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-   -   Not a real problem, just a question to make you think? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=34742)

  • Sep 21, 2006, 03:51 AM
    chuff
    Not a real problem, just a question to make you think?
    Ok I had a friend at work ask me this and I'm passing it on here.

    Suppose you married your high school sweetheart and were married happily for 25 years. The marriage produced one child. Then one day after 25 years your spouse suddenly died. After the greiving period you met and married someone else and had another child with that person. After another happy 25 year marriage that spouse suddenly died. A few years later you are preparing your will and other papers for after your death. Then the question comes up...

    Who will you choose to be buried next to your first or your second spouse?
  • Sep 21, 2006, 03:56 AM
    Lianne20
    Is this a trick question?? Hmmmm?
    If not, I'd be cremated and half of my ashes would go next to the first, half to the second! There. Sorted fair and square :-)
  • Sep 21, 2006, 04:26 AM
    Aussie
    I agree - that's fair!
  • Sep 21, 2006, 05:26 AM
    chuff
    No this is not a trick question. It's just a question to make you think. Your answers are pretty good so far. But what if you had to be buried. Can't be cremated.
  • Sep 21, 2006, 05:49 AM
    SINGLE4
    WOW... tough call but... If I had to choose one or the other I would say... probably the first husband. The reason for this is that I was married to that person first and if they hadn't died... I would've still been married to him. It is not a "who I loved more issue" but... WOW, this is a hard call!
  • Sep 21, 2006, 05:54 AM
    talaniman
    I don't like the idea of dirt in my face so in my will I will be cremated. If you have to be buried then I probably won't have a lot to say about it... Okay Chuff have you lost it or what?
  • Sep 21, 2006, 07:00 AM
    Lianne20
    If you HAD to be buried!? Well, then I wouldn't make the choice! I'd leave it up to my relatives, let them fight over it! Defeats the whole object of the question, but never mind. It's a good anwer I think ;)
  • Sep 21, 2006, 10:39 AM
    31pumpkin
    How about getting input from the surviving "children" when making out your will.

    It's still "to death do you part", right? & I don't think either spouse is spiritually in the grave. So I'm for cremation anyway. It is cleaner. No creepy bugs decomposing me slowly, yuck!

    Also I can't get past the fact that this fictitious person actually gave birth, at what, 50? Again! So I have no idea where they would choose to be buried anyway! LOL!
  • Sep 21, 2006, 11:28 AM
    Presleygall85
    :eek: I know this is groose but maybe you could just cut the body in half that way everyone wins... Creepy:p :o
  • Sep 21, 2006, 07:39 PM
    CaptainForest
    First, I would ask, which wife did I love more? If they answer was, both, then I would go with the first one.

    Simply put, when my first wife died, she ASSUMED we would be buried together. After all, we had a 25 year marriage.

    It is one thing to get over her and move on, but another thing to abandon her.

    She was first, therefore, she should get the priority.
  • Sep 22, 2006, 11:05 PM
    chuff
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by talaniman
    I don't like the idea of dirt in my face so in my will I will be cremated. If you have to be buried then I probably won't have a lot to say about it...............................Okay Chuff have you lost it or what?

    Well Tal, I lost it a long time ago. I think others are just starting to realize it though!!
  • Sep 22, 2006, 11:25 PM
    JoeCanada76
    Neither one of them. That makes it easier.
  • Sep 23, 2006, 08:41 AM
    s_cianci
    In my opinion it would seem that the most recent spouse would be the appropriate one to be buried next to, if indeed he chooses to be buried next to either one.
  • Sep 23, 2006, 09:02 AM
    J_9
    How about this one...

    All three be buried together with me in the middle. That way I would be with both of my loves.

    Either that or I would donate my body to science or the body farm or someplace that would continue someone's education as I have been continuing my own.
  • Sep 23, 2006, 11:12 AM
    JoeCanada76
    J9,

    I wanted to spread the love to you. I was actually thinking that originally. Having both spouses on each side, but of course I did not go with my first though. Anyway. Spreading the love, spreading the love. One thing I really hate with passion on this site. Is that you are limited to how you can comment on somebodys post.

    Joe
  • Sep 23, 2006, 12:23 PM
    talaniman
    As long as I get buried with the remote I doubt if I can complain much.
  • Sep 23, 2006, 12:28 PM
    aqua@home
    I agree with J9 answer and was going to add that if I was smart, I would have buried the second husband by the first... foresight is a wonderful thing.

    Personally though, I really wouldn't care. I suppose I would have to have had it prearranged so my children wouldn't have an issue with it. I guess I would have had to teach my children that this really doesn't matter and not to even bother arguing over it. I'm dead! It doesn't matter where I'm buried. My body is no good to me at this time. I would be much more worried about who will be waiting for me in the afterlife. Would there be a decision to be made then?
  • Sep 23, 2006, 05:11 PM
    limarle15
    Couldn't I just be buried in between them both? If that is not possible, how about neither?
  • Sep 25, 2006, 10:21 AM
    YeloDasy
    My first reaction was to be with the 1st... romantic and all... but then reality is to plan your will and death according to your current life. SO then I would choose the second. I guess it would depend on how my children felt also. But if there was a big problem in the decision, well, I have a huge family (6 brothers and sisters) and I am the youngest, so I can always be buried with my immediate family! :)
  • Sep 26, 2006, 12:49 AM
    Krs
    I would say near my first husband, exactly for the same good reasons SINGLE4 gave.

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