Ok for some reason my girlfriend doesn't like kissing and I don't know how to handle that. To me it's the biggest sign off affection on a daily basses. She says hugs are a sign and this is true but you hug your friends. Kissing is more personal. This is kind of a stupid post I know but I'm lost. And to get it out of the way, I do make sure my breath is the best I could be when I know I'm going to be around her, I've had no problems previously, meaning I'm not a lousy kisser, and she's told me I'm not (and she's the type who would tell me if I was). I don't know what to do and its bothering me more than it should. Suggestions on how to handle it? Other ideas of affection?

How old are you, how old is she?

How many guys has she kissed prior to you?

Me 17
Her 16

She's gone out w/ a few other guys before me

Were any of those other guys bad experiences by chance?

How long before her last break up did she start seeing you?

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Originally Posted by frost0234

Ok for some reason my girlfriend doesn't like kissing and i don't know how to handle that. to me its the biggest sign off affection on a daily basses. she says hugs are a sign and this is true but u hug your friends. kissing is more personal. this is kinda a stupid post i kno but I'm lost. and to get it out of the way, i do make sure my breath is the best i could be when i kno I'm gonna be around her, I've had no problems previously, meaning I'm not a lousy kisser, and shes told me I'm not (and shes the type who would tell me if i was). I don't know what to do and its bothering me more than it should. suggestions on how to handle it? other ideas of affection?

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You kissed this girl before but now she does not want to kiss?

Maybe she is not really with you but with somebody else? It is a possibility. I am not saying for sure, but that is the first thought in my mind.

Kissing is a major sign of affection, if this person was affectionate before and not anymore. There are problems for sure.

Joe

Do you know if she was like this with the other guys?

If she had no problem kissing other guys before you, I also think she's using you for something. Money, kindness, companionship, I can't tell you exactly what, but it's something to keep interested but without the commitment.

Her last breakup was about 3 months before we started. In the beginning we would kiss a little and less and less and around there she told me she doesn't like it but does it anyway because she knows I like it. But she rarely does if anything. I'm pretty sure its not another guy because she's bad at keeping secrets and keeping things from me. If there was another guy id know because all her friends have huge mouths. I know she's kissed as much w/ the others as w/ me.

To my knowledge, she was the same way and hasn't liked kissing all her life. I'm pretty sure she's not using me because we've had little fights and at one point I was going to break it off with her and she fought so hard to win me back.

I'm just having a harder and harder time with it lately

Frost re read all your posts.

Do you personally want to be with somebody that can not commit?

That does not know how to show affection. Obviously there are problems here or you would not have wanted to break up with her.

Hope you figure things out and your not really to sure what she was like before but it is obvious that there are real issues here.

It is up to you whether you really want to continue feeling this way knowing that somebody your with you personally will never experience kissing with you because they do not like it.

Do you feel that eventually she will come around or since you said she is like this with every other person she was with. How is this time going to be any different?

It is your choice and decision to make but you need to get to the root of the issue and if it continues I think you know what you need to do.

Joe

Have you considered that she may just be too young?

I remember my first make-out session at 16 and that I found it kind of gross to have somebody's tongue in my mouth. Two years later it was a totally different story.

Does she think that she maybe can't kiss and is worried that she isn't doing it right its also the way you kiss if your slinging you toung down her throute that might put her off specialy if you going round like a washing machine I know that's something that puts me off. Kiss her sometime on her cheek or top forehead I think there little signs of affection that she will see and if your not forcing her to kiss you on the lips then maybe she will see that. But do ask her if she has worries and talk about it.

She wants no part of it, forehead, cheek, nothing. Ill just see what happens thanks for all your help everyone.

I think she just wants to say she is going with someone.

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Originally Posted by talaniman

I think she just wants to say she is going with someone.

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I'm being totally serious and not trying make a joke or disrespect you. But maybe she's a lesbian, but like Tal says she wants people to think she is going with someone. She has you essentially as a friend with no other attachments and no romance while opporsing her lesbian tendencies. She's still young enough where she might want her parents to think she's straight and I'm sure she doesn't want to be teased at school, so you could provide the perfect cover for her.

It might be because she thinks your being too pushy or she's not ready yet. I go through this with my boyfriend sometimes because he likes to kiss all the time. But eventually she'll get used to it. Give her some time:) how long have you been going out?

5 months now

Frost... are you having sex with her? Is it just the kissing that is the issue? Does she seem into you? I question the whole lesbian theory...