I've been dating this girl for about 5 yrs. I met her when I was 29 and she was 36. I took thing very slow to make sure she was the one.In the 5 yrs I have broken up with her twice and she has broken up with me at least 5-6 time she wanted to get married rite away I wanted to buy a house by myself to see what it was like to live on my own. That pissed her off and has been an roller coaster ride since then. When we where together I did a lot for her and her son.We didn't spend a lot of time together but we love each other very much.I do know she didn't cheat on me.But all the times she broke up and came back she said she was miserable without me and like wise with me.And her son talked about me when we were broken up and he missed me.I did make her mad sometimes.I bought a ring for her last march but gave it to her in August 2006. At this time I was going threw some very series back problems (in pain Alot) and worried about slowing down at work. So I wasn't jumping up and down when a proposed to her. She did like to spend money and didn't do a lot for me because of the house.But she is very good person. The first break up I did say some bad things about her to my friends and some don't like her because of that and her breaking up with me a lot. I spent a lot of money on the ring and gave her $2000.00 for new boobs in Jan. We got in a huge fight a couple of days after she got them done.It's been about six weeks since we e-mailed each other. In the email she said I broke up with her witch is not true. Then with some other excuses for breaking up with me she said I never loved her If I did I woud have been excited about the wedding planning the future telling my friend rite away that we got engaged I told them As I saw them.Her ex husband cheated on her and did a lot of thing to hurt her. But also told me That she was worried about him because he was a drug addict and was scared that he was going to die. She also said in one of the e-mails she loved me more then her Ex husband.She refuse to give the ring back and found out a couple of days ago from my sisters from what my ex's mom told them is she feels that we will be getting back together and I saw her mom about 3 weeks ago that she just comes home from work and lays around. She is a very busy person when she's happy. I guess what my question is she coming back and is she using the ring as away to control me. I love this woman and her son very much. I do know she loves me very much. She also said in e-mail I don't think we can give each other what we want. Even after all the break ups I can't get her out of my mind. I did go to a free pyhic and she believes we will be getting back together. She did say a lot about ex that was true. But I guess until she does come back then I will believe it. She signed up for match.com about 3 weeks after she broke up with me. Then I signed up about 3 weeks after her not really to find somebody but to let her read and see my profile. After she saw it it took her about a week to go back on.And believe it or not what we are looking for in a person from are profiles are same. I don't know if you believe in the signs when you are born but she is a Aries and I am a virgo and are personalities from what they say on them are 95% accurate. She did say once its not if I could live with you rather If I could live without you. So if some one can give me some advise or if you think she will be back again because I do want her back?

SAB123,

Is my ex coming back again? If she does, it won't be to stay. It will be because she needs something from you. Could you just be a friend to her and her son? Real friends try to avoid lending each other money - it damages relationships. Better to keep friendship and financiers apart.

".. she is a Aries and I am a Virgo.."

Truth? Aries are the children of the zodiac, the wanderers, searchers, always looking for something, never satisfied even when they find it. Always looking for something more interesting. Nothing wrong with that. Understand them and they can be great fun to be with. But life isn't always fun and they refuse to accept that. ~ Virgo is the people pleaser of the zodiac, hates to rock the boat, the soft touch, the nice guy, the worrier that he should be doing more but doesn't know what that is. Doesn't mind being told what to do, likes to receive direction, hates to be nagged, duty bound, feels obligated to do what he can for everyone but this can become too overwhelming at times and he must back off or get a serious headache.

The bond between is great, but the lack of understanding is greater.

Each have goals and desires, the other does not share. Neither modifies their own life plan to accommodate the other.

Until compromises are made, a healthy relationship can not be achieved.

People want many things in life, but in order to achieve them, sacrifices must be made.
You must decide what is most important. If you sacrifice for her, she will be yours.

I do know this in my heart but I don't think she would ever sacrfice for me. And she did email me today to get her son bed back.

Update my ex is driving buy my house a lot )4-5 times a week from what I see) she's waving and she even had her son wave to me. We were driving and we past each other. She looked rite at me, I didn't look at her but did have sun glasses on and moved my eyes when she looked at me. She looked pale and sad/ depressed. Every time she see's me in car she looks. And 3/4 of time when she drives past my house it is on purpose. Even her mom drives past looking. She was on match.com before she took it off a couple of days ago she changed/deleted her profile. Before she would not date any body who didn't have over 4 year degree or make over $75,000.00 a year. She will date any one with any income or any type of schooling including high school degree now. She is a very smart woman she changed it around to the point that she looks deperate and making herself look stupid. But before she went of I did notice her checking my profile out at least 3-4 times in about a week and half time. When she origianly broke up with me she didn't drive past house once. It has been over 4 months since she broke up with me and the past month and half she started driving buy again and drives more and more every week. All other break ups she has also done this and then comes back. I think she no's I'm very hurt still over this because their have maybe 8 times she has seen me just sitting their doing nothing. In the past she has said she is miserable withoutme in her life and said once to me it's not that I can live with you it's if I can live without you. I no we are not meant to be together but I still miss her and was wondering if anybody thinks she is coming back for the 6-7th time. (I lost track)

You can still just friend to your ex and her son and please avoid lending money. It will completely ruin your friendship.