My boyfriend is in the army and we have been together for nearly 5 years and quite often when he comes home at a weekend he always says he is not in the mood or too tired for sex today was the last day we se en each other before I go on holiday on Friday with my friends and he still didn't have sex with me. What is wrong with me he says I make him feel pressured into having sex even though I hardly say anything. This is making me feel really insecure about myself and as if he just doesn't fancy me anymore he says he loves me more than anything an doesn't see this as an issue please help me alex

He really just might be too tired. My husband is in the Navy and when he used to come home from being out to sea he didn't want to have sex right away either.

Being in the military is very straining and tiring. When will he get leave for more than a weekend? He probably just needs time to rest :)

Thanks for your answer he is on leave for 3 weeks soon he says that he does find me attractive still and still loves me I think as a woman I just think other reasons to why he never wants sex. He gets angry with me for saying it too. Xx

During that 3 week leave period it will probably happen. Just give him time to rest. He is probably just very tired.

Next time he comes home for a weekend, pamper him a little. Give him a massage, run him a warm bath, stuff like that. Trust me, he will be very grateful! :)

Thanks for your help I just won't say anything and maybe it will happen when I get back of holiday. Thanks

You're welcome :) Saying nothing about it might actually get you somewhere. If he doesn't feel like he is obligated to do it, he might just surprise you!

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Originally Posted by Mathandler1

Maybe he needs a cold one or wine to relax him. I used to be in the Army myself, many moons ago and when I came home from a long outing, the onlything I could think of was sex or making love to my wife. Of course we are now divorces because my wife at the time could not handle me being gone and found others to be with her and please her sexually. There could be many reasons but I cannot think of any more inportant than making love too by wife after being gone a while. Maybe seeing a sex therapist maybe in need here...I am no expert. And maybe I am a horney big devil...who knows. Sorry I could not be too much help, but using the military for an EXCUSE is not right for not having sex...in my book.

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I never said the military was an excuse, I said being tired was an excuse. Do you have sex when you are dog tired on a normal basis? If you do, you are superman.. lol. When I'm tired, I sleep.

He is probably genuinely tired and stressed. Give him some time when he returns and don't worry about... let it happen in the lust of things. Like star said, pamper him when her returns and give him words of affirmation. Treat him like a king and he will begin to feel like one!

The only thing I can think of besides him being too tired and stressed.. is this. Think about how hard it is for him to be away from the person he loves for long periods with the possibility of him being killed. I'm sure it's hard for him, and doing anything sexually will most likely just make it harder for him when he does have to leave again. It's stressful. Good luck, I'm sure everything will work out fine, ciao :)