My gosh.... I wish I had thought of something as wonderful as that!:p You're wise and I love your step-by-step method. Thank you:)
My gosh.... I wish I had thought of something as wonderful as that!:p You're wise and I love your step-by-step method. Thank you:)
Thanks CS. It's a product of... fatigue and a momentary reflection on a full life.Quote:
Originally Posted by Canada_Sweety
Hope some folks can benefit.
I think I've actually used the step method:D
WOW! You are a very helpful person! THANKS!
Ok, I have followed this.. but now I am confused...
My girlfriend (or should I say, my ex) has texted me twice today to tell me she is thinking about me and she loves me.. should I reply to this?
She also texts me every night to say night and that she loves me..
NO WAY. No response yet.
She will be OK.. I know you are feeling... Mean or something.
But, now you have the power... Like it?
So, now is the time to decide if you can do anything better with her the second time.
Each day that passes you have to ask can you bear another break up AND
Do you even WANT to go out with her at all?
You must wait or you all will immediately cycle BACK to where you were.
I would advise (and I have been through this MANY times) to give this time.
Or until she ever comes up with something concrete that
Makes the past and the future workable. She won't likely come out with an
"i'm sorry..." but a clear willingness to talk and admit some fault or vulnerablity
To you is important. Responding will not help your cause.
Think about the good and the bad of your relationship. You have her back now. Do you really want her?
Ok, next time she texts, writes, calls let me know. This isn't so much about anything but giving yourself
The sanity of mind now to make a clear decision. Breathe - and talk to you soon.
She has already said "sorry but I just need a break, we have met up every day since we started going out and I've been taking advantage of you because we've seen each other that much. I need to realise what I'm missing. I'm sorry and I know I'm treating you like dirt".Quote:
Originally Posted by Ash123
So she has already said sorry.. I will give it a few days and then maybe reply to her and say "You're the one who asked for the break, why do you keep texting me?".
Well said now where were you four months ago when I was doing the exact opposite of your wonderful advice she speak wise words people listen closely
Ok DaazaB,
SINCE YOU ARE UNDER 18 I'M NOT Going to INTERFERE IN THIS TOO MUCH.
BUT, LET HER BREATHE - THE "SORRY" CAME WITH A "I NEED TO REALIZE" -- don't forget that. She is a brush fire that only needs a little gasoline to flare up again... take you time.
**JUST REMEMBER: DO WELL IN SCHOOL, FIND A CAREER, AND TAKE CARE OF YOUR HEALTH... IN THE END THAT'S THE BEST WAY TO GET THE BEST GIRLS.
Don't stress too much now. You'll have enough to worry about later. The more you do the above stuff the less stress later... REALLY.
I wish I read this a few weeks back, because than I would have liked to have used steps 1-3. Oh well, step 4 is a start as well.
Hmm.. how is that holding up for you?
This is great advice. Its been about a week and a half since we broke up.
I'm trying my best to follow through but its just so hard.
I haven't contacted my ex and he hasn't contacted me. I get urges to call but I know that will only push him back. I really hope he realizes and comes back around. :(
Ruby07, stay strong. Every time you make contact u lessen your chances of ever winning them back, and u only torture yourself more. I'm in the same boat right now, so I know how hard it is too.
I think this is wonderful advice as well. However during my breakup she mentioned to be strong... will me not contacting her give her the impression that I am strong and doing well (even though I'm a wreck) and make it easier for her to justify her decision?
When you break up, there are so many emotions flying all over the place. You are hurt, angry, dissapointed, was it me? You should not be trying to look for reconciliation, you should be looking towards you. Improve yourself and your life and get on the path to the new you. No contact helps with this...
The future is bright but only if you make it so, don't live in the past, learn from it, or nothing will improve including any relationship with your ex.
Sorry PAMD,Quote:
Originally Posted by PAMD
Maybe Re-read the initial steps. There are rarely words after the first week that can help unless you are on a "break" for a set amount of time... If words MUST be spoken that are vital to a misunderstanding - say it THEN... or months later when you are clearer headed.
I truly believe (based on every happily married couple and every unhappy couple I know) that soulmates/functional couples can survive a break - but how you break is key.
(Breaking a lot, breaking for spite, for sex, for money, for power, for attention, for a mood swing) is not healthy. Breaking because you are hurt, unsure, scared, trying to be practical, for age, or timing, is OK. I think people know if they can last a lifetime but go on and on for the wrong reasons... It's learning the good from the bad is what let's us find the right person. The person who has our back and is a teammate who will sacrifice for us - and us for them...
Communication is very hard at the point of a break. BUT THE BREAK CAN BE AN OPPORTUNITY**
So, try to listen and speak what you need as well. A healthy couple with potential will get through this,
and BENEFIT in time. If they are not to be, this is the opportunity to find the RIGHT person! Not getting buried in confusion, pain and sorrow for too long is the key for realizing this is also an opportunity to meet Mr./Mrs. RIGHT.
Your energy will be strong, so keep your eyes open :-)
What do you do if you're the breaker... how do you handle this. What is you have to break it off because the other party won't when it need to be broken. What do you do then?Quote:
Originally Posted by Ash123
I have a girlfreind who says " I need time to 'grasp' my emotions about you"
She says that she still loves me but just needs to realize it again.
What is up and what should I do?? School starts on Wednesday and I have classes with her.
Sounds like a woman!!
give her space...
adds to your value and lets her not stress... smile when you see her if you can.
But don't pressure her... then, stay away. And stay busy.
let me know how it goes...
Hello I am drunk and intoxicated. I say stay single! PUT YOUR HANDS UP!! WOOP WOOP
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