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-   -   My boyfriend got handjob and blow**b from somewhere else, what should I do? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=838838)

  • May 16, 2018, 11:11 PM
    unknownnn
    My boyfriend got handjob and blow**b from somewhere else, what should I do?
    So I'm in a long distance relationship, one day my boyfriend got handjob and blow**b from a massage 'plus-plus' bcs at that time he really can't handle his needs and we live in different city. I really don't know what to do, I don't want to breakup but.. what should I do?
  • May 17, 2018, 12:00 AM
    unknownnn
    I mean like, is this thing acceptable? I really don't know what to do...
  • May 17, 2018, 04:56 AM
    J_9
    Have you ever met him in person?
  • May 17, 2018, 06:52 AM
    talaniman
    If you told him you got your needs taken care of by a massage parlor worker what do you think his reaction would be? Why don't you ask him, and find out if YOU can take care of YOUR needs as he has. I would love to know his response.

    Asking him will at least start the process of deciding whether this long distance relationship is worth it or not, and give you FACTS and insights into his character. For you though would it be acceptable if he took care of his sexual needs HIMSELF, in private with magazines or videos?

    Personally I find his behavior unacceptable, and he only gets a little credit for honesty. What do you think?
  • May 17, 2018, 07:23 AM
    unknownnn
    Quote:

    Have you ever met him in person?
    Yes I have

    Quote:

    If you told him you got your needs taken care of by a massage parlor worker what do you think his reaction would be? Why don't you ask him, and find out if YOU can take care of YOUR needs as he has. I would love to know his response.
    The funny thing is he doesn't want me to do that, he keeps say sorry to me and tells me that he wasn't in his right mind, he really couldn't handle it

    Quote:

    For you though would it be acceptable if he took care of his sexual needs HIMSELF, in private with magazines or videos?
    For me, I'm okay with that, I prefer he does that than doing it with other girls
  • May 17, 2018, 08:08 AM
    talaniman
    Thanks for the added details. It comes down to whether you can forgive his one time(?) transgression, and deal with your own fears, and hurt over this event. How long have you been together and how often do you actually spend time together. How long will distance be the issue?

    Comes down to do you trust he will not repeat this behavior, and can TRUST be rebuilt over time.
  • May 17, 2018, 10:23 AM
    Oliver2011
    My concerns would be, in no particular order, what diseases has he picked up going to a place like that? If he's only not in his right mind after the fact, will he go again? What was he thinking in going to a place like that? Was this visit #1 or visit #143? Do you both have the same relationship expectations?

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