Ask Me Help Desk - Baby Mama Drama!

Quote:

Originally Posted by sabrewolfe

Keep taking her back for contempt of the court order. After a while, they will probably grant him custody if she keeps breaking the courts decisions and if that's what he wants. Let me ask you something, what would you like to see happen?

Why would I be on here for advice if I didn't want her to be part of his life. Every gift we've given her, she has taken it back for money. It's really sad to hear the girl tell us this. I mean we want to be part of her life, but she makes it so complicated. We don't have money to hire an attorney and keep taking her back to court. What other solution do we have that doesn't require a lot of money?

You don't necessarily need a lot of money to fight her contempt. Look into legal aide, or see if you can file a complaint of contempt with the court yourselves. This girls mother doesn't sound too reasonable, but at the same time, I don't know all sides of the story. That's for the courts to decide. Now, the issue at hand is whether you and especially your husband is dedicated to this child or not. If he is, he will find a way and do what is necessary. If not, he will give into excuses and give up his child.
Iam simply coming from a standpoint of experience here. I have three children with my ex, and yes, she is a pain at times too. She has played her little games with me, she even offered to hire an attorney with her boyfriend so as I could sign my rights off to them and not have to pay child support anymore. Well it took me about a split second to tell her where to go. I will never give up on my children no matter what I go through. I've taken her in for contempt before, and she was told if she violates the order one more time, she will lose any custody rights she has with them. She can play all the games she wants, but she won't get over on the law.

Quote:

Originally Posted by sabrewolfe

You don't necessarily need alot of money to fight her contempt. Look into legal aide, or see if you can file a complaint of contempt with the court yourselves. This girls mother doesn't sound too reasonable, but at the same time, I don't know all sides of the story. That's for the courts to decide. Now, the issue at hand is whether you and especially your husband is dedicated to this child or not. If he is, he will find a way and do what is necessary. If not, he will give into excuses and give up his child.
Iam simply coming from a standpoint of experience here. I have three children with my ex, and yes, she is a pain at times too. She has played her little games with me, she even offered to hire an attorney with her boyfriend so as I could sign my rights off to them and not have to pay child support anymore. Well it took me about a split second to tell her where to go. I will never give up on my children no matter what I go through. I've taken her in for contempt before, and she was told if she violates the order one more time, she will lose any custody rights she has with them. She can play all the games she wants, but she won't get over on the law.

Well the other thing is the mother is now married with two other kids. She wants him to sign off his rights, but also want to get him for child abandonment, which I don't understand. He's always pay his child support faithfully. She says she doesn't need him for anything. He also hasn't been in contact with the child for a while. How should he deal with this now?

Quote:

Originally Posted by mrsmama01

Well the other thing is the mother is now married with two other kids. She wants him to sign off his rights, but also want to get him for child abandonment, which I don't understand. He's always pay his child support faithfully. She says she doesn't need him for anything. He also hasn't been in contact with the child for a while. How should he deal with this now?

She's just trying to suck every bit of money out of him and generally make his life hell.

You NEED to file for contempt.

She will have no choice but to allow visitation.

If she continues to violate a court order then custody can be taken away from her.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mrsmama01

Well the other thing is the mother is now married with two other kids. She wants him to sign off his rights, but also want to get him for child abandonment, which I don't understand. He's always pay his child support faithfully. She says she doesn't need him for anything. He also hasn't been in contact with the child for a while. How should he deal with this now?

He needs to write down all the dates he tried to see her or was suppose to see her and the mother refused. He needs to prove that it was her that prevented him from seeing his daughter. Prove to the court that she was trying to make it appear that he was not spending time with her by her games.
Signing papers to do away with his rights will only make his daughter think he didn't want anything to do with her in the long run.

As long as there is a possibility that he can establish a relationship with his daughter, then he is making a big mistake in signing away his rights.

As to allowing her to move to another country, that will essentially accomplish the same thing, because he may face so many hurdles in establishing a long distance relationship it would be impossible. Again, it is a mistake to allow that to happen.

Because he is her legal father, he has legal rights. He needs to exercise those rights for all the right reasons.

This has nothing to do with what he wants, or his baby's mother, or his current situation.

This is to do with a child that should have an active father in her life. It's not optional.

I hope he steps up and makes that happen.

He can't signs his rights away so that option is thrown out the window.

Sorry he is going through this but I feel more sorry for the child because the mother is using her as a pawn. The child is the only one that loses.

This is why you have to be careful who you have a child with. The only thing I can suggest is to get a good lawyer and go back to court. This is his child and he shouldn't give up because the mother is acting childish. As a father he has rights no matter what the mother say or do.

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