Ask Me Help Desk - What do I need to survive pregnancy and new baby?

Quote:

Originally Posted by DoulaLC

It is normal to feel that way....some women will even put off getting pregnant because they are concerned about the weight gain. You are making healthy food choices and getting some regular exercise.....those will have a greater impact than the weight you gain. You've gained right around what would be expected by this time so you are right on track.

Focus on your good eating and exercising. If you wanted, maybe join an exercise class with other pregnant women, or a preganancy yoga class. That way you will be able to share concerns and ideas with other pregnant women and get to see the many shapes and sizes that come with pregnancy.

That's a great idea. I really need to connect with more pregnant women. I know a few, but they are either larger women to begin with or really skinny. I feel so large compared to everyone else probably because I don't know anyone my size. It'd be great to see how other women look as they go along in this pregnancy process. I just started attending a new church, and at my old church, everyone was getting pregnant as I left and so far all of them are barely showing.

Thanks for the encoragement. I feel so much better. I was looking online and it said that you should gain between 3-6lbs during the first trimester and that really freaked me out! It's good to hear you say that I'm right on track. I trust you because you're a professional. I've had people in my family tell me that I shouldn't be gaining anything until the last trimester and that if I am, it's all my fault. I've also had one of my family members say, "I thought you were having a boy until I see how fat you've gotten." This is probably why I was feeling so bad.

I'm going to post my pregnany pic on my profile. You tell me if I look that bad.:p

Don't worry about the weight. I know it's hard not to. I started at 193 (at 5ft7, that was way too high for me and the biggest I had ever been) and ended at about 250. I ate healthy foods, only ate when I was hungry, but still gained a lot of weight. Initially, ever pound hurt me. But I threw out my scale in the second trimester and decided that I was going to just let it be.

However, breast feeding is the best weight loss tool I've ever found. I lost all of my pregnancy weight within the first seven months just by eating only when I'm hungry. I didn't restrict myself, I actually ate less healthy post pregnancy. Sixteen months later, I weigh in at 168. Still a little bigger than I'd like to be but the last thirteen pounds will come off now that I've taken up yoga (LOVE it).

So relax, throw your scale away, and it'll all melt off after you have the baby.

Quote:

Originally Posted by GirlWSlingshot

Don't worry about the weight. I know it's hard not to. I started off at 193 (at 5ft7, that was way too high for me and the biggest I had ever been) and ended at about 250. I ate healthy foods, only ate when I was hungry, but still gained a lot of weight. Initially, ever pound hurt me. But I threw out my scale in the second trimester and decided that I was going to just let it be.

However, breast feeding is the best weight loss tool I've ever found. I lost all of my pregnancy weight within the first seven months just by eating only when I'm hungry. I didn't restrict myself, I actually ate less healthy post pregnancy. Sixteen months later, I weigh in at 168. Still a little bigger than I'd like to be but the last thirteen pounds will come off now that I've taken up yoga (LOVE it).

So relax, throw your scale away, and it'll all melt off after you have the baby.

It is hard not to think about it. People say, "How far along are you", and I say 3 months and they look at my stomach and stretch their eyes." Haa haa It is rather funny if I wasn't so darn sensitive.

Thing is, I don't even own a scale, the only way I know how much I weigh is when I go to a doctor or a friend's house. You are so right about throwing it out, though cause if I did own one, I would get on it a zillion times a day. Hee Hee

I told the nurses not to tell me my weight because if I knew the numbers I would obsess.

And disregard any looks you get from people when they ask how far along you are. Every woman looks different at different stages in pregnancy. Google "pregnant belly pictures" and look at all the different types of bellies at different weeks. There are lots of galleries of pictures of women at each different week of pregnancy. It's comforting to see that each one looks different.

Quote:

Originally Posted by GirlWSlingshot

I told the nurses not to tell me my weight because if I knew the numbers I would obsess.

And disregard any looks you get from people when they ask how far along you are. Every woman looks different at different stages in pregnancy. Google "pregnant belly pictures" and look at all the different types of bellies at different weeks. There are lots of galleries of pictures of women at each different week of pregnancy. It's comforting to see that each one looks different.

Haa haa good idea regarding my visits to the doctors office.

Yeh, I go to those galleries once every couple of weeks. I wish people would post before pregnancy pictures too.

