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-   -   Can I go to foster care? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=822187)

  • Feb 26, 2016, 10:59 AM
    scared_kid
    Can I go to foster care?
    I am 13 years old and I live with my grandparents in Ohio. My granny is abusive, she calls me, fat , ugly, stupid, whore, etc. She told me that she wishes she wouldn't have gotten custody of me when I was 5. I was with my mom who was letting my stepdad hurt me. (break my nose, starve me etc.) she always tells me if it weren't for me then she wouldn't have paid for lawyers and she could still have her life savings. Everything between us was fine. But I started self harming. I go to school online so I have no friends, she was telling me she hated me, my grandpa never talks to me and I started cutting. She saw the cuts and basically lost 75% of any trust she had for me. She took my phone away, stopped letting me go to youth group and go to the neighbors and won't let me be home alone. After about two week she started to ease up. She gave me her old kindle and she let me talk to a couple friends again. But in those two weeks tortured me about why I did it. I was just reading my book one day and she ripped the kindle out of my hand. I had a immediate reaction type thing and I just said NOOO and then I held onto it. She eventually punched me until I let ago. (about three times) and she started reading my book. She then told me that she hated me, and she wanted to get rid of me. That she was going to send me to my dads. (I would be there but he's a recovering drug addict who's bi-polar and I hate) she threatens me all the time. Then last night she was like you need to dry and the dishes. It was 10:00 pm on a school night and I was REALLY tired. I grumbled and then she just went buck wild. She started screaming and sent me to my room after slamming my head on the counter and slapping my face and arms. She stood at my door telling me how she hated me and how I was a horrible kid and she was going to get rid of me. She makes me eat hot dogs and bologna all. The. Time. (I HATE BOLOGNA) and she knows I hate it so she makes me eat it. I'm too the point where I've been saving up all my money and I'm either going to act out so much she sends me somewhere else or just tell her I want to leave. I'm scared to go to foster care though. What should I do? I wanted to become emancipated at 16 but Ohio doesn't have that. I'm worried that I might end up with my mom, but she's on house arrest so I don't think they can do that. I'm really tired of crying myself to sleep at night please help me.
  • Feb 26, 2016, 11:03 AM
    Curlyben
    Sure, report your guardians to child services and let the wheel roll into motion...
  • Feb 26, 2016, 11:26 AM
    ScottGem
    You need to talk to a counselor at your school. They will either contact children's services or try to help in other ways.
  • Feb 26, 2016, 11:31 AM
    Wondergirl
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by ScottGem View Post
    You need to talk to a counselor at your school. They will either contact children's services or try to help in other ways.

    Good idea, but the OP said she attends school online.
  • Feb 26, 2016, 11:51 AM
    ScottGem
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Wondergirl View Post
    Good idea, but the OP said she attends school online.

    I missed that, but then she also said "It was 10:00 pm on a school night". Hmm.

    So then she needs to talk to a clergy person, or directly contact Family Services.
  • Feb 26, 2016, 12:15 PM
    scared_kid
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by ScottGem View Post
    I missed that, but then she also said "It was 10:00 pm on a school night". Hmm.

    So then she needs to talk to a clergy person, or directly contact Family Services.

    I go to school online, so I have teachers and everything. I have to check in at a certain time everyday.

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Curlyben View Post
    Sure, report your guardians to child services and let the wheel roll into motion...


    I'm really afraid that they will get angry and shout at me, or that ill get sent to me mom which would be v v v bad
  • Feb 26, 2016, 01:52 PM
    ScottGem
    You asked for our help. Either you do call children's services or talk to another adult, like a school counselor or clergy person or you endure what you are going through. There are no other alternatives.
  • Feb 26, 2016, 02:01 PM
    Alty
    This won't be easy, but you can't just declare that you want to go into foster care. The system is there for a reason. You have to work within the system, and hope for the best. That's the only way you can do this.

    Unless the abuse is extreme and evident, this could take a long time, or it may not happen at all. But the only way to have a chance of getting out of that home and into another as a foster child, is to go through the system. That means that child services needs to get involved.
  • Feb 26, 2016, 08:04 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    I see this somewhat different, a girl who for some reason started to self harm. Her grandmother found it, and started to punish her for this behavior.
    The young girl fought and argued back.
    When asked to give her grandmother her electronics, she refused, physically fought back when they tried to take it.

    It seems like the girl has really bought on a lot of this trouble her self by not accepting the punishment.

    Now anger on both sides, and she is not saying the words she told the grandmother and the yelling and what else she has done.

    But the system is designed to keep you in the home, with you, and/or the guardians getting guidance, counseling or more.

    If you disobey, you will receive punishment, trust is easy lost and hard to gain back.

    How about telling grandmother you are sorry, and start doing what you are told

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