I need advice. I am trying not to get TOO excited because it might not even happen. I e-mailed my son a week ago- did not think I would get a reply, but decided to give it a shot. I asked him just how long he plans on punishing me by not having anything to do with me. I e-mailed him from work. I took a vacation day Friday, and when I got to work this morning there was an e-mail from him! I almost fell off my chair. Don't remember the exact words, but he more or less said that he did not have a specific timetable, and if I really wanted to talk to him he would think about it. He does not think it will accomplish anything though. Like I said, I am kind of excited- did not even think I would get a reply! But I'm trying to keep in mind that he may just e-mail me that he thought about it and decided against it. I need advice- it has been almost a year... he wanted to know what I wanted- I told him that he is my son and I want him to know I will always be here, and I miss him and love him and think we need communication. I am also kind of scared to death- if it DOES happen, what do I say? I'm afraid of saying the wrong thing. He sometimes gets very touchy- I once told him (jokingly) that if he and his girlfriend ever broke up, she would come live with me- and he got offended. I only wanted to let him know how much I love her, and when my mother in law said the same thing to me, I thought it was funny. Any advice?:) :confused:

I think that you need to be supportive of your son. Even if you were joking about his girlfriend coming to live with you, by you doing that, it tells me that there must be some animosity between you and your son.

What exactly has happened between you and your son to have him not speak with you in almost a year? It would be helpful to know that. I don't really think that you are giving us the whole picture here of what has happened between you and him.

Call him or write him a letter. Tell him what is in your heart. If he thinks that you are wanting something, then don't speak or write about wanting anything. Just speak or write about caring for him and letting him know that you are always there if he needs you. The choice that he makes is up to him.

I am hopeful that others will share their good insights and advice to what you have posted.

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Originally Posted by Clough

I think that you need to be supportive of your son. Even if you were joking about his girlfriend coming to live with you, by you doing that, it tells me that there must be some animosity between you and your son.

What exactly has happened between you and your son to have him not speak with you in almost a year? It would be helpful to know that. I don't really think that you are giving us the whole picture here of what has happened between you and him.

Call him or write him a letter. Tell him what is in your heart. If he thinks that you are wanting something, then don't speak or write about wanting anything. Just speak or write about caring for him and letting him know that you are always there if he needs you. The choice that he makes is up to him.

I am hopeful that others will share their good insights and advice to what you have posted.

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I don't think you have read my entire post, but here goes: last year- July 4th weekend to be exact, my son was making jello shots in preparation for a show he was going to that night. He and I were talking and laughing and having a good time listening to some of Dylan's older stuff. Then his sister got mad at him because he ate the lunch meat she had bought for herself. One thing led to another, and he went downstairs and cranked up his stereo. We asked that he turn it down. It got louder and he started singing along- loudly. He came upstairs- we were in the kitchen. Words were exchanged between him and his stepfather. He ended up pushing me and I fell. While he was downstairs, the cops showed up. He had called them, saying he was afraid something might happen. They arrested him for pushing me. He and his girlfriend ended up living with her father. I did send him letters, at Christmas I showed up at Chili's (they both were working there) and gave him a nice card and $50. He was mad because it was so very busy. They have since moved into their own apartment, and he has cut off all contact. I have no way to talk to him let alone see him- he has a different job. The only way I can get in touch with him is e-mail- and I have no idea if he will even answer me. I know this is lengthy, and I apologize, but I get the feeling you did not read my entire original post (which is even longer!)... I have always been supportive, and as I told him in my e-mail when he asked what I wanted, I told him that I wanted him to know that I have always and will always be there for him- he is my son, and family is everything- I love him and I miss him.

I think all you can do at this point really is just express how you feel.. how much you want to be apart of his life. Everything in your heart since the only contact you have is through email I guess that is all you can do.. is email him and let him know..

Her daughter here. Clough - she didn't realize she posted this in a different thread than her other question. :)