Ask Me Help Desk

I tried to kill myself a few months ago, I was in the hospital for a month all because I was broken hearted, I am 14 years old and I feel there is no reason to live anymore. I don’t believe anyone when they say they care, I have over 56 self inflected burns on my arm,
I know my girl friend loves me, and people would miss me if I killed myself, but its so hard to care anymore I have been looking at this bottle of Prozac for a week now, the first time I tried and had a over dose, as you can tell it didn’t work, I want to jump off a bridge so I don’t have to feel this way anymore, I feel like no one understands, if they do its so hard to believe someone else knows this pain, I am so tired of crying every time I’m alone, I don’t want to get a job and make money, I’m sick and tired of buying marijuana to numb my pain, I have nothing when I think about it…. I am so serious about this, I want to die more then I want to be a billionaire, I’m going to end up addicted to crack or cocaine if I live I just know it, life is nothing but a test and I failed like everything else, I don’t want pity or people to feel for me, I just hope my mom can find this if I kill myself.
I hope someone can help me so bad :(

Please call the national Hope Line at 1-800-SUICIDE. (1-800-784-2433)

I understand what you are going through. I too, struggled with depression.

That line can help save you.

Please... your life is worth living. I know that right now, it doesn't seem that way. I've been there! I too was hospitalized as a teenager for attempted suicide.

Please... keep in touch with your doctor, and do the things they tell you to do for now. Right now, your depression is running your life. YOU can run your life, eventually. It's tough, and it's a long road at times, but there are people who love you, and people (even strangers like myself!) who care that you live.

Please... don't give up.

Are you still there Rjsmc? I know it's a common response, but I know what you're going through. I'm 19 years old and I've been inflicting harm on myself since I was 13 or 14. Attempted suicide 4 or 5 times and 2 of them were real tries in which only a miracle kept me from dying. I'm still not happy, I tried to kill myself two months ago but it wasn't a real suicide attempt.

I know what you mean by not having anyone to talk to. I've been the same all my life, extreme feelings of constant loneliness. Just wanting to sit down and have someone to talk to. To 'connect' but I've never connected except on rare occasions which end too soon. You can try to get used to the loneliness, I have for a long time. But the shields you make break too easily. And weed helps for a while but it won't really help you in the long run. I used to smoke frequently but now apart from psychedelics I'm off drugs. I even thought about taking heroin regularly, just because it would make life bearable.. but drugs don't solve anything, though they can certainly help. But you have to help yourself. I could go on and on but..

I want you to know I can relate to what you're feeling like SO much! I wish I could visit you in person and we'd sit down and have a long talk or smoke a joint together in peace and silence. Lol.

I've been feeling like you are for so long now. What about your girlfriend? Can't you really 'talk' to her? You should try spending more time with her and enjoy your time with her.

If you want you can talk to me. Email me or add me on msn messenger.

I hope you're still here. Don't decide yet to have a crack or coke habit in the future. You have too much to experience, too much life to live yet.

Peace and love

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rjsmc

I tried to kill myself a few months ago, I was in the hospital for a month all because I was broken hearted, I am 14 years old and I feel there is no reason to live anymore. I don’t believe anyone when they say they care, I have over 56 self inflected burns on my arm,
I know my girl friend loves me, and people would miss me if I killed myself, but its so hard to care anymore I have been looking at this bottle of Prozac for a week now, the first time I tried and had a over dose, as you can tell it didn’t work, I want to jump off a bridge so I don’t have to feel this way anymore, I feel like no one understands, if they do its so hard to believe someone else knows this pain, I am so tired of crying every time I’m alone, I don’t want to get a job and make money, I’m sick and tired of buying marijuana to numb my pain, I have nothing when I think about it…. I am so serious about this, I want to die more then I want to be a billionaire, I’m going to end up addicted to crack or cocaine if I live I just know it, life is nothing but a test and I failed like everything else, I don’t want pity or people to feel for me, I just hope my mom can find this if I kill myself.
I hope someone can help me so bad :(

I am in a sort of same sitituation. I have depression.tried hurting myself. I was diognosed with a bad depression. I tried killing myself. I lost my father when i was 11 years old ever since then i am depressed. i take prozac. not sure if its helping because ive been feeling like i dont want to be here anymore. like no one cares wat i do. I dont feel loved soemtimes. & i feel like if i try something it new it always ends up being ruined. i am trying to become an actress but having depression is hard. my moods change alot & i get sad alot. people this week have been saying that i have changed. saying that something is changing about me. I dont know who i am anymore sometimes..

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rjsmc

I tried to kill myself a few months ago, I was in the hospital for a month all because I was broken hearted, I am 14 years old and I feel there is no reason to live anymore. I don’t believe anyone when they say they care, I have over 56 self inflected burns on my arm,
I know my girl friend loves me, and people would miss me if I killed myself, but its so hard to care anymore I have been looking at this bottle of Prozac for a week now, the first time I tried and had a over dose, as you can tell it didn’t work, I want to jump off a bridge so I don’t have to feel this way anymore, I feel like no one understands, if they do its so hard to believe someone else knows this pain, I am so tired of crying every time I’m alone, I don’t want to get a job and make money, I’m sick and tired of buying marijuana to numb my pain, I have nothing when I think about it…. I am so serious about this, I want to die more then I want to be a billionaire, I’m going to end up addicted to crack or cocaine if I live I just know it, life is nothing but a test and I failed like everything else, I don’t want pity or people to feel for me, I just hope my mom can find this if I kill myself.
I hope someone can help me so bad :(

Stay.

I'll talk to you, if it's all right. I feel the same way too. I'm 38. Been going through it since I was 13.

Sometimes it's better, right? Sometimes it's worse though. And sometimes it's really hard.

Just hold on a little bit longer. You have to fight it. Please keep wounds clean and not infected.

You are loved. Please talk some more. What's going on right now?

"I don't know who to talk to anymore."

Try sitting in front of a mirror and giving yourself a good talking to. Like the other responders, I have been there too but I discovered it didn't have to be that bad. Take the Prozac the way it was meant to be taken - it's great stuff! Just give it a chance, it takes about three weeks for it to get into your system. Just give it a chance.

You know, the truth is that no one can fix you. Only you can get yourself out of this deep dark pit. Do it and do it now! Otherwise, a few years from now, you are going to discover that you are happy and you are going to be so pissed off at all the time you wasted being miserable.

PLEASE TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF. There are many people that love you, family friends, YOUR GIRLFRIEND.
Two of my friends have killed themselves and I miss them soooo much. One almost did, and now he is doing so much better. He changed his life.
I know you can do it too. Think about yourself, your goals, try talking to your girlfriend about it. I'm sure she'll always be there for you.
PLEASE talk to your parents or even your counceler at school.
Death is not the answer. You have so much life ahead of you, don't let it go to waste.
Take Care and Please don't do anything else to hurt yourself. People that love you can feel the pain too!