"Nymphomaniac" Refuses To Give Up on BF
You may skip the first paragraph if you do not want the background info :)
To start, I will say that ever since I can remember I have always been interested in sex, masturbation and pornography. I had a normal childhood, but by 3 or 4 I had already been caught doing.. and watching.. so many unusual things (for a child) that I would think only teenage boys do because they are so taken over by hormones. Fast forward to my teenage years. I get a boyfriend! Finally, I have sex and it's amazing! Seven years, but I still don't see myself getting married to this guy, so I move on and I start dating. During this time, I dated a lot, but sex with the FEW men I have been with wasn't really enjoyable because there was no spark for me.. Until I met my second boyfriend. Onto the present..
I have been with my boyfriend for a year and we are both in our 20s. We are very much in love, but we are complete opposites when it comes to sex. When we got together I felt so much love for him that my sex drive shot through the roof and now it just seems to be a nuisance. I love to watch porn, I love to experiment, I love different positions, sex toys, lingerie, role-playing, sexting, making out, sex multiple times a day EVERY day.. He is the complete opposite. In fact, he is so against most of these things that he actually makes me feel pretty bad about it by calling me a "nympho" and giving me strange looks like when I tell him I have been thinking about sex with him all day. Oh, and he hates that I am bisexual because the thought of two women for him pretty much just grosses him out. Needless to say, I look at girls sometimes and see them as attractive and for him it's just a "What girl? Oh, sure." type of thing. I have talked to him so much about this and he has just never been interested in sex. With anyone. And he has maybe masturbated twice in his entire lifetime. I think the only reason he has sex with me two or three times a week is because he is trying to keep me happy in bed.. And sadly, I am not. It drives me crazy to the point where I just obsess about it all day! I masturbate pretty much every day, but nothing compares to the real thing so it is just disappointing and makes me want it more. I feel I have done everything I can - I talk to him about how I am feeling without being whiney (rarely now because it does no good), I compliment him in all aspects to keep his confidence high, of course I tell him when he does something good, I let him sleep whenever he is tired, I make sex "WOW" for him even though he doesn't like to continue for more than 15 minutes if at all and in only one position, I drop sexy hints, touch him certain ways in attempts to get blood flowing, I model lingerie for photoshoots/magazines a lot so he is used to seeing me in it (no help there) and it just seems that there is nothing else I can do. I have a HIGH sex drive and he probably has the lowest. It has always been this way for him and from what his mother has told me, his father is the same way. I refuse to cheat and I refuse to leave him because of sex. There are 7 days in a week, in which we see each other every one of those days and have many hours together plus weekends - I will settle for 4 times a week! I believe that for any relationship sex is important and I understand that when you get older, have children, sex will be less often. I could cry. Did I mention that we are in our 20s, have our careers started and both have flexible, low-stress jobs?
I know there are many others out there like me so if you are reading this, you understand, I would love any words of wisdom! Sorry for the rambling.. I'm asking a question, giving info, AND venting at the same time :)