is what I can say to you. You have done something amazing. Not everyone can do it. You have tried and succeeded as a start to alter how you feel. Keep trying, keep thinking good tings you must have so far thought some to move forward . You can do it. Your personality will improve and you will become a stronger person if you try

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

Write down twenty things that you like about yourself. I will help with the first ones (things I like about you, things you may not realize you project).

I am a good writer.
I express myself well.
I am a good speller.
I am very in touch with myself and my feelings.
I reach out to others for feedback.
I am insightful.
I am very analytical.
I am smart and can talk about many subjects.
I am empathetic.

Ok, now it's your turn.

---

Just wanted to let you know this was a very good answer sometimes people can't see the good in themselves and just a few kind words from someone can really turn someone's life around