After we broke up, I really wanted to forget her and such. More I tried, the more I step a few steps back. Now reminiscing I seriously feel she had cheated on me... and that might be the reason we broke up. It's been like half a year since we broke up but I still can't forget her. One of the reason is I really want to know if she did cheated on me, in the past I caught her right handed when she lied to me(on more than a few occasion) this gave me really a bad impression about her, but I still loved her, as said no matter what it was I doubted by self because I really loved her. I want to ask her if she did cheated on me(or what ever the reason we really broke up for), but am 100 percent sure she won't tell me the truth , due to fact I can't TRUST her at all. I feel as though she puts up a disguise around me.

I have been trying really hard to just forget her, because there's toooooooo many fish in the sea but it is easier said than done. Any help?? Can I really ask her that question with a setup plan?
(if you need more info, I can provide , please tell me your solemn views of this situation)
Lost and depress...

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by tryinghard

After we broke up, i really wanted to forget her and such. More i tried, the more i step a few steps back.

---

Ever hear the saying the harder you try the harder it is? Well this aplies twice as much to forgetting an Ex, Every time you think about her your re-opening old wounds, wounds that need to start healing.

Store away all the pictures you have of her, delete her out of your phone, myspace, Facebook and whatever else is going to bring up memories of her / her and you together.

You had a life BEFORE you met this girl right? It was not the start of all life for you... You had something before her and I'm sure you were somewhat content. You CAN go back to it, if you try. So stay busy, busy, busy and just continue living. Act like you never met this girl and you might start enjoying life a little more.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by tryinghard

Now reminiscing i seriously feel she had cheated on me... and that might be the reason we broke up.

---

Maybe or maybe not, the faster you realize that this is just a detail the better off you are. You may never EVER find out so try to come to terms with this, no point to hang yourself up over something out of your hands.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by tryinghard

It's been like half a year since we broke up but i still can't forget her. One of the reason is i really want to know if she did cheated on me,

---

Again it's in the past she has moved on you need to as well. The answer may come in time but it's also 100% unimportent to moving on with your life. Just try and use this experience to learn from.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by tryinghard

in the past i caught her right handed when she lied to me(on more than a few occasion) this gave me really a bad impression about her, but i still loved her, as said no matter what it was i doubted by self because i really loved her. I want to ask her if she did cheated on me(or what ever the reason we really broke up for), but am 100 percent sure she won't tell me the truth , due to fact i can't TRUST her at all. I feel as though she puts up a disguise around me.

---

Maybe she was playing you? You never know. What kinds of things did you catch her in?

Why are you caring? She lied to you, possibly cheated on you and held you at arms leangth the entire time. So she mistreats you and you repay her by putting her on a pedestal and caring for her when she has already moved on, probably a LONG time ago. You realize and know it yourself that this is wrong at a lot of different levels. I know you know this is wrong... RIGHT? Forget her by any means you have to. If you have to convice yourself you HATE her it's better than where you are at now.

What you need to realize is that while you are sitting around wasting precious time and energy you could be spending it making yourself a better person and preparing yourself emotionally to move on and eventually being with another BETTER girl (hopefully :) )

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by tryinghard

I have been trying really hard to just forget her, because there's toooooooo many fish in the sea but it is easier said than done. Any help??????????Can i really ask her that question with a setup plan?
(if u need more info, i can provide , please tell me your solemn views of this situation)
lost n depress.........

---

I don't think you will get a straight answer from her for a LONG time maybe never. You have to learn that the past is the past and there really are A lot of fish in the sea but your not going to catch any if your worrying about whether or not the patch job on your boat is going to burst from not being fully repaired. So man up move on repair yourself and get that line in the water and sooner than you think you will be getting some good bites.

There is no point in trying to put together the past, especially with someone who no longer wants to be with you. You need to accept it. You keep on seeking closure, but believe me it is best to let it go. What she did to you while together DOES NOT matter. The more energy you devote to her the less you have for yourself. She is dead to you! I mean that... DEAD! Don't get mad when I say that, just act like it is the truth, for your own good. You two owe each other nothing.

Nothing is more frustrating than your own mind hounding you about pointless things. I'm sorry your view of love has you so crippled.

There is no such thing as closure. Nothing she ever says or does to admit or deny will help. Truly. It won't. You think so, so I'm sure you're going to keep fretting about it, but even if she admitted, you'd feel better for about a day (or less) and then 20 more related "closure" questions would occur to you and you'd be more hurt than ever.

I'm sorry. You two broke up because you aren't compatible. However that truth came to reality, be grateful for it.

The healing will take as long as it takes. If she broke up with YOU, it will take even longer, but it will still occur. Do your time.

I got my closure my throwing everything the cheater gave to me and ripping up the pictures my room feels much calmer without all those lies

Thanks for the help, I appreciate it. Hope I get my feelings back on track and find something more meaningful

You will find something more meaningful if you take the initiative to look for it. It is YOUR time now, so get busy and make yourself that much better. The feelings will be there for awhile. I wish a magic pill existed to get rid of them, but that ain't the truth. It takes time. You will be fine!

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by tryinghard https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/amhd_i...s/viewpost.gif
It's been like half a year since we broke up but i still can't forget her. One of the reason is i really want to know if she did cheated on me,

---

Doesn't matter any more.

I appreciate a lot your faithfulness ; your feelings towards her .really it s becoming rare to see :) You have such a beautiful heart that honestly she doesn't deserve to be inside it.all what you need is quiet simple, you have to reschedule your life according to a number of priorities in your life.the ultimate priority that you have to work on is to live a happy + peaceful life and this can't be achieved if you carry on thinking this way.you have to erase every memory that reminds you of her at whatever price.believe me when you stop chasing the wrong thing you give the right things a chance to catch you and once you stop wasting your time on thinking of her you will discover a new sense ,a new meaning of life.really a new breath ^^