I have been with my girlfriend for 2 and a half years now since I was 18. The past 6 months or more have been very up and down mainly silly arguments. The fact is that I am always wanting her company and 90% of the time she seems to love it. On thurday at the gym we had a argument... basically I wanted to go swimming with her as I just got off work and wanted to spend some time with her, she didn't want to due to her hair getting wet. So that night we made up as usual and all was fine. That night I left all my cloths at hers thus saving me going to mine first the next day to get the cloths for the week end I stay at hers. I told her on thurs that ill be up at 5ish as I finish early on Friday and she didn't seem bothered at all. So got up to hers at 5 and asked her how long she would be till she gets back from work. She said she is at her friends house so I said shall I come over then and she said if you want (im close friends with her firend and her b/f) this was really hard for me as I drove the 30min drive up to see her for the week end like our routine goes and she was off with me from the min I spoke. So I got round there and cut a long story short she snapped at me, I asked her streight what is wrong she said you just come up when you want to... I got the hump and took me g/f mates b/f to the gym for an hour. When I looked at my phone after the gym it said ' hi babe we haven't had any space since holiday that is why I am so moody I'm asking for some now so ill see you on Monday love you. Now this has happened too many times before and I got angry and switched from the persone I am (I would normaly ring her and text her asking if we are still going to be together etc what's wrong and get in a big big mess over it) and I basically said I'm f'ing sick of this we arnt getting on ant we don't work and I said you don't understand how much I love you and want to be with you etc but we just arnt working etc. so I just went home and couldn't stop crying to be fair. I just keep remebering out holiday which we didn't argue on at all it was great fun loved it. The night I went home she was going out with her mate to some club which is fine but I keep worrying that I have blown it! I keep worrying that she isn't feeling like I am having a great time with her mates and not even thinging of me and that even maby she thought f it last night and kissed or something else with another guy. You may all be thinging its only her asking for space for a bit but she as so many time said to me that she is so sorry she is a ***** to me when she sees me for so long she said she gets natty, she said she would prefer it if I was to treat her a bit more like **** and rebel to what she wants more she says your so nice to me but I don't aprechiate it, your too good for me and I don't deserve you. This is why I switched I can't take it any longer I drove up 30 minutes from my home to see her for the week end and then she tells me she want a break. So I went mad. Now I'm playing the waiting game for a call or text from her which I am so scared I won't get one! I can't see my life ahead without her I'm in a mess I have had dreams all night about her cheating on me when she went out and not caring that I'm not there. I'm so heart broken and just wanted to shout it all out, it may not make allot of sense but its just all built up over the past 6-8 months and I have got sick of being the one who does every thing for her. I will change and say that I'm not seeing her to day ill go out with my mates and she will realise what she is missing as it has happened before but then I get too attached again and can't let go. I just want us to talk again and no that she hasn't got off with any one else as she may be pissed off to what I said. I hate playing this waiting game and I'm going in to depression :( don't no what to do with myself...