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-   -   Formal meeting. Accuser is lying (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=831960)

  • Apr 27, 2017, 03:49 PM
    DivineDew9
    Formal meeting. Accuser is lying
    Hi Im sorry for the long letter but its very important if you could help me please. I asked earlier about formal meeting and now formal meeting happened only with me and a manager of other department.
    Basically what happened was: my collgue who kept on bulying me over years unnoticeably to other colleagues (kicking under the table so to say) made a complain against me. She made a complain about me when I standed for myself and asked her why she allocated me work somewhere where she wanted, because that's managers job to allocate people and she is not my manager. She took this responcibility herself because being too overconfident she was doing things that she was notsupposed to be doing and nobody can tell her anything because they don't want to argue with her, so everyone at all times keep quiet, but that day I was fed up and simply asked her why she who does not have a permission allocated me where I was not supposed to be going. She started being rude to me and talking down at me. I went on the PC to start writing a complain to our manager. While I was writing, she quicklycalled our manager and complained over the phone- so she was first to complain so the case is in her favour, not my.
    Today was formal meeting: aparently this bully said to our manager that I called her 'idiot' during our verbal fight, which is a total lie as I did not say that! My guess is she 'invented' that lye to make her case look more serious ( because she probably understood that I will have more to complain about her and her bulying me over the years than she about me so her complain will lack validity, therefore she decided to lie to our manager that I called her idiot and make her complain more purposefull ). During our verbal fight, one of our colleagues was present and heard our fight. She is a good friend of that bully and we simply get along well. So today during formal meeting I was told that this colleague who witnessed my and bullie's verbal fight will be questioned and asked to say what she saw and heard that day. Im afraid that being bullies better friend than my she can 'confirm' and say that I was calling this our colleague an 'idiot'. What shall I do? Thank you
  • Apr 27, 2017, 04:34 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    First, so even if you called them an idiot, "so what" did you explain about the other person assigning the work ? That should be easy to prove??

    And no it is not who calls first, it is who is believed, calling first does not mean most believed.

    You merely tell them the truth, and you should have proof of what you were complaining about. I do not see where calling a "co worker " this was not a boss, is really that big of deal even if they think you did it.

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