Well hi I'm not shure how to start I am 39 and I have no friends.the older people in my life have made it very clear that I am a terible person when I ask them why they have problems with me they tell me they have no problems at all. Well recentley my motherinlaw passed away I was given letters that my step mother wrote her and they were telling how terible of a person I am but gave no explination eather well now I am having nightmares and driving myself crazy trying to figure out what my problem is. Does anyone even know how I would start to fix this problem? Thanks if you can help I would appritieate it a lot

Is there any possibility that you might just be paranoid and that the problem is with other people rather than yourself?

If the people who put you down have so many bad things to say about you then they should say it to you, not behind your back. The type of people who do such things aren't really worth worrying over.

Can you think of any qualities you have which people may find quite offensive? For example, it can be a good quality such as honesty. I am a very honest person and some people may dislike me because of that, but I'd rather that than they liked me because I lied.

I think you need to have it out with these people who dislike you. Tell them what you just said here. If they cannot give you a reason why they dislike you, maybe they have no reason to and it's time to move on and try to meet some new people.

A good place is to meet people are at local clubs, such as yoga, art... anything that may be of interest to you. Start getting to know new people and I am sure you will find out that there are lots of good things about you.

It is a big possibility you are just being paranoid, so tell yourself you're not a bad person. You know you're not because you havem't done something obviously horrible to make people dislike you. Be sure of yourself, and your ability to make friends.

I am not sure... but what I suspect is you may have a personality disorder...

Perhaps you are paranoid of being rejected/alone and you try hard (too hard) to make everybody like you... and sadly... when we try too hard to make everyone like us... we are unable to be ourselves... people resent us...

Have you ever felt you "do not know who you are anymore?"

Everyone has felt they don't know who they are, it's part of the process in which you try new things to find out who you are.