I'm a 20 yr old woman who grew up being abused. I was adopted after being physically abused and neglected. I was bullied in school and sexually assaulted in high school. I suffer from PTSD, depression, severe anxiety, and other things. Because of all of this, I've had major relationship problems with men. I've been called psycho/crazy/etc and went through a couple horribly rough break ups.
I'm currently in college and in a relationship with an amazing 22 yr old man. He's by far the most mature, level-headed, kindhearted man I've ever known and I love him to death. However, deep down, I'm terrified. I'm scared of annoying him or making him angry, even though he's never called me names, said anything hurtful, hurt me in any way or shown the slightest hint of violence at all. He solved issues by calmly explaining what he doesn't like and how he wants to change that. I really, really appreciate that, and love him even more for being so under control and nice to me despite my flaws. It's gotten bad enough that we've gotten into a couple of fights over this.
I just don't know what to do. I don't have the slightest idea how to explain to him that I'm not afraid of him specifically, I'm just... scared. I'm scared that I'm going to get hurt if I make him angry. It's completely illogical, but I've had massive breakdowns because I'm so afraid, and I don't want to keep feeling this way. Most of all, I don't want to lose him.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated! Thanks!