The ones I want to see are the after photos! I want to see other stretch-marked bellies to make me feel less out of place. Sometimes I feel like the only woman who lost all the weight but has to deal with all the crepe-y, sagging stomach skin.

** Shhh... I have a confession. One part of my lower belly is so scarred from stretch marks that I don't even have feeling there. I can pinch and twist the skin without even feeling it. Weird huh? Lol **

Quote:

Originally Posted by GirlWSlingshot

The ones I want to see are the after photos! I want to see other stretch-marked bellies to make me feel less out of place. Sometimes I feel like the only woman who lost all the weight but has to deal with all the crepe-y, sagging stomach skin.

** Shhh... I have a confession. One part of my lower belly is so scarred from stretch marks that I don't even have feeling there. I can pinch and twist the skin without even feeling it. Weird huh? lol **

See, this is the kind of stuff they don't show on TV and your friends never tell you. People say, awww, it's so wonderful! And, it's all worth it in the end. But they never tell you what the "end" is really like. I am so honest with people. I tell them, "Yeh, I poop all the time and it smells really bad. Also, whatever I eat, I can smell it when I pee." These are things people don't share, but I want my friends to see that it's not all fun and games and you really have to know what you're getting into. Most people see other pregnant women and say, "I wanna have a baby." They just really like the idea of it and don't realize all that goes on with the reality. My mom gave me the real deal growing up, so I was never anxious to have children until it was time.

I have two teenage sisters and I am a big proponent of open and honest conversations. They've gotten to see how amazing having a child can be but also get to see the stuff like the time he projectile vomited repeatedly and without warning in Baby Gap, drenching me from head to toe.

Even with the saggy boobs and belly, the fact that I've smelled vaguely of milk for the past 16 months of breastfeeding, I have only had a few real nights of sleep in the last two years, and I never get a chance to take a leisurely shower, I would do it all over again in a heartbeat. He is worth every stretchmark. But most people sugar coat that. I figure, the bad stuff makes the love I have for him all the more important and valuable.

Quote:

Originally Posted by CrissyDi

ok everyone, this is serious. I think. I'm having a really hard time with accepting my pregnancy weight gain. Some days I feel really depressed about it and I don't wanna go anywhere or be seen by anyone. I feel like a buffalo. I'm 5'1 and my best weight is 120, but because of birthcontrol I was 135 before I got pregnant. I just entered my second trimester and I'm 154. I feel like this way too much weight, but I'm not eating unhealthy. My Ob says that I am fine and she's not concerned about my weight gain. My mom says it's all water weight. But I still feel fat and ugly. What do I do? I keep praying I will loose weight and my hubby says that it's not normal and I have a problem. I've always been very weight conscious and try to control my wieght through diet and excercise. Before I got married I started birthcontrol and it made it hard for me to trim down once gaining. I got off of it 9 months before getting pregnant and the last time we decided to get off of it, it almost took a year for my body to return to normal and drop the weight. So, before I could drop it this time, I got pregnant, so I started off heavier than I would like and now I just feel like it's crazy. I'm eating when I feel hungry because I don't want to starve myself or my baby. (4-5 times a day- sometimes it's just grapefruit and cereal or eggs and some flat bread) I excercise 3 days a week- 30minutes of cardio and then 15minutes of pushups and squats and I stretch before and after. How can I loose weight and not harm the baby? Is it normal to feel this way?

Do not worry about your weight. Your body is doing an amazing thing right now and your baby and body do need the nourishment. We spend the majority of our lives counting calories, watching our carb intake, constantly exercising, trying so hard to stay in our skinny jeans that it is okay for you go through weight gain sometimes, ESPECIALLY during pregnancy (thats a given right?). So just embrace what a wonderful thing your body is doing (even though it doesn't feel too great right now) and what a gift you get at the end of it all. So what if you gain 15lbs or 50lbs through the entire pregnancy. Either way you can and WILL lose it. Your pregnant right now and everyone should understand that means weight gain and if they don't, well screw them. With my first I gained over 50lbs. I'm 5'6 and started at about 135ish prepregnancy. I had an athletic figure from being a swimmer so I was pretty happy with my body. In my third trimester I gained a ton of weight, I had horrible break outs (I've always had clear skin so this was new to me), I felt fat and disgusting. I didn't even want to go anywhere or do anything. I felt depressed. Now that I look back at it I realize I was just wasting time and energy getting all upset about my weight gain. I had my son and lost a little over 25lbs in the delivery room (I had preeclampsia and a TON of water retention) right away. Then within the next few weeks I lost another 15lbs and I wasn't even trying. When my son was 4 months, I had only a little less then 10lbs to lose to be back at prepregnancy weight, but thenI found out I was pregnant again.
So don't even stress about your weight gain. It's not worth worrying or getting upset about because when you see your baby you'll know it was all worth it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by CrissyDi

