My husband and I have been married for a year but have been together for some time. Im a small lady and he is quite a big built man and as a result of it has quite a large penis.

Sometime when we make love he really hurts me and I don't quite know what to do about it as can become really painful. I feel sorry for him as he has often told me that he has had problems with making love to women in the past because of it. But I grind my death and try and bear it until its over and that is now way to actually be making love to your husband.

Don't get me wrong its not allways like that but during the end when he is about to ejaculate he gets carried away and I don't have the heart to tell him to stop because he's hurting me. It can make sex quite offputting.

What should we do ?

Hi Mrs Piet,

I am sorry for your trouble. I wonder if lubrication would help any? I think the best thing is to talk to your husband about it and tell him what is happening. He may be open to oral or hand stimulated ejaculation. The best thing is to talk, don't live in pain.

I definitely agree about lubrication. If you two are having foreplay your vagina will shrink and then your body should conform to his. Now if it is hurting you because his penetration is to long for you maybe ask him to not put it in all the way. If it is the girth that is what is bothering you then lubrication should help. I have the same problem with my boyfriend and it does help.