Nothing helps my mental health
I am looking for opinions on my situation and/or possible steps I can take to improve it. Please do not suggest a lifestyle change or tell me it is all in my head. I have tried living a healthy active lifestyle, but it has never made a difference. I have also tried many natural substances.
I am 24 year old female and I have been dealing with mental health from around the age of 12. It first began with typical depression and during the winter season, I began to get the SADS. I used a Panasonic sunlight to help treat the SADS, typically with no improvement. During the summer months I felt normal again besides the depression. When I was 14 my SADS never went away and I sunk into and even deeper depression. I began to get anxiety issues as well. I started seeing counsellors and getting tested for multiple issues and was diagnosed with depression and anxiety. One day when I was 15, a sudden feeling of exhaustion and foggyiness hit me. I remember the moment it happened, I was sitting in science class. The feeling is almost as if everything is dark and all of my senses are dulled, almost like a crappy high. Like there is a constant white noise/fuzzy TV going on in my head, but only it's a feeling. It comes hand in hand with me being extremely lethargic and tired. I have never been able to properly describe it and don't expect anyone to understand. But it has been the most frustrating part of all of this. No matter what I do, I am always so exhausted. From the age of 15, I was put on birthcontrol (for hormone therapy) and antidepressants. I have taken breaks from medications and tried alternate sources of treatments, but being on no medication is torturous. I have been poked and prodded more times than I could possibly remember, with no results of anything physically wrong. A couple of years ago, maybe even 3, I suddenly got a burst of energy and motivation. I went out of the bar for the first time and started going out every weekend and made lots of friends. I never really had any friends since high school as it's too exhausting. So for about 10 months I was this reckless ball of energy. Although I still felt extremely tired and had this constant feeling in my head, along with the depression and anxiety. Either way it was extremely out of character for me. After the 10 months I crashed hard. I had a major mental breakdown and I was no longer able to work. I began having panic attacks daily and had no motivation to do anything. I never really had motivation before that year, but this was different. When I tried working, I was so slow and it was almost physically impossible. I used to be a fast paced worker and would go above and beyond. I had to go on income assistance and I am now on disabilty. Due to that, my doctor had me see new specialists and they determined that I have bipolar disorder type 2, borderline personality disorder and generalized anxiety disorder. According to them my sudden burst of energy was me being in a state of Hyper-mania. And then I crashed into hypo-mania. I am currently in DBT and on medications for bipolar disorder. They do not really help and neither has any other medication. I guess I have been on 1 medication that made that foggy feeling go away for a week, but that's it. After that week the medication did more harm than good and created symptoms of psychosis and other issues, but it made it so I thought those problems were normal. I am pretty positive I do have bipolar disorder as I have many symptoms and it runs very strongly on both sides of my family. But because nothing has ever helped this feeling I feel like something else is wrong. The next medication I am going on is lithium, which is the only medication that ever worked for my grandma. So I am hoping that will make a difference.
I am hoping there is someone with a similar situation who can reply or to even know if anyone has experienced that foggy feeling I have.