I am beginning to believe that there is something wrong with me, it has to be me. After all I went through with my crazy ex that I've shared here, I finally met a really great woman and things were going very well or so I thought. This new woman is 10 years younger than myself and has two children ages 2 and 1. We met through a mutual friend and hit it off instantly. The first night we met we wound up sitting on her porch until 4AM just talking and it was really great. The second time we met up it was pretty much the same thing. So after that we exchanged numbers and started spending more time together. Its been a couple of months now that we've been doing this and have fallen into a "routine" about what nights we call each other and what nights we spend time together. Our "routine" just kind of came together around her kids and their needs. There was nothing wrong with that and it was great after what I had been through. Also we weren't bf/gf per her request. She just wanted us to be friends with benefits which also was fine with me since I knew the "game rules" going in.
Today I got back from a week long vacation that was planned long before I ever met this woman and all h@ll broke loose. I called her to let her know that I was back in town and her reply was "I don't think our relationship is working and I want to end it right now. You really don't care about me and I guess it took you to go on vacation for me to realize just how little I really meant to you. You really aren't the person I thought you were and I don't want to waste any more time with this. You wanted to be my bf in name only, but didn't want any of the responsibilities or baggage that comes with being my bf."
I guess while I was gone on vacation the ground rules changed and somewhere along the line I became her boyfriend unbeknowest to me.
When I asked her what the heck was going on and what brought this up, she replied "you didn't send me flowers after the first time we had sex, you wouldn't get a tattoo with me when I asked you to, and when I asked you to go to Las Vegas with me you said you would, but weren't very convincing and I just can't be with someone who won't go to Vegas with me". So needless to say I was still trying to take all this in when she hit me with "you are probably the worst bf I've ever had. You just don't care about me or are even trying to get to know me. Even though you always ask about my kids and ask about my day and what I have going on, I don't think you really care. I think you just do it because you think you need to so you can continue to get me into bed".
Oh on the Vegas thing... she came up with the idea at 8PM on Friday night of Memorial weekend and wanted to come back either Saturday night (the next night) late or early Sunday morning so we could be back in time to be home Sunday, so when her ex husband dropped of the kids on Sunday she'd be there for them. She got pretty upset when we couldn't find a flight out that night and blamed me for not trying hard enough to find one. I guess calling every airline that flies from our city and them telling both her and I they were booked solid or had no flights out yet that night to Vegas was poor planning on my part.
As I'm typing this I'm still trying to figure out what the heck happened today. So after her telling me that our "relationship" was over, I told her I was sorry to hear that she felt that way but if that is what she wanted I understood. That really put her in a tirade. "she told me that I was to passive for her, and that if I really did care for her that I would've put up some sort of fight to keep our "she told me that I was to passive for her, and that if I really did care for her that I would've put up some sort of fight to keep our " together". Then she got into the " together". My not spending money on her was actually her choice. During our time together I was always suggesting we go here, go there, do this, do that. She wanted to just keep things the way they were, which was just coming over to my house drinking beer, doing a couple of shots, watching movies and having sex. She told me that that was working for her and she didn't want to mess it up by changing it. She told me that she felt if we actually went out and did things it would be like dating and since we were not dating she didn't want to change up. When I would buy her something it was always "you're also a cheap bum because you didn't even spend any money on me" or if we'd go for coffee it was "you know that you could've bought the same thing at this store, but I see you went to this store just because you could save a few dollars. I guess I'm not worth the extra couple of dollars to you"?
At that point I had heard enough and told her it was time to end our conversation. Then she changed gears and asked me if I had taken any pictures on my vacation. I told her that I had. She then asked if she could have one of me. I just had to ask why? Her response was because I want a new picture of you.
I don't get it... she just ended whatever it was that we had and she wants a new picture of me... why?
As we ended our conversation she tells me that she would still take my calls... if she were home... if I wanted to continue to call her and that she hoped I would. I just don't see that happening.
I guess I'm just to stupid and nieve to not have read between the lines and instead taken her at her word concerning our "you couldn't afford to get me the biggest they had" of just being friends with benny's and not being bf/gf. I guess when its to good to be true it really isn't true.
Tonight she stopped by my house and another "arraingement" came out. Now it appears what triggered all of this was I didn't keep our schedule of when we talk on the phone while I was on vacation. She had a rough week while I was gone on vacation and needed a shoulder to cry on and I was nowhere around and she felt that once again I didn't care because I didn't keep the schedule. The best part of her coming by this evening... she told me that when she gets her new furniture delievered she wants to have me over for dinner and to see her new stuff. Again... WHY?
You think I would've learned from the last time. I think its actually time for me to stop dating. Thanks for letting me rant and vent... its just been one of those days.