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-   -   I really like this guy and I want to know if he will ever like me back. Its been so l (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=836772)

  • Jan 20, 2018, 05:18 PM
    Marylisak
    I really like this guy and I want to know if he will ever like me back. Its been so l
    I really like this guy but he doesn't like me back. I've liked him for about 2 and a half years, he is my best friends twin brother. I liked him in 5th and 6th grade and now I'm in 7th. But during 5th and 6th and the beginning of 7th grade he liked my twin sister. He was dating this girl in 7th grade and had a crush in 7th grade, but he doesn't rea;ly seem like the type of guy to date this early, if you know what I mean. ( were still in 7th grade now. We don't have any classes together right now but I see him all the time since his twin sister is me and my sisters best friend. And almost always when he sees me in the hall he says hi (my name), and we joke around a lot. I do have like a 0.01% crush on this other guy, but it's nothing compared to my real crush. We also text a lot, but I feel like he likes to text my sister and his friend more and longer. I want to know if I should just give up(which I've even tried thinking about the bad things about him and it still
    Doesn't work. I feel like its bad to stop liking someone just because they don't like you. Is there anything I can do, and I also know/feel like it's not good to change for someone or make someone like you. And I really want him to like me. I know that I'm kind of too young to understand love but I feel like I am really close to loving him. Any advice, anything I can do. Please, help!! I can never stop thinking about him.
  • Jan 20, 2018, 06:48 PM
    joypulv
    You say he liked your sister all through 5th, 6th, and the beginning of 7th? And you had a crush on him all that time? Wow, that's a long time for those grades.
    What does your sister say?

    If neither your sister nor your best friend is dating him (or whatever you want to call it), then sure, say something light and short to him.
    ''You know, I had a little crush on you for 2 years'' and just laugh a little and walk away.
    If he wants to know more, he'll let you know.
    Say it in person - no texting!
    You are right about not stopping liking someone who doesn't feel the same way towards you, but that doesn't include obsession. You are thinking about him too much. Be prepared for him never talking to you about it. Be prepared for a change in him. Or even a little 'talk' where he says he just likes you as a friend. BE PREPARED!

    There's a saying about young love: we protect ourselves by having crushes on unattainable people. That usually means either older, going with someone else, or showing no interest in us.
    During that time we learn little by little about romance and relationships. Of course we never stop learning.

    Good luck.
  • Jan 21, 2018, 12:54 AM
    Alty
    Let him know how you feel, and if he says he just wants to be friends, accept that and move on. It's hard when your crush doesn't feel the same way about you, but you can't force someone to like you just because you like them, and sometimes you have to settle for being just friends.

    I like Joys idea of telling him you have a crush on him and have had for 2 years and then just walking away and leaving the ball in his court. I wouldn't do anything too elaborate, that would just make it awkward if he rejects you. But a light little flirtatious, "just thought I'd tell you that I have a crush on you", then give a little laugh and say, "well, now you know. See you later". That way if he's interested he knows you are too, but if he's not then he doesn't have to come up with an excuse, he can just carry on the way he has been, which would be a very clear signal to you that he doesn't feel the same way.

    If he reciprocates your feelings, great. If not, stop obsessing about him and find someone that feels the same way. Enjoy being just his friend. Don't spend the next 2 years thinking only of him, there are other great guys out there, give them a chance.

    My son went through something like this when he was 12. He had a crush on a girl in his class. My son is very shy, but one day on a Friday, after school, he got up the courage to tell his crush that he liked her, and to ask her out. Instead of being honest with him she told him she'd tell him on Monday.

    So he sat at home all weekend hoping that she'd say yes, then worrying she'd say no, he was a nervous wreck all weekend. Come Monday she did everything to avoid him. On Tuesday he finally had a moment with her and she told him she wasn't interested she just wanted to be friends. He was crushed. Now, as a mom I didn't expect her to date him just because he liked her, and frankly I wasn't too keen on my 12 year old dating to begin with, he asked her before he got permission from me, but I was mad at how she handled it. She could have let him down as soon as he asked her, then he would have had the weekend to deal with it. Instead he came home on Tuesday completely crushed. Then again, how mad can I really be at a 12 year old girl that really had no idea how to handle this situation?

    I wish that was the end of it but he spent the next 3 years crushing on her, bought her Christmas gifts, birthday presents with his Christmas money, and Valentine's gifts, all of which she accepted, and she always treated him like crap. I was so happy when she changed schools.

    He finally got over her when after a year of being in different schools, no contact at all, she was at his school for a presentation or something, and when she saw him she came up to him and said, "oh, hi. I'm mad at you. My birthday was last week and you didn't even send me a present". His reply was, "you've never even given me a card for my birthday, or valentine's, or Christmas, so enjoy all the gifts I got you over the years, you won't be getting any more from me". After that the crush he still had, vanished instantly. :)
  • Jan 21, 2018, 03:33 PM
    Marylisak
    Thanks, but he only wants to be friends, but then he said to my sister who knows maybe ill like her in the future but my sister said that he says that about everyone and I think even her, this all happened before I even asked a question here. Thanks for answering!
  • Jan 21, 2018, 07:57 PM
    joypulv
    You sound pretty together for 7th grade. Good luck in life.
  • Jan 22, 2018, 07:46 PM
    Marylisak
    Thanks!! <3

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