Do I seek approval from my father of my fiancé or even invite my father who divorced my mother 20 years ago to my wedding. I'm 30 years old and he was never part of my life after the divorce and I only talk to him a couple of times of year. He still acts like a father over the phone but never help me financially even through college or later in life and never has made the attempt to see me or visit me.

What do you think? My fiancé won't even talk to him because he doesn't believe in divorce and I agree with him.

Well, the big thing would be an invitation. He may have never been part of your life, and there are different reasons he was not part of your growing years. My own situation was mom was not a nice person and basically poisoned me against dad. Was not until he was in his 60's that I found out the truth. Maybe a similar situation.

I don't think you need to seek the approval of either. People have gotten too far away from the real purpose of a wedding. It isn't about proper protocol. It is about sharing a special day with those you love. If you don't feel close or bonded or that your dad really deserves to share that with you then don't invite him. If you want to continue to have a relationship (though over the phone isn't much of one) with him then you may want to consider the possible aftereffects of not inviting him. Honestly though from the sound of your "relationship" with him... I wouldn't feel compelled to invite him knowing how greatly it will upset your future husband who has been there to love and support you and will be your family.

Be careful judging your father though about getting a divorce you really never can know why people do what they do or sometimes have to do or the full situation unless you have lived it. People make mistakes but we all deserve to be forgiven and not judged.

I will agree you don't need anyone's approval, and you don't need to invite anyone you don't want to, it is your wedding, do what you want.

But I will say, that first, don't judge others that divorce, first often things happen. But I would invite them all because they were a part of your life at one time