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-   -   I think I can't get pregnant (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=726319)

  • Jan 5, 2013, 09:55 PM
    Synnen
    There are so many different factors that it would be difficult to go into here--it would be a very good conversation to have with your OB/GYN.

    For instance, I have Poly-Cystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) and endometriosis. Either one is a fertility inhibitor alone, but together it makes it VERY difficult to get pregnant. PCOS can be determined during an ultrasound. Endometriosis is usually only found during surgery, though you can be diagnosed just with symptoms.

    And honey--I'm 38. I had my son after TEN YEARS of trying. I would have liked to have had a child by the time I was 26 as well, but it doesn't always work that way. If you have tried consistently to have a child and have not conceived, it is time to see a doctor for more specialized advice for YOU, with a full checkup and discussion of your medical background.
  • Jan 5, 2013, 09:57 PM
    Synnen
    By the way, it took a lot of tests, surgery, hormonal treatment, monthly doctor appointments, scheduled sex, and a lot of heartache before I was pregnant. My depression nearly cost me my marriage, and I did lose a lot of friends along the way because of my bitterness and emotional roller coaster.

    I suggest that you ALSO talk with a counselor after you have discussed all of your options with your OB/GYN, especially if you DO have any fertility issues that need to be addressed.
  • Jan 6, 2013, 12:44 AM
    J_9
    I'm so glad Synnen was here to help you. She has walked the walk and can talk the talk! I was on my kindle and I hate typing on that keyboard so I keep my answers simple.

    I do want to stress though that not all infertility is due to the woman. Just so you don't get depressed over all of this. Men can have problems as well. It is just as important for him to get tested as well as you.
  • Jan 6, 2013, 08:24 AM
    Synnen
    J_9 is right---it's VERY important that he get tested as well. The odds are that it could be HIS problem as easily as it could be YOUR problem. And frankly, there's also a chance that it's just the two of you together--for whatever reason, some people are not fertile together though their bodies are separately.

    There ARE treatments, though, for most conditions. And if there isn't for your particular situation--"your" being BOTH of you---then you should both get counseling about it together and decide whether you love each other enough to either not have kids, or have kids in other ways than giving birth to them--like fostering, adopting, or volunteering with agencies such as Big Brother/Big Sister. It's heart-wrenching to deal with alternatives, but you don't have to give birth to be a parent, and you really do need to remember that if you do have fertility issues.

    So your first step is that BOTH of you go see a doctor and get preliminary tests done.

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