I was wondering if any of you can help me. Here is the situation. We have been trying to have a baby for over 2 yrs. I got a call the other day from a friend who knows someone that wants us to adopt their grandchild. The baby is currently in foster care and the parents rights have been terminated. The bio grandmother wants to adopt the child (since she has already gone through the foster care program and had a home study done) then sign the rights over to my husband and I making us the baby's legal parents. Otherwise we would have to take classes and become foster parents FIRST, Plus we live in a different county so I doubt the baby would even be placed w/ us. Has anyone ever heard of doing this before? Once a person adopts a child can they sign over right in a private adoption?? I hope I asked my question clear enough for some answers. Lol

Thanks!

By the way we are in the state of Indiana if that makes a difference.

I would say I know enough to know I don't know the answer to this.

IF you did not live in another country I would just say do the foster parent and go though the system.
But I would discuss this with an adoption attorney, I can just think of a 100 things that could go wrong.

I agree with fr. Chuck. I"d check with an adoption attorney. There are private adoptions. But its always best to get your legal rights explained to you. There are things that can go wrong including the grand ma changing her mind.

Having experience with foster care, I'll say that you really do want the training... it's hard enough to raise kids without them coming pre-packaged with issues. That's less of a concern with infants, of course. Our experience was that the adoption process for foster kids is fairly long (of course, my nieces were 5 and 14 when they were adopted, so they actually got some say in the matter) to ensure a good fit with the family. The state may also have something to say about the adoptive parent just turning around and giving the kid away like that... they do keep records, and would probably be very curious as to what happened to this child if the first adopter ever wanted to keep foster kids again.

Seek an adoption attorney. That's the only way you're going to know for sure what limitations there would be on what you want to do. My gut feeling, though, is that this is a bad idea.

I have to say I'm surprised that the state would place the child with a family member when the parents' rights have been terminated... that's usually something that they avoid, since that has the potential of putting the child right back in the vicinity of the birth parents.

Thank you so much for your advise. We will be contacting a lawyer to further explain our choices. Thank you again!

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Originally Posted by Tabi

I was wondering if any of you can help me. Here is the situation. We have been trying to have a baby for over 2 yrs. I got a call the other day from a friend who knows someone that wants us to adopt their grandchild. The baby is currently in foster care and the parents rights have been terminated. The bio grandmother wants to adopt the child (since she has already gone through the foster care program and had a home study done) then sign the rights over to my husband and I making us the babys legal parents. Otherwise we would have to take classes and become foster parents FIRST, Plus we live in a different county so I doubt the baby would even be placed w/ us. Has anyone ever heard of doing this before? Once a person adopts a child can they sign over right in a private adoption??? I hope I asked my question clear enough for some answers. lol

Thanks!

By the way we are in the state of Indiana if that makes a difference.

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Not sure I am wanting my son to be adopted my my husband. He is from Indiana too. What part are you from? Anyway, each state is different with their laws. So, depends on your state. On how to approch that question. Valerie

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Originally Posted by motherof4

Not sure I am wanting my son to be adopted my my husband. He is from Indiana too. What part are you from? Anyway, each state is diffrent with their laws. So, depends on your state. On how to approch that question. Valerie

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Northeast. Near Chicago. What area are you from?

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Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

I would say I know enough to know I don't know the answer to this.

IF you did not live in another country I would jus

t say do the foster parent and go though the system.
But I would discuss this with an adoption attorney, I can just think of a 100 things that could go wrong.

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Pssst Chuck, She says county not country:D You gave good advice still though!

I think they should get an attorney and discuss this procedure with the Foster care company... although my guess they will not agree to it since it is bypassing their classes and placement procedures


Tabi, I think you should go through the foster care system- that way you WILL be prepared to adopt another child if this child is adopted by someone else.

Or what if the grandmother adopts the child, takes care of it until the classes are done, then you can both go to the adoption agency and work things out then. I think that would be the best choice for the child. If you try to just adopt straight from the grandmother, then the foster agency gets upset and takes the child... well that leaves broken hearts all around...

Best Wishes!