Originally Posted by
NorthernNiceGuy
Just posted this on one of my other questions... about a girl I had started to see.... Anyways I though it might be good to update a few of you that have helped me out on my situation and look for any words of wisdom you have. Thanks guys.
"uggghhh... Well unfortunately it didn't work out. Don't ask me why, because even her friends can't figure it out.... She was very excited about everything right from the first date. Her friends would come to me and tell me how interested and into me she was... literally 2 days after hearing about one of these talks from her friends she tell me out of no where (on msn of all places) that she just wants to be friends.... We went on 5 dates, over the span of about 2 and a half weeks... each going very very well. I guess I shouldn't beat myself up over it, its really not the end of the world and I know that. The only brutal side effect from all this is that I am now really missing my ex... And I hate it.
Furthermore.... While I was somewhat dating this girl i got a call from my ex... I was feeling so good with breakup recovery that I didn't even recognize the number and picked up. Well she was very upset.... one of her guy "friends" had hit on this girl I was seeing and told him she was seeing somebody... He then asked who and she actually dropped my name... Well of course he noticed my name and ran to my ex with this information. My ex told me how much she misses me and how shes not seeing anyone and doesn't want me to either, and that she wants to get together when she is home for thanksgiving (in Canada its the weekend after next) and wants me to come visit her.... to maybe possibly reconcile. Well I told her I was going to continue going on with what I was doing much to her dismay. The next day I then started to get texts like crazy asking me not to date, and that we are going to see each other and talk and gave me xo's and called me by my pet name. I let it go and didn't hear from her the next two days (last weekend)... she was going to toronto with a large group of friends. Anyways long story short after the weekend I heard from her through texts about how much fun she had and I could tell that she was no longer as upset and excited to re-kindle things. Not that I want to but it made me very angry, it was obvious that she was being extremely selfish... and I can't believe she had the nerve to actually say to me "don't date anyone" after she wanted the breakup 5 months ago. The simple explanation is that she hasn't found someone else "happiness" and doesn't want me to before her. I kept my anger to myself on this and decided to ignore her. But i realized something... I am not over her even after 5 months (was a 4 year relationship however)... I couldn't believe the impact she still had on me when she contacted me... i felt very depressed (almost like the first month of the breakup) and also noticed a pattern. I would ask for no contact and get it for 3 week stretches, but as soon as she would get upset she would come crying to me to make her feel better and to reassure her confidence that I still have feelings for her. And then when she would get it she would back off when she felt better leaving me sad and lonely after I had been doing really good.
Well I took some proactive measures, she was already deleted and blocked from facebook and msn... I have now blocked all of her email addresses from all mine and even changed my cell number this morning. I am starting to feel stupid that after 5 months I am now having to change my phone number, and am even kind of embarrassed by it... But now I really know that I won't hear from her again... There is relief and piece of mind in that... however I am left feeling very sad again. I know the feeling won't last that long this time, just sucks that after feeling so good for such a long I have hit a rut again.... Guess its part of the journey.
I know that's a lot, just felt like venting it though.... Maybe something better suited for the NC Calender.... Oh well"