See, this is the kind of stuff they don't show on TV and your friends never tell you. People say, awww, it's so wonderful! And, it's all worth it in the end. But they never tell you what the "end" is really like. I am so honest with people. I tell them, "Yeh, I poop all the time and it smells really bad. Also, whatever I eat, I can smell it when I pee." These are things people don't share, but I want my friends to see that it's not all fun and games and you really have to know what you're getting into. Most people see other pregnant women and say, "I wanna have a baby." They just really like the idea of it and don't realize all that goes on with the reality. My mom gave me the real deal growing up, so I was never anxious to have children until it was time.

I was so shocked when I had my son that my belly did not go down. I expected to walk out of the hospital able to fit in non-maternity clothes, but that didn't happen. The day after my son was born I looked at my belly and I asked the doctor if there was another one in there. They laughed at me and explained how it takes time for it all to go back to normal. There was so much nobody told me about pregnancy.

Wow, yeah, everyone has such great comments! Keep it comin' folks cause I want to know what I'm dealing with. I'm compiling a list of things to pray against. Hee Hee

Quote:

Originally Posted by GirlWSlingshot

However, breast feeding is the best weight loss tool I've ever found.

I hope this is the case for me. My boobs were already very large. Now they are even bigger and I am only 6 months.

CrissyDi... here is a pic of me before and during at 4 1/2 months. I thought I was big at 4 1/2 months... and a month and a half later I thought I was going to be huge... but it seems to have evened out.

Maybe you'll even out in the next months :)

The adage, nine months on/nine months off comes to mind... :) For some women it happens much sooner, for some it takes a bit longer, but the point is, it will happen.

True, for some it will seem to melt off after baby and for others they will have to really work at it, but that is how it is whether pregnant or not.

Quote:

Originally Posted by southerngalps

i hope this is the case for me. my boobs were already very large. now they are even bigger and i am only 6 months.

You're so cute! Seriously, adorable.

I was a 36DD when I got pregnant. At the end of my pregnancy I was spilling out of a 38F even though it was too big around. Now at 16 months post pregnancy, I'm down to a full 34DD. So I actually went down a little after the pregnancy. So the tatas will get even more huge than you could imagine (when my milk came in I looked like Dolly Parton), but they will go down again. I promise. Lol

Quote:

Originally Posted by GirlWSlingshot

You're so cute! Seriously, adorable.

I was a 36DD when I got pregnant. At the end of my pregnancy I was spilling out of a 38F even though it was too big around. Now at 16 months post pregnancy, I'm down to a full 34DD. So I actually went down a little after the pregnancy. So the tatas will get even more huge than you could imagine (when my milk came in I looked like Dolly Parton), but they will go down again. I promise. lol

Thanks for the compliment... I don't feel cute :eek:

I hope my tatas get smaller... I've always hated having big ones :eek:

Southern, your 4 1/2 mth pic is how I've been looking since 2 months! But you are right, I have seemed to slow down.

How far along are you?

It really has evened out for me.

Don't forget that taking walks is key.

It will help with your weight and your delivery :)

Southern-Yeh, I have been doing the treadmill 3 times a week. I want to go more, but I'm still spontaneously throwing up if I move around too much and haven't eaten enough food. I'm still trying to balance everything.

How did you attach the photos? When I click insert a pic on my thingie, it asks for a url and it won't let me cut and paste.

I'm 13 weeks. Your boobs do not looks big! I started at a 34 DD and I don't know where I am now, but they are huge! My boobs are more pregnant than my belly! Hee Hee

Right now I am posting a quick answer and underneath there is GO ADVANCED.

Click that and then click MANAGE ATTATCHMENTS. Then it will take you to the browse option so you can download a pic from your computer.

I felt big a 13 weeks. It just seems to keep evening out :)

The first pic is me before pregnancy.
The second is at 12 weeks.