Ask Me Help Desk - My son is out of control at daycare!

Hi there...
My three year old (almost 4) son is out of control at daycare and I am at the end of my rope. He has been hitting, biting, and spitting on his "classmates" and teachers, throwing toys, getting angry and very aggressive and definitely not using his "listening ears" as they call it. I have tried to discipline him at home for it, i.e losing his toys and having to earn them back by being a good boy at daycare, but that only worked the first time and only long enough for him to get his toys back.
Let me also mention that he does NOT do these things at home. I am a very strict mom and I don't let much fly. We have rules and he general follows them (no, I am not saying he is a perfect little angel at home, but he only needs a look or warning most of the time) When I ask him why he doesn't behave, he tells me he doesn't like a specific teacher, but he acts out when she is not there too...
I really don't know what else to do and they are starting to suggest I let them bring in somebody to "evaluate" him. I do not know how I feel about someone who does not know my child coming to watch him for an hour or two and throwing a label on him, I'm not sure this will help.
I would be grateful for any suggestions

Quote:

Originally Posted by jaydensmommy24

Hi there....
My three year old (almost 4) son is out of control at daycare and I am at the end of my rope. He has been hitting, biting, and spitting on his "classmates" and teachers, throwing toys, getting angry and very aggressive and definitely not using his "listening ears" as they call it. I have tried to discipline him at home for it, i.e losing his toys and having to earn them back by being a good boy at daycare, but that only worked the first time and only long enough for him to get his toys back.
Let me also mention that he does NOT do these things at home. I am a very strict mom and I don't let much fly. We have rules and he general follows them (no, I am not saying he is a perfect little angel at home, but he only needs a look or warning most of the time) When I ask him why he doesn't behave, he tells me he doesn't like a specific teacher, but he acts out when she is not there too...
I really don't know what else to do and they are starting to suggest I let them bring in somebody to "evaluate" him. I do not know how I feel about someone who does not know my child coming to watch him for an hour or two and throwing a label on him, I'm not sure this will help.
I would be greatful for any suggestions

I think they DO need to have him evaluated... now before he gets further behind. As far as lables... sometimes they apply, and someone without an emotional attachment a parent has... may see things you won't.

It may well be he has issues being separated from you and feels this is a way to get back home. *( wild guess)

But you took toys away once and it worked, so when it started you took toys away again correct, so at this point and time he has no toys at all at home to play with ?

@ smoothy: I thought about that too, that's why I said I don't know how I feel about it. I have however given them my permission to let them have him evaluated. I am also going to ask his doctor at his next check up about the possibility of him having ADHD, once again I don't want him labeled, however I was diagnosed with it as a child and I feel like I am seeing a lot of the things I did when I felt like I wasn't getting enough attention/ I was bored!

@Fr_Chuck: He says he likes going to daycare and seeing/ playing with all his friends. He also has no problem when I leave him, half the time I don't even think he notices, because he goes straight to playing with his friends. The teachers have said that they have asked him if he would like to go home and he says no... He also gets kind of grumpy when I have a short day at work and pick him up early. And as far as the toys go he currently has his bear to sleep with and one of his trucks. He is not allowed to watch TV (which I guess isn't a huge punishment since we don't do much of that anyway) and we have not gone to the park or anywhere else "fun". He still has his books and we still do our "fun" learning activities and we still go outside (in the yard) because I don't see how taking away the educational items and "physical exercise" is going to help.