Change how you react to your children's misbehavior --

1) Sing instructions or warnings instead of shouting them. Do opera (works well with instructions and warnings) or country. Play your air guitar.

2) Or try whispering. Whisper with lots of vivid facial expressions. As you whisper (or move into a storytelling voice), tell the story of "Goldilocks and the Three Bears." Make mistakes so the kids will listen and correct you and get into the storytelling. "Once upon a time there was a little boy named Goldilocks. His black hair had been cut in the shape of a beautiful Mohawk that stuck straight up out of the top of his head. He decided to visit his Uncle Louie who lived deep in the forest." (And so on.)

3) If someone is naughty, start a story, "Once upon a time there was a handsome young man trapped in a blue house. His name was [wait to hear a name]. Once day, he decided to [wait to hear a verb, etc.]." (And so on.)

4) Do the Teaberry Shuffle or some simple dance and get the kids involved in dancing. Clap your hands. Be enthusiastic. Hum a melody or put on the boom box.

In other words, you want to shock the heck out of them and totally change the mood/behavior in the house at the time.

More ideas from joypulv --

1) Hating yourself just makes it worse. Try to accept that kids are going to fight no matter how sweet and adorable you are. Give yourself a treat for each day you get through where you were able to curb your anger once, twice, 3 times. Try for the little successes. God isn't going to wave a magic wand; it's work.

2) Some afternoon sit them down with no distractions. It's amazing what even young ones can understand if you say it right. Stand in front of them like a teacher would, and teach. Talk about the golden rule and what love means. Tell them that for thousands of years kids had to work to help the family survive, on the farm or hunting or gathering, and in many parts of the world it's still true today. Ask for their help being a good mom, and ask for suggestions to cut down on fighting.

3) Draw a chore chart and explain that you get angry when you are overworked and tired.

4) Have planned activities for certain set times of day, such as when you are trying to cook. Kids need direction and some routine. Have a family classroom each day, a short one, or maybe two.