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Okay, heard from the ex for the first time in 4 months yesterday. She texted me saying we need to meet up to close a joint bank account which we had together. I have NO idea how to act with this; I know I should be civil to her, but after what she did I want to give it to her with both barrels. Its weird, you think you're over them, then something like this comes up and you're right back in the thick of it again. Anyone else been in a similar situation? I'm completely stumped.
Handle your business in a professional manner, and get back to your life, and leave the drama for the soaps. If you can't, let her deal with it her way.
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Originally Posted by talaniman
Easier said than done.
My ex decides to cut ties with me.. so I'm dragging her mom into getting my stuff back
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Originally Posted by hjpan
But they decided to be 8itch about it and not return my stuff
I told my ex's mom that her daughter is a liar and trash.
I told my ex that she won't succeed in the future if she keeps going on living her life.
So, I won't get stuff back~ But I do plan on ruining my ex's life cause there's cause and consequence.
"There is a possibility that someone could fall in love over the internet.
I met my ex-boyfriend through this site. We lasted about 14 to 15 months. During that time we each visited each other in San Diego, CA and Sarasota, FL.
Though many relationships are different mine was more of a mutual. I thought I loved the guy but in reality I never did, that's why I ended the relationship.
But there is a possibility, in my opinion anyways."
That what she wrote.. LoL
That's bs HJ, if she never loved you why the hell was she with you for 15 months? Where did you find this, if you don't mind me asking? It seems odd that she would write that unless she was specifically trying to make a point, most likely aiming it at you. You're better off without that woman by the sounds of it bud.
Regarding ruining her life, I know exactly what you mean; but what goes around comes around, it always does, so there's no need to do anything. I met with my ex today for the first time in God knows how long. In the run up to this I've had thoughts of what I was going to say and do, most of which involved saying something really nasty about her or her new boyfriend. But when I saw her today, something happened and I suddenly became cheerful, and couldn't help but tell her about all the good things that have happened recently (without sounding like that's what I was trying to do). She then proceeded to tell me that breaking up with me was a bad decision. I played it cool. Me-1, her-0. As they say "living well is the best revenge".
As you may have noticed I'm in that brief happy stage you get after contacting the ex, before the depression kicks in a few days later. Whoopy!
When I first saw that, I felt like crap but I realized I didn't do anything wrong except we argued over issues. I found her post on another public forum about internet relationships/online relationships/long-distance. I totally agree that I'm better off that 8itch xD.Quote:
Originally Posted by jammyb
*sigh* It just frustrates me that her mother flatters me a lot.. But now I realize this is all a joke. My ex is using her family as a shield to get me away from her..
I told her mom and the ex that I won't be surprised to see them in destitute as well as the ex getting pregnant and the boyfriend running off...
well.. I got part of my anger off my chest...
Well my ex texted me again yesterday nearly two weeks since our night of romance (if that's what you'd call it).. I didn't text back until today..
We chatted about some stuff, (we actually did a bit of flirting).. then I told her I was going away and I'd text her later.. a few hours later I text her.. but she was with her friend (when she's with her friend it's hard to talk to her, never mind text her) so I told her I was going to bed.
What should I do next? Wait for her to text me again or make contact first this time? I like talking to her and I know we can't get back together but she still is the girl that is mostly on my mind and I wouldn't mind meeting with her.
I don't know what her intentions are.. we bumped into each other on a night out (the place was crawling with sexy girls and probably boys but we both ended up with each other all night), she told me she still loved me.. we got it on and then we text each other the next day. And then we didn't hear from each other until she text me out of the blue yesterday to find out how I've been?
Forget her intentions... what are yours? What are you trying to accomplish by talking to her and hanging out with her? Are you trying to be her friend? If so, are you ready for the "I found someone" talk?
My intentions? I don't know.. it seems to me that neither of us are over each other.. and we aren't exactly friends..
It's obvious to me that she's missing me.. and I'm missing her. I'm so confused!
Of course. You don't know what or who you want; she doesn't know what or who she wants.Quote:
Originally Posted by DazT
I am just about over my ex.. It just hurts me sometimes to see her flirting with my best friend. She exclaims that it isn't flirting.. But everyone knows it is. She keeps having cheap goes at me. She keeps attacking me for what I've said in the past.. It's irritating to say the least. The next time she has a go at me, I'll most likely retatiliate (Not physically of course.)
