Molestation by neighbor or not
I have always believed my neighbor did something to me, but I don't know for sure. I only have a few flashbacks of scenes in my head, that have been there since I was young. I don't know if I should go into detail about them or not, I mean I don't mind writing about it, but don't know if I should. I was at this neighbor's house ALL the time. I only went inside the house a few times that I remember. I was always outside playing. My neighbor was always outside working on something. We lived there for a long time... 10 or so years, so I grew up there. I have always wondered if they way I am now is because of something he did then. For the last week or so I have those same scenes in my head, but this time it makes me cry for no reason. I don't know why this is. I can't really afford therapy right now and don't know if I really want therapy. I'm just wondering if there is possibly a way for me to remember more or if there is a way to make myself remember. I just want to know everything and get this crap out of my system. I do remember having a conversation when I was 10 to my friends in the neighborhood and I remember telling them that he did things to me, but that is all I remember telling them.
Is it possible that I am making all of this up in my head and that is why I can't remember? If so, why would I make this up?
I can give more details if that is needed to help answer my question. This neighbor is a respected man, goes to church, served in the army, etc. He is a likeable person of course etc, etc.