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-   -   22, last interest was when I was 15, is there something wrong? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=231758)

  • Jun 28, 2008, 01:33 PM
    tami1985
    22, last interest was when I was 15, is there something wrong?
    So I'm 22 years old now, and its been 7 years since I have actually liked anyone. I tell people I do not want a relationship because good relationships do not exist (which I think on some levels is true) but deep down I still hope to find companionship.

    I do find some guys attractive but I don't really do anyting about it and most of the time the attraction is just physical. I haven't been asked out for a while now so I'm getting scared (I would ask a guy out if I liked him, but I just haven't found a person that made me want to do that).

    I'll be turning 23 soon, and I wonder why didn't I say yes to the guys that have asked me out. Its not that I didn't like them, but I guess I just wanted to be their friend and nothing more. I really do not want to settle, I want to like someone and not just be in a relationship because I'm scared I'll be alone. Is there really a person out there for everyone? Are my expectations just too high? Should I just give people a chance and in that give me a chance?
  • Jun 28, 2008, 01:49 PM
    victoria_mitchell
    Why rush into something you are still young and when Mr. Right comes along at least you won't have to tell him that you have slept with everyone you know like most girls your age do. You didn't say yes to those guys because you know they are not right for you. I garentee that there is a someone out there for you and I am sure that fate will bring you to him when the timing is appropriate.
  • Jun 28, 2008, 02:30 PM
    talaniman
    Don't think of it in terms of a relationship, just think about doing fun things with fun people. Then there is no pressure to behave in anything but a fun, friendly manner. See a fun guy, ask him to something you can both enjoy. Living life, and enjoying people, and activities, is what its about, and the rest can happen anytime. Don't sweat the small stuff, get out and enjoy yourself.
  • Jun 29, 2008, 11:10 PM
    tami1985
    Thanks for the input. Deep down I know nothing is wrong, I'm happy with the way things are right now. If is happen its happens.
  • Jun 29, 2008, 11:44 PM
    Nestorian
    K, so I'm 23 too, I'm a guy and I have th same situation. Though, I've gone places you haven't, but I know better now. There is nothing worng with you, you are just enjoying what you have, and it doesn't seem that any one will really enjoy it with you, and or is what you want. I try not to let my fear of ending up alone push me into things but I do, I don't regret them however, because with out them, I'd never have learned, even if they are harsh, cold, and painful. THe past is history, the future is a mystery, and the now is a gift, that is why it's called a present.

    Mind you the hardest part of being just friends with some one is, that they don't usually want to hand out with you, if you don't want to do stuff. I'm sure there are thoughs out there who are nice and just want to have fun, experience life, and be just friends, but they are very few and far between. Never easy feeling like you're the only one, just take comfort in knowing that you are not alone, ever.

    Out of curiosity why do you think good relationships do not exist? I know they do, but not really how people think, for nothing can be perfect, which reminds me of a poem about how nothing good can last forever, something about "nothing gold can stay... only an hour so a day" or something like that.

    May peace be with you my friend.
  • Jun 30, 2008, 04:18 AM
    N0help4u
    Have friends no pressures. You might not go out with guys that ask you because maybe you have standards and goals and don't see that in any of the guys that ask you out.
    Think Quality not quantity and be happy with your freedom. Someday the one you are waiting on will show up. Don't be too picky though.
  • Jun 30, 2008, 04:42 AM
    Distantlove
    I have a friend who is 32 and is still just having fun because she is happy that way for now.
    You, on the other hand, are even younger, make the most of your single life. Go out with your friends, have fun, do what you want to do. In fact, I think it is good that you have high standards, rather than rushing into something that will just crash and burn.
    Patience is key. Don't go out looking for someone when you are not ready, wait for them to find you and then you can decide what you want, if you want it. If you are happy at the moment, why change that?
    There is someone out there for you, but right now, you are concentrating on other things and prioritising (if that's a word) yourself, and there is nothing wrong with that at all.
    Many people say that the few years they have, before they meet someone and get married, are the years that they have had most fun, spending time with their friends and going out and exploring. This is what you are probably doing and it is making you happy. Keep it that way for now until you decide that you are ready for commitment.

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