I met the guy of my dreams - only flaw is his stinginess! Help!
I'm 23 and have gone out with about 20 guys in my life. A month and a half ago I met the guy of my dreams. Everything is perfect - we love each other and are in the kind of relationship I've always wanted. The only problem - it seems to me that sometime he is selfish in money matters - or does it seem to me that way? He's 24, unemployed, broke, lives with and borrows money from parents. However he is a recent college graduate and is actively looking for a job. He does pay for me when we go out or for gifts. But sometimes when it's a matter of spending $3-10, he hesitates, asks me if I'd pay, or just doesn't ask if I want something. Does he have a good excuse considering his situation, or not? Actions speak louder than words (of "I love you"), but am I being unfair to him? In a healthy relationship, normally responsibilities are divided equally, but I think that in terms of paying, a guy should normally pay for a girl more often. In our case, I feel it's almost equal. He knows I don't have much money being a student on OSAP. What do you suggest? I definitely wouldn't want to dump the guy of my dreams. Does he love me as he says/believes he does?
Here are a few examples:
1. Came empty-handed once when came over for the weekend
2. Asked if I wanted a drink, I was silent, he - "we'll share”, didn't offer until I asked
3. Got himself burger while me beside him, only asking me if I'm hungry 15 minutes later
4. Going to get subway sandwich, him asking “do u have money”, me “no”, then him getting one sandwich and splitting with me. Later getting timmy's drink and not asking me.
5. Going to movie, him paying, right after in car, “its on you next time”
6. Didn't take me out for valentine's day (also 1 month anniversary), (but did buy me gift)
I met the guy of my dreams - only flaw is his stinginess! Help!
I'm 23 and have gone out with about 20 guys in my life. A month and a half ago I met the guy of my dreams. Everything is perfect - we love each other and are in the kind of relationship I've always wanted. The only problem - it seems to me that sometime he is selfish in money matters - or does it seem to me that way? He's 24, unemployed, broke, lives with and borrows money from parents. However he is a recent college graduate and is actively looking for a job. He does pay for me when we go out or for gifts. But sometimes when it's a matter of spending $3-10, he hesitates, asks me if I'd pay, or just doesn't ask if I want something. Does he have a good excuse considering his situation, or not? Actions speak louder than words (of "I love you"), but am I being unfair to him? In a healthy relationship, normally responsibilities are divided equally, but I think that in terms of paying, a guy should normally pay for a girl more often. In our case, I feel it's almost equal. He knows I don't have much money being a student on OSAP. What do you suggest? I definitely wouldn't want to dump the guy of my dreams. Does he love me as he says/believes he does?
Here are a few examples:
1. Came empty-handed once when came over for the weekend
2. Asked if I wanted a drink, I was silent, he - "we'll share”, didn’t offer until I asked
3. Got himself burger while me beside him, only asking me if I’m hungry 15 minutes later
4. Going to get subway sandwich, him asking “do u have money”, me “no”, then him getting one sandwich and splitting with me. Later getting timmy’s drink and not asking me.
5. Going to movie, him paying, right after in car, “its on you next time”
6. Didn’t take me out for valentine's day (also 1 month anniversary), (but did buy me gift)
7. Sometimes doesn't text back because it costs him (like 25cents)
I found the right guy... only one thing is wrong...
I'm 23 and have gone out with about 20 guys in my life. A month and a half ago I met the guy of my dreams. Everything is perfect - we love each other and are in the kind of relationship I've always wanted. The only problem - it seems to me that sometime he is selfish in money matters - or does it seem to me that way? He's 24, unemployed, broke, lives with and borrows money from parents. However he is a recent college graduate and is actively looking for a job. He does pay for me when we go out or for gifts. But sometimes when it's a matter of spending $3-10, he hesitates, asks me if I'd pay, or just doesn't ask if I want something. Does he have a good excuse considering his situation, or not? Actions speak louder than words (of "I love you"), but am I being unfair to him? In a healthy relationship, normally responsibilities are divided equally, but I think that in terms of paying, a guy should normally pay for a girl more often. In our case, I feel it's almost equal. He knows I don't have much money being a student on OSAP. What do you suggest? I definitely wouldn't want to dump the guy of my dreams. Does he love me as he says/believes he does?
Here are a few examples:
1. Came empty-handed once when came over for the weekend
2. Asked if I wanted a drink, I was silent, he - "we'll share”, didn’t offer until I asked
3. Got himself burger while me beside him, only asking me if I’m hungry 15 minutes later
4. Going to get subway sandwich, him asking “do u have money”, me “no”, then him getting one sandwich and splitting with me. Later getting timmy’s drink and not asking me.
5. Going to movie, him paying, right after in car, “its on you next time”
6. Didn’t take me out for valentine's day (also 1 month anniversary), (but did buy me gift)
7. Sometimes doesn't text me back because it costs him (like 25 cents)
How do I reveal a secret to my boyfriend?
Threads merged and edited.
Only problem is, I have a secret, and I don't know if/how/when I should tell him. The first is, my brother has been mentally ill since about 5 years ago. I am afraid that if I will tell him, he won't want to continue anything serious with me, or he wouldn't see us together in the long run, because he'd be afraid of the "genetic factor". Either that I'd have something, or even more importantly, that our future kids would have something. I personally have studied psychology and I know this is not likely to happen. But I fear he will think that. Should I tell him the truth? Also, if I do, I'd have to explain to him why I lied in the first place. I told him in he beginning I have a brother but he's in Israel working. If I do tell him, how long should I wait?
I'd appreciate anyone's opinions, thanks :)
I quit school and my boyfriend doesn't know...
Threads merged and edited
My issue is that I started college in September, did very well in the beginning, but because of mild depression/anxiety, the stress from school made my condition and school worse. In January I quit my program because it was so intense. I'm such a perfectionist. I felt so bad about it, because in reality I know I have the intelligence to do it. I got almost everything A's in first semester. So since we've met I've been telling him I still go to school, and should finish in January 2011. I just hate and can't keep lying to him! And I have a feeling he suspects something. I.e. one time we spent 9 days together and I said it's OK I could miss school. Or sometimes we'd spend Mondays together, or I'd stay up really late like till 3am. So he's probably wondering, how could she act like this when she's taking such an intense program? I plan to find a full-time job for now, and go to school later, maybe in September. HOW DO I TELL HIM SO THAT HE WON'T LOSE RESPECT FOR ME? I don't want him to think I'm stupid, incapable, or deprived. AND HOW DO I EXPLAIN TO HIM WHY I LIED TO HIM IN THE FIRST PLACE? I Don't WANT TO LOSE HIM. BUT I HAVE TO ADMIT TO HIM, SOONER THAN LATER.