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Seem's okay now - but we're still not using the tub/shower. Not feeling at all confident about the caulk/grout issue (not that I want to get that debate started again!) with daily, multiple use, and looking into the possibility of redoing the whole thing. Not sure I can quite wrap my head around that yet, but it is a thought.
I'm grateful for all the valuable input - K
My gut tells me the tile job is likely water tight and would be servicable -- A quick way to tell would be to run the shower for 30 minutes while the ceiling down below is still open and visually check for leaks.