I was away one weekend and my best friend and my boyfriend met up and had sex. Nobody told me, my whole friendship group knew about it but nobody said anything to me because 'it wasn't their business to tell'. Some friends they are..
So I was still with my boyfriend and still best friends with this girl. I had no idea , I would never have guessed it in a million years. They never showed any signs. So about 4 months later I break up with my boyfriend for other reasons. Then about 2 weeks after the break up, my best friend decides this is a good time to tell me about her and my ex having sex. Even though she had a boyfriend at the time (and is still with him now)
I was absolutely speechless. She wrote me a letter saying how sorry she was and ra ra ra.
I couldn't deal with the lack of trust in my friendship group so I changed groups. And even though my 'best friend' had said in her letter that she would do anything to make it up to me, when I started hanging out with other people she didn't even seem to care.
I hang out with different people now and I like it, but it just sucks to not have a 'best friend' that you can go to about anything.
And my ex best friend went straight into another group and is best friends with some girl, and she always seems like she is enjoying life so much, its not right. Why should she get to be having such a good time when she did THAT to her 'best friend'
It doesn't make sense. I'm still soooo angry.

As well you should be. But don't dwell on what she is doing, she may seem to be having a good time, for now, but life tends to even things out, especially if she keeps cheating on her boyfriend by having casual sex with the boyfriends of her friends. She will lose her new friends as well.

The anger will subside, and who knows what will happen when her boyfriend finds out he is with a cheater. I doubt she will seem so happy then. So don't hold on to that anger to long, because it will stop you from enjoying your new friends. She will get hers, no worry.

I can understand the anger in you right now.. its hurtful to get betrayed by friends especially a best friend.. 4 months is not a long time, but time will heal.. I always believe what comes around goes around.. karma is going to bite this girl one day.. just like what talaniman said don't let someone (who doesn't worth any of your time and energy) to stop you from enjoying your life... :)

I'd tell her boyfriend if only for his sake.

Looks can be deceiving. She may not be as happy as you want to picture her being. Anger can do many things including causing you to see things as a poke at you when in reality they have nothing to do with you or your life.

He is out of your life.
Your old friends are out of your life.
She is out of your life.

Time to get out of theirs.

Yes, you were betrayed by THEM. Not just her. Yes, the anger is normal. However, holding on to the anger is not healthy and I get the impression you have had time to begin letting go and moving on.

Holding on to the anger toward her will sooner or later cause problems with how you perceive the interactions of your new group of friends. You will begin wondering if one of them will betray you or if the whole group is plotting against you. Instead of allowing that to happen, get to really know your new friends and make some outside of any 'group'. You might just find a new 'best friend' if you start doing what you like with your life that maybe you didn't feel encouraged to do before all this happened.

You're better off doing no contact with your ex boyfriend and your past group of friends. Check out the no contact related threads in my signature. Though the threads talk mostly about healing from a break up. No contact works for your situation too. You're in pain from the past, as you have been betrayed.

I believe that it's a good idea for you to keep them out of your life. The more updates you get about their lives, the more you will dwell on the past and the longer it will take for you to move on with your life.

No contact = no updates

No updates = nothing to analyze

Nothing to analyze = more time with your new friends and many other things

You said it yourself, you found a new group of friends to hang out with, so be grateful for that.

She may not be doing as well as you think, but you cannot hold on to this anger. It does no good and you are the one who is miserable.
Go on with your life and your new friends, this will fade away.

That's a devastating thing to go through. Not only have you lost your boyfriend, but also your best friend.

One thing you have to remember is that it's not your fault. It's going to be hard to get over and to ever trust anyone ever again.

Your ex-best friend, was obviously not a TRUE friend, because a true friend would have resisted the temptation.

Try not to let this interfere with any future relationships that you may encounter, everybody is different. Use it as a learning experience and try your best not to let it drag you down.

With every ending comes a new beginning, and it's what you make of it. Concentrate on your new group of friends and just forget her. Another "best friend" will come your way and hopefully will be a trustworthy one.

Be glad you are rid of them and the others.

This sucks for sure, Being deceived is the worst. I know. Being clouded is another. I know that too.

No more time wasting on either one of them. Let them have each other, they deserve it.

Bad energy.

The good thing is that now you can find (and look out for) the good ones.

Be the strong one here. Use this to better yourself.

Sometimes life gives us these bouts of heartache. All for a reason.

To learn.

Some Friend! You're better off without her and him.

I almost had the same situation with my best friend I was away like you were and she had sent him a picture in just her bra and I had found out that they were sending nasty texts so we broke up my advice just don't be friends with her and stay away from him

Quote:

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Originally Posted by baybay223

i almost had the same situation with my best friend i was away like u were and she had sent him a picture in just her bra and i had found out that they were sending nasty texts so we broke up my advice just dont be friends with her and stay away from him

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Hello baybay,

This is a very old post. So make sure you check dates at the top. Thank you for your advice and welcome to AMHD:)