But anyway I'm holding up just great, what about you's?
HJ
I had exactly the same problem, but I can tell you that when I had contact with my ex and we were both missing each other, it just confused the hell out of me.
You miss her, she misses you, so your prob thinking why aren't we together then?
That's what I thought. But after some crappy back and forth round in circles BS, the only way it could go was back to NC.
Mainly because she ended it, and whilst I wanted to get back together I don't think she really wanted it enough, so we parted, yet again.
My advice, is go with NC and stay away from the drama and confusion because it really hurts the head!
I'm on day 4 of NC, and whilst I drove past her last night, we were both in cars (she was with a bloke) that doesn't count and I'm moving on as I know it's the only way to go.
I suggest you do the same. If she contacts you go from there, but don't wait and don't contact her as it will only cause you grief and mental anguish. Been there done that and got the t shirt - don't want it again!
Well said JP.
The NC is easier said than done for the first week or so. After about 2 weeks it it's a hell of a lot easier, in fact in my situation I only text her a couple of times after we broke up. Than again she got with someone else (she confirmed that when I saw her the other day), so I knew it was over the moment it was"over" and didn't really hang on. When you mentioned seeing her in a car with another bloke JP, I think (and ladies correct me if I'm wrong here) women find it a lot easier to find someone else than men. Its never nice to see the love of your life devoting their attention to some other chump. It happens though and we have to live with it.
NC is the way forward. When deep down you know its over, its over, so why drag it out? There's no point trying to be friends or meeting up to see how each other is or even getting pointless belongings back (unless they're really worth something).
Technically I'm on day 2 of NC (as I had to meet her for the first time in 4 months to sort out finances), though I don't really count this as we had to do it, and I desparately tried to get out of it, to no avail. Weirdly though, I'm feeling pretty good despite her confirmation of being with this other guy, and that they're going away together. Than again she somehow knew I was going out with someone else for two months after the breakup, so I had a sick sense of pleasure. "He scores the equalizer!"
Stick with it guys
Thank you :)Quote:
Originally Posted by jpm247
The NC is actually a lot easier cause my ex changed her phone number and acts like a 8itch now. I told her that she's not going to be successful and if she is in trouble, don't come crying to me.
Recently, I'm just as confused about myself... either a relationship + sex or promiscuity =/
Sure, there is a 15 year old girl who lives in Texas admitted that she likes me..
There's a 17 year old girl who lives about 15min drive away from me..
and yada yada yada...
It's so hard to keep track what I should do =/
Well, the last time I saw her was on Tuesday when she moved the rest of her stuff out of my apartment. I haven't spoken to her since. So the day count is 5. My fingers are starting to itch, but I feel like I will be strong enough to stand my ground. It's tough, and depressing knowing I may never experience anything with her again, but I'm starting to believe that it might be for the best.
Here is my background story:
https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...ectedly+dumped
Well I don't know what I was talking about earlier.. I'm such a walkover for her. Watching my friend dumping his girlfriend after she cheated on him and then seeing him all over her every time she wants him reminds me of me.. and how stupid I was (and still are kind of being).
I've realised that my ex is having problems with her new boyfriend.. they fall out and she comes running back to me and starts texting me. They make up and she shows no interest.
What a mug I am. But no more - I managed to get over my ex after 5 or 6 months.. we do a stupid thing what night and there she is - right back in my head. But after a great weekend and realising what a mug me and my friend are.. I'm going to get her out of my head because she is only a silly little immature girl who does not know who or what she wants. And when she falls out with her boyfriend, she wants me.. but I won't want her.
If she contacts you, keep telling her you're busy.Quote:
Originally Posted by DazT
Well done! You sond really strong :)Quote:
Originally Posted by DazT
I am in a predicament, I met up to talk to my ex the other, well more to have a go at him really, and we talked for hours and he apologised for everything and promised to be there for me now and do anything to make it right... so I said we could be friends and I'd let him support me, but then he took me out, and I drank, and we kissed a LOT and hugged and stuff and things were said... I couldn't take him back after what he's done and he doesn't want a girlfriend... but I AM still in love with him.. so maybe letting him support me isn't for the best? And actually NC is? :confused: x
It seems you already know what's best for you. It's hard to try to go the friends route when you're still in love with someone. No one said it was going to be easy.Quote:
Originally Posted by Boristheblade
Best of luck,
J